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Survivor lap relay for life

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chas707
Posts: 30
Joined: Apr 2002

I am newly diagnosed, well 3 months, still going thru chemo and reconstruction and have not yet returned to work. I signed up for my relay for life team at work well before I ever imagined that I would be diagnosed. I worked for the oncologist that I am a patient of now about 4 years ago so I have always been "aware" of the fight against cancer and have participated in several realy for lifes. I now work for a bank and have been asked by several friends and family if I am going to walk the survivors walk. Realy is this fri and I signed up for the survivors walk, uncertain though. I asked my chemo nurse, 'am I really a survivor or am I still a fighter?' she said you are certainly a survivor and will always be a fighter. I am rather uncertain about doing the survivor walk because there still are so many people who still dont know what i have been through and we are a medium sized community so I know I will see lots of old friends and associates. What I am afraid of is the emotional impact this may have being so newly diagnosed for as you all know these last 3 months have been a whirlwind and I really havent had time to think about how I feel about it. If anyone can give some insight.
thanks,
cahstity

ludasue
Posts: 98
Joined: Apr 2002

Hi! There's no question you are a survivor!!! If you feel up to and want to walk the survivor lap then you should do so. It's a personal decision to make. I remember the 'whirlwind' you speak of. You have had alot to deal with and alot on your mind lately. Just remember, there's always going to be another walk. If you don't feel up to it this year, you can try again next year. I am a 4 year survivor and have yet to make that survivor lap even though I have signed up every year. I have faith that one of these years I will make it!!! Best wishes and keep us informed how you are doing. My email is ludasuesnout@yahoo.com if you ever want to talk. Angie

jmears
Posts: 270
Joined: Jul 2001

I had just finished chemo this time last year and the Avon 3 Day walk went from my town Frederick, MD to Washington, DC. My husband and I voluteered at the set up and start. When all those ladies (3000) started to walk through the arche of balloons that marked the beginning of the trail I totally lost it ... I was crying and sobbing. I can't decribe how overwelmed I became. So because I'm a glutten for punishment I went to DC for the closing ceremony when all the Survivors walked in together and cried and sobbed again. It was wonderful and horrible at the same time. I don't think I will every be emotionally over the cancer ...but physically I feel great now. The 2002 walk is this weekend from Balitmore, MD to DC. I'm not walking but I'll go to DC for the Survivor walk again and just seeing those ladies and cry my eyes out again. My thought is "what's wrong with emotion?". Good luck in what ever you decide to do. You'll be fine!! Jamie

nasa2537
Posts: 317
Joined: Apr 2002

Hi & welcome! You are a survivor from the day of diagnosis. You are fighting for your life....be proud of that, and flaunt it!!! The survivor's lap is a great thing...you deserve the recognition. We just had ours 2 weeks ago. I am from a town of about 80,000, and there were literally hundreds of survivors, some of which were kids, and many of which were going through treatment of some kind. It's a tough thing at first ....feeling a little self-concious? I did...it was hard to say the word "cancer." But, the sooner you start saying it out loud, the easier it is to accept that it is not just a word, but something you have, and something you are willing to fight....and win!! You will probably be pleasantly surprised at the support you will get from the ones who don't know yet. And, there may be someone else out there who is newly diagnosed, who is just waiting for someone else to say that the fight is worth it.It also lets all the people on teams know that this is why they do what they do. I think your body and mind take over for you at first, and give you time to do research so you can be informed. Some day, you will probably have a day when the realization hits...I was post-surgery, and waiting for radiatiopn to start. I was reading Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book (which you need to get..excellent source of info), and all of a sudden, the word cancer jumped off the page and stopped being just a word, and became something I had. I cried all day, but felt so much better afterwards. We are all here to support each other, so any time you need support of any kind, post a message or e-mail anyone here...we're all pretty easy to get along with, and want your experience through this to be as easy as possible for you. My e-mail is millionairs2@aol.com write any time, and enjoy the survivor's lap! God bless...Cyndi

tonie
Posts: 12
Joined: Apr 2002

Cahstity,
I was a survivor for only 4 weeks when I walked in the Susan Kolman walk for life. It was the most uplifting thing I have ever done. The spirit of every single person there was fantastic! From the day we are diagnosed we are survivors and fighters. Go and walk in the relay and hold your head up high. YOU ARE A SURVIVOR!
I am a 6mth survivor and if you would like to talk my e-mail is starkantoinette@msn.com
God is good and life is GREAT!
Tonie

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