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2012/"caregiver to survivor in a year".

danslifenow's picture

2012,january 6th. Shortly before midnight my wife passed away from lung cancer.She and I had bravely fought this disease since her diagnosis in october 2010,it had been a tough 14 months.this was the day my caregiving duties ended.Over the next 6 months I had been directed to some self-help meetings by some wonderful people at the Hospice House in Merrimack New Hampshire,where my wife and I had lived for the last 2 months of her life.I have to say and always will remember this as a place where "angels gathered". Well as life went on and I attended the weekly meetings to help myself deal with the grieving process,I was learning that I was not alone. As time went by and I was getting close the final week of the particular "spoustal group" meetings that I had been attending,which happened to be about the end of May,beginning of June,when i happened to be at work when i suddenly had a strange pain on the right side of my chest.The pain i got this day was kind of a strange pain because normally i tjink i would have put off calling the doctor but this pain had a weird sort of feeling to it,something that "told" me to call my doctor and sure enough I got the call I was hoping i never got but in the end probably saved my life as it set off the series of tests and trials that follow the diagnosis,and that i was earily so familiar with as i had just been through it all.Well as I went through all the tests I ended up having stage IV lung cancer as it was a very large tumor that had spread to my rib bones also.After passing lots of tests to figure which route i needed to take to best treat this disease I was connected to a Dr.in Boston at Mass.General Hospital in Boston,MA where I was put through more tests and scans and finally set up for a surgery in August to remove the upper right lobe of my lung.Well surgery day came and when I woke up,I found out the Dr.could not complete the surgery as the cancer had spread a little more than the scan had showed.The next step,I was told was to get chemotherapy and radiation to shrink and kill some or most of the tumor as soon as possible,I just needed some time to recover from this surgery,so aftert a few weeks I was set up for 5 weeks of radiation therapy,everyday for 5 weeks and in combination with chemotherapy added in the first and last week.During this regiment,about 2and1/2 weeks into treatment i got high fevers and had to be hospitialized for a week with pnemonia present in the bad lung,with 1 week in hospital and 1 week to recover i went back to finish the regiment.Now finished the doctors were all happy with the results and now i could get on with the surgery but the entire lung would now have to be removed,instead of just the lobe and surgery was set up for mid-november,Thanksgiving week at that. Well its been about 8 weeks now since surgery and here I sit telling my story and hopefully it will have a positive impact on anybody who reads it! Even now that i know there is a 50/50 chance of the disease returning and I need to be carefully monitiored on a regular basis and try to keep a strong and sound mind.I think of my family daily,my wife who was so strong through her journey,my grandchildren,even on a bad day help me when i picture their little smiling faces,and everyone in my family that calls and texts me on a regular basis to check on me,I wish to thank very much.

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