Back to work advice?

jdubious
jdubious Member Posts: 113
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I've started back to work after 11 weeks out on leave. I had full left mastectomy and I'm still undergoing chemo, then will be having radiation. My prognosis is good, so I'm doing ok with my treatment plan, and I thought I had plenty of support, but I need your help with this.
It's been harder going back to work than I thought it would be. I've gained a ton of weight and lost my hair. It didn't really bother me when I was home most of the time, but now that I'm at work, I'm having a hard time interacting with people. I feel weird wearing a wig and it's hard to keep smiling. I just don't have my old confidence. Does anyone have any pointers?
thanks,
jill

Comments

  • sassysally
    sassysally Member Posts: 150
    Just be yourself, the people around that know what you are going through feel just as weird as you do. They dont know what to say or do. If you are not comfortable wearing a wig, Wear a bandana or a turban... or nothing if you are comfortable with that. The old confidence will come back in time. You are not the same person you were when you left. Now you are a survivor. Take it slow. You have to get used to the work environment again, and it has to get used to the new you. Your co workers just are apprehensive until they make sure its the same you. some think just cause they take off your breasts you lose your brain too. When you are comfortable with you, they will be too. Hang in there, it will get easier. Keep trying to smile... you are a survivor .. revel in that. ( And by the way... YOU LOOK MARVELOUS) I am a three time bc survivor. Have been there, done that. It will get better.
  • live42day
    live42day Member Posts: 64
    Jill,
    The first day at work with my wig was hard too. I had a mastectomy Sept 2001 followed with 8 chemo treatments. I was extra careful to dress well and always did my makeup a little better than normal. When you look your best, you feel good. Sally is right. Co-workers don't know how to act around you. I found out that if I made a point to act like I always had, it puts them at ease. Keep your sense of humor. My Dad always said if you can keep your sense of humor you can get through anything. Keep your head up and be proud. You're a survivor! How many people that you work with can say that?
    Janet
  • seeknpeace
    seeknpeace Member Posts: 259
    live42day said:

    Jill,
    The first day at work with my wig was hard too. I had a mastectomy Sept 2001 followed with 8 chemo treatments. I was extra careful to dress well and always did my makeup a little better than normal. When you look your best, you feel good. Sally is right. Co-workers don't know how to act around you. I found out that if I made a point to act like I always had, it puts them at ease. Keep your sense of humor. My Dad always said if you can keep your sense of humor you can get through anything. Keep your head up and be proud. You're a survivor! How many people that you work with can say that?
    Janet

    Hi...I am just in the middle of my fourth week back to work after a bilateral with reconstruct. I did not have to have treatment, but, due to anemial, lost a lot of hair. And my recovery was stymied by the anemia.

    I am really tired. I was thinking this morning coming into work that I feel totally drained and I am an investment professional. I am not a brick layer using my physical strength. I think that we have to go through an adjustment period for sure. But, I am going to have some blood drawn I think.

    Hang in there, don't despair. I am sure that it will get easier for us both. I am having a tough time remembering and understanding during my training with my new employer. It is scary.

    Jan
  • bunnie
    bunnie Member Posts: 233
    hi i agree with evryone else just go back and be your self eveyone knows what you have been through.I am getting ready to go back to work in Nov and my main concern is building back up too 8 hours a day.I have a very good company that i work for and they told me too come back when iam good and ready.dont worry about wering a wig just get some cute hats.Bunnie
  • wimpy
    wimpy Member Posts: 58
    I felt very uncomfortable when I first went back to work but found my coworkers and I adjusted well. I also lost some confidence and felt like my baldness made me stand out like a sore thumb. Things were different but the same (hard for me to explain that). I found that adjustments are needed on both sides and that you can't always expect it to be rosy each day. Hang in there, but don't overwork yourself. You have been through a great deal and still need to care for yourself.
  • jdubious
    jdubious Member Posts: 113
    Thanks for all your thoughts! I felt weird wearing a wig, so I have started wearing hats and scarves instead. I've had lots of positive comments on the headwear, so I feel better about my appearance. I agree that people don't know what to say or how to act - including me! So I'm just trying to be myself, but maybe a bit more positive. I can't wait to get done with chemo so I can start getting some exercise - my next goal is loosing some of the 50 pounds I've gained the last few months! Then I really will feel like my old self!
  • Mich1417
    Mich1417 Member Posts: 37 Member
    jdubious said:

    Thanks for all your thoughts! I felt weird wearing a wig, so I have started wearing hats and scarves instead. I've had lots of positive comments on the headwear, so I feel better about my appearance. I agree that people don't know what to say or how to act - including me! So I'm just trying to be myself, but maybe a bit more positive. I can't wait to get done with chemo so I can start getting some exercise - my next goal is loosing some of the 50 pounds I've gained the last few months! Then I really will feel like my old self!

    That's when I started feeling like my old self....when I got back to working out. As an aerobic instructor, I only gained 10 pounds over chemo and radiation, but that was enough to make me feel a little self-conscious. Keeping the couple of classes a week through my treatments really helped me to maintain my "normal" routine. Working out helps tremendously with energy levels! I looked at it this way....I have the best excuse in the world to not do anything or to fail at anything I tried. That made me want to do things all the more to show people and myself, that I could still do the things I loved. I remember thinking while on my 112 mile bike ride, "ooh, if I couldn't finish no one would blame me, I had breast cancer....how cool would it be if I could finish it having had breast cancer", and so I did! You are as strong as you think you are. Walk tall and think positive. People are put at ease when you talk positively and keep a sense of humor. Good luck!