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My daddy is gone

legina
Posts: 10
Joined: May 2001

My name is Legina and I am 32 years old and the mother of 2. My daddy died in September of 2001, and I am really having a hard time dealing with it. He was my best friend and I didn;'t do anything without asking him first, and now he is gone and I don't know what to do. I do have a good family and my mother and my sister seem to be doing fine with this, and I feel guilty because I can't seem to get on with life. I never smile anymore, I cry all of the time and my kids always ask me why I'm so mean and grouchy.
I want to be happy for them and my family, but I can';t do it!! How do you get over something like this???? Life is so unfair, my daddy was only 50 years old and never sick a day in his life until he got small cell carcinoma and then in 19 months he is gone forever.... Can someone give me some advice??? Thanks for listening and God bless you.
Legina

kenmc's picture
kenmc
Posts: 3
Joined: Apr 2002

Legina,
No words can help lessen the void, hurt, and ache deep inside you feel. I too lost my father several years back. I felt as if you did and was totally at a loss. But I found my faith in God and TIME!! heals in time. Life does go on and YOU must understand that..You never want to forget the memories both good and bad, because those are the things that keeps him alive inside. Trust me when I say "This Too Shall Pass" Be strong darlin and know you are not by yourself!

Kenneth - New Orleans

nutt
Posts: 140
Joined: Sep 2001

Being a father, with cancer, three grown children and two grand children I can tell you what I believe you daddy would have wanted - same as all fathers. He would expect you to remember him always but put the living up front in life. We strive all of our lives (however short) to provide and insure our children are provided for and most importantly -- happy and good citizens and if it is part of your life are exposed to God's word, can't ask for much more.

Little verse I keep posted may be of help
"Yesterday is History. Tomorrow a mystry. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the PRESENT! We think this is special.... live and savor every moment. Life is NOT a dress rehearsal." author unknown
Joe

dpomroy's picture
dpomroy
Posts: 137
Joined: Dec 2000

You say that your daddy is gone forever...find him. Find him in your children's laughter, find him in the carrying out of a tradition that he passed along to you, find him by journaling all the special times that you shared...just find him and you will start to be OK.

bullfrog13's picture
bullfrog13
Posts: 216
Joined: Apr 2002

DEar Legina, Hi, I lost my father last july-while i was still in hosptial after surgery.. I am riddled with guilt that i wasn't there for my mom who had to plan the funeral and make all arrangements all alone... i begged DR to leave hospitla a day early to attentd the funeral.. i went with 5 drain tubes in tow... and was on so much medication i barely remember even being there.... I think you just learn to deal with the loss and keep his memory alive. He would not want to be sad. He would want and need for you to move on for the sake of your own children... think how you would feel if you knew that they were sad.... God bless you and keep you... and yes life is unfair.. but you have to cherish yesterday, dream for tomorrow but live for today!! and always remember to dance like no one is watchin.. jerilyn ribbitfrog13@icqmail.com

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