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grandma
Posts: 162
Joined: Feb 2002

Hi all, thanks for the support, took your advise and talked with hubby(larry)It helped, but......Water? I drink lots already, I gotta drink more?
Almost all of you had, or are having radiation. Dr. said I won't need it. I don't understand.
By acting tough is the only way I keep from crying, and I don't even know why I cry.
You have these feelings to?
Grandma/Flo

jmears
Posts: 270
Joined: Jul 2001

Hi Flo
I'm a huge cryer .. always have been and don't know why. It got really bad a few times during treatment ... then really, really bad after everything was done. My doctors diagnosed me with severe depression and put me on Zoloft. I am so much better ... just back to my normal amount of crying. Hee Hee ... I laugh now too. I was told that a cancer diagnosis of a loved one or yourself can trigger depression. You've had a double shot. Don't be shy to tell your doctor(s). I was never a strong believer in medications for "mood" problems. After all don't we women have that whole mood swing thing sewn up. But I must say ... to take the Zoloft (which for me has no side effects) and to feel so much better and be better for my family ... well ... it seems like a miracle to me. Just my thoughts ... I hate to hear of anyone feeling so sad ... cause I know how it feels. And for radiation ... if the Drs. don't suggest it ...great. The chemo is the systemic treatment that will attack any stray cells throughout your body. The radiation is localized just to the original tumor area ... so they must feel confident that they got all the tumor. I've gone on much to long. Good luck. Jamie

24242
Posts: 1417
Joined: Mar 2001

I want to remind us all that we all can be very hard on ourselves, for there, no one else has to be. Flo going back and reading your profile I can see that you have had allot to deal with in such a short time. Like you after fighting cancer, the fight for my life, I realized life didn't stop even though I was sick and wanted to get off that train of life. Like you I had to face the death of a young man, thank God it was my son that was spared, his best friend shot and killed and another is paralysed for life. I can imagine the pain you must of felt, I am so sorry for your loss. Can't help but wonder what it is that still allowed me to stand here, just as I am sure both your husband and you have. Let the feelings flow and now you have to accept all there is and move forward, the train of live is rolling, either we are on or we are off, nothing stops for us, not even our feelings.
I am so sorry Flo that you and your family have had to face the losses. So many of us have, in so many different ways, amazing isn't it just how we find our selves still standing, still caring and there for still with tears in our eyes. I don't know about you, but I am still learning to cope with all there is left for me.
Just remember to be comfortable with your decisions and if your not go back and ask a couple more questions.
Be good to yourselves,
Tara24242

kat02
Posts: 76
Joined: Nov 2001

Hi,

Yes, I find that I cry more. It isn't in front of everyone, and I don't even cry that much in front of my husband. However, when I am with my good friend and I share some of my experiences I find that I do cry. She has a Ph.D. in psychology and assures me that the crying is not a problem. It's probably how I release the stress and pressure. It doesn't interrupt my activities. I also find that bad things in life upset me more. In particular events that don't need to happen. I think this is because I realize how fragile life is. I can't even stand to watch movies that have senseless deaths in them.

And yes, you have to drink lots and lots of water. Wait, maybe that's part of the increased tears?

Love, prayers and hugs.

Kat

maud
Posts: 183
Joined: Nov 2001

Hi Flo,
I like you did not have to have radiation,my Drs. got together and decided I didn't need it. I don't know why either but I felt it was an answer to my prayers,I had to have three operations on the third it was my mastectomy.I lost my older sister to breast cancer in June of 20001,she had found a lump four years earlier and never told anyone and never wnet to the Drs. so it was to late for her when she finally went to the hospital,she knew she had it the same time I did but never said a word to me and we were very close. I miss her alot she was an agoriphobic I don't know if I spelled that right but she never went out of the house for about 8 years,so that is why we never found out until it was to late .I still cry alot and I have been through with chemo for one year this past November. I think it helps to get out feelings out in the open and to be able to share with others . Keep you chin up and I will keep you in my prayers.
God Bless
Debbie

jeancmici
Posts: 682
Joined: Feb 2001

Hi Flo,

Just read your webpage - you have had a lot of heartaches - I am so sorry. I was stunned to read how Dr. DIMWIT handled your lump from 1995-2002. Don't you feel like sueing him? A lot of doctors used to say 'we'll wqtch it' - not so often nowadays. Was he an old guy?? You know what I mean- way behind on updating his information since medical school.

Good Luck and hugs, Jean

sueholm's picture
sueholm
Posts: 221
Joined: Oct 2000

Grandma, don't know what the others have said, but all cancers are different. The doctors resource all the research they can to determine what would be the best treatment for your type of tumour, its size, its type, its grade, whether it is in the nodes, what type of surgery you have had, to determine what sort of treatments will give you the best outcome. Some don't have chemo, some don't have radiation, some have neither. So do not worry that your course of treatment is different from mine or anyone elses. What you can do, if you want, is go to other sites on the net about breast cancer and read up on treatments. and also, ask your doctor why no radiation...keep asking questions till you are satisfied with what you hear. I also got copies of all the test reports and doctors notes, and those were very informative.....And oh yes, we all got real scared at the beginning, so you are just the same as the rest of us...pretty chicken to start with!! Love Susan

shirlann
Posts: 235
Joined: Oct 2001

Hi, grandma Flo, this is Grandma Shirlann! If you had a mastectomy, you don't usually have radiation. Radiation is for lumpectomy people. Don't feel bad, you didn't miss anything. Stop crying, you have had a BIG shock, and will grieve as long as your body wants you to. If you have the blues too long, thing about an antidepressant for a while, it was a miracle for me. Also, be sure you are on a slew of good vitamins, they help your overall health and feeling of well-being. God bless you, Shirlann

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