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Grief and Bereavement

Archives for September 2010

From a man's perspective
I lost my wife to colon cancer July 29th. I post here a few times a week and more when she was alive battling her cancer. We would have been married 32 years this August 26th. It is therapeutic for me to share what losing a spouse is like from a man’s perspective. Perhaps it is not that different for a wife but since I am…
Well the grief tidal wave arrived...
Sadly is time for me to switch gears...this thing has me in is cross hairs and unless I face off with it I will never be whole again. The past couple of weeks have been rough...thinking the new car was the beginning of it all..but anyway...my emotions have been all over the map and my choices and decisions less than…
What would have been....
Well, today would have been our 25th wedding anniversary. I was dreading it so much, but it actually turned out to be a good day. I saw a bereavement counselor yesterday and she suggested that I get out with friends or family, and I did and enjoyed myself without thinking too much about "everything". I have read here so…
Falling Down Sad
While, in the past, I've been reasonably coordinated, since my husband's death I've felt that my timing is a bit off. Earlier this week I took a bad fall. Fortunately, I only have a badly-sprained wrist and a cracked knee cap. A word to the wise. Be careful of the side-effects of grief in all their permutations. Hatshepsut
Counseling??
For any of you that see or have seen a counselor. I made an appointment with a counselor who's name I got through my insu co and who's practice was primarily grief counseling. What I didn't know until I arrived that she was actually a psychiatrist. Ok I guess. I've never had this experience before so didn't know what to…
This really gets my back up
Hi all , I have to share with you what has really got my back up since loosing my wonderful, beautiful courageous young mum 56 days ago, its the pieces of paper you get from official departments. When you are born you are issued with a birth certificate and when you die, you are issued with a death certificate. Is that all…
Dating?????
I am not sure if this subject has been brought up before or not. Have any of you thought about when you might date? I realize that most everyone here has recently lost their loved ones but I thought I’d throw the subject out and see what happens. Don’t worry-I’m not asking any of you out, well then again…..(LOL) I was “Set…
Memory Quilt
I thought I would share this photo of a quilt I had made of my husband's favorite shirts ( and jeans!). It arrived last week and I am pleased with how it turned out. It is really helping me with my grief - It is on my bed and reminds me of good memories Mary
Well They Arrived...
Back during a lovely spring day....Bill sat outside drinking his iced tea...and ordered flower bulbs for next spring...this is something he did every year. My heart broke watching him do it....I knew he was not going to be here to plant them and he knew too...as I later found a "map" he put together to tell where to plant…
A day in the Life
OK so I decided this has to stop and I needed to start making more of an effort. Now I have been doing things, last week I went to the US Open finals, so it's not like I am hiding in the house, but everything I've done to date is at someone else's prodding. So, Saturday, summer's over, first Sat with no pool, cleaning lady…
A place that tears built
Hello, We are trying to get volunteers together that would like to help with a special project for terminally ill patients and families. I had a mother and daughter that was diagnosed with cancer and sadly have lost both of them, however, my husband and I are looking to help others that are currently going through…
How do you live without your mother?
My mom passed away 2 months ago today. She was 65 years old. She was diagnosed with stage 4 non-small cell lung cancer on 12/29/09. She was a genuine woman. A wonderful, funny, caring, sympathetic, loving woman. She was my best friend. Her and my father were married 42 years. My brother is 41, my sister is 40, and I am 26.…
Just venting and open to feedback
I wasn’t sure if I should add this to an already existing post or make a new one – so anyway here goes. My brother in-law is well to do. He is retired and has a good income. When my wife (His only sister and sibling) died I asked if he would be willing to share half the cost of her funeral. He agreed. The funeral home…
People are so clueless....
Well I was at work last night....and during a nanu second of down time one of the other nurses I work with start this dialoque with me about Bill....where it came from I had no idea....thinking it started because we were talking about cooking and I said I really don't cook...I prefer not too and eat out most days. Anyway…
Did your loved one want to go, or fight until the end?
I have been caring for my beloved mom for about two and a half years now as she has suffered through ovarian cancer -and I mean suffered in the strongest sense of the word. We had no idea what we were in for in March 2008 when she had her initial hysterectomy/debulking..we have been through chemo, radiation, MRSA, staph,…
Anyone gone through denial?
I am now going through a period I call denial. I have been keeping so busy, I just push my grief to the side and think of other things. I remember last week....tears all day, taking to my bed....and just feeling the worst that I ever have. I know that I will go through that again, but I am so scared of it that I am just…
airports are sad
Well i picked up my mother in law yesterday and found that waiting for her to come off the plane there were so many people coming and going so i am sitting right by the gate well it was a hurtful ordeal only because husbands and wifes were hugging and kissing being picked up at the airport by the spouse. I was crying a few…
This site..
I have been going though another rough patch...the good thing is that each one I hit...I handle and the next one gets less horrible. Some family drama is also adding to the mix...and trying to keep the two things separate...Bills death/family drama..is not easy. People in general..including family members simply don't…
Changing of the Seasons
I think I am doing ok working through my grief as well as can be expected. I visited with family and friends the first part of the weekend. I came home last night and emotionally realy felt hit hard with feeings of grief and sadness that my husband will never experience summer again. Have anyone else had any similar…
Question RE: Bereavement Groups
Hello. What exactly goes on in a bereavement support group? My husband's cancer center offers such a group. Hatshepsut
Numbness has worn off.....
Last night was horrible. I could not quit crying and there was a physical pain in the pit of my stomach. There is an open, raw wound that hurts more than any pain I have had. I want to go to church today but feel like I may just lose it at any time. I'm depressed....no drugs helping at this point. Cold and rainy weather…
Anniversary
Well, our anniversary has almost come and gone. It went ok. Actually, yesterday may have been the hardest because I was anticipating today. This morning I went to our cancer support group. This is the group Doug and I went to together and I continue to attend. Then I did some shopping and met some friends for lunch. One of…

Grief and Bereavement

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