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How do you tell a child?

mommaof3
Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2004

How do you tell a child about what they have been thru when they really know nothing about it?
My son was only 4 1/2 mos. old when he was diagnosed and went thru almost 5 years of chemothearpy and he still does not know why he only knows he went to the hospital alot. How do I tell him without scaring him to death? He is now 7 1/2

SwimCoop's picture
SwimCoop
Posts: 17
Joined: Apr 2003

Tell him that he WAS really sick with something cancer and that he was in the hospital so that he could get better and now he is better, wait till he is a little older before giving him too many details, allow him to enjoy his childhood while he can. Once he finds out how sick he was it may be harder for him to be a kid and right now he probably won't understand anyway. But you never know, I was 8 when I was dx and I understood quite a bit, more then anyone thought I would.

Jenniefer
Posts: 3
Joined: Mar 2005

I was 6 when I was dx with kidney cancer and my family just told me the truth. MOST people don't think a child is smart enough to understand about some things but it would suprise people how much kids can absorb. I understood and took an active part in my cancer treatment. I beleive he is old enough to understand now what happened. I also think that it might help to take him to a hospital where other chrildren have cancer and let him meet some of them. It would help him understand better. So I think you should just tell him the truth. Yes cancer kills but not everyone.

Teresatllps
Posts: 1
Joined: May 2005

My son was 2 and half when he was dx. He is now almost 8 yrs old. They understand more than what you know. It is better that they know that it was not their fault or anything they did wrong. When he ask questions, have conversation with your son and tell him. They are so grown up because they have had to grow up with cancer. Hang in there mom because it get better. My son plays ball, gets all A's in school and reads at a 5th grade level.

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