I will share what happened to those that want to listen. It has changed me. Am I wrong or am I reading too much into it? Your experiences are welcomed and appreciated. Thank you.

What do you and other men with a previous prostate biopsy think? Does this "color" ever happen to you? Thanks!

Thank you Manuel

The surgery was stopped because my vocal cord was not detected suddenly. So the surgeon wanted to wait on the other part of my thyroid.

My voice is ok thankfully.

But since surgery my one side of my throat feels odd when swallowing..maybe numb. I've had numbess on my right side neck..sometimes parts of that side of my head. Also sometimes a dizzy feeling. The other night my right rib started intense pins and needles..and tightness.

I called the doctor about the rib thing and he said muscle spasm. He is also saying my symptoms are anxiety.

I'm not an axious person and the numb issues are worse upon waking up then gradually get better. But they also just "happen". 

Does anyone know if this is normal recovery stuff or should I go back to my doctor and insist that he look into this further?

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

My husband was diagnosed in January of 2017 with stage 4  squamous cell carcenoma. He had a large mass that ran from the back of his throat, up through the soft pallet and into his sinuses. (We were terrified) We underwent weeks of radiation and 3 rounds of chemo to get rid of it, and it seems to have worked (fingers crossed) Treatments ended July 30th. We were assured that the THICK secretions of saliva and mucous would subside. After 6 months, they have changed their tune and told us that it is pretty much here to stay, and he will have to be on his peg tube for feedings from now on. I'm not EVEN going to apologize and say: "I'm sorry" but THIS isn't GOOD enough! NO! It isn't anywhere NEAR good enough! I want my man to be able to chew, swallow, and ENJOY food again. If anyone has any thoughts, ideas, (Hell, CRAZY ideas) I am willing to try anything. We are currently using ginger ale to rinse his mouth (it helps to break up the mucous) His secretions are so thick, that he is unable (pretty much) to swallow even water. Gentlemen, I am willing to try anything if it will help.

Thank you.

i have my follow up with my Trama Surgeon on Aug. 31, 2017 I'd like to go into the appointment with the right question.

Theres a little something i wanted to share with you and ask your opinion.

We have met with this guy about 2 months ago, have spent 5 amazing days together and then he left, as he lives in another city.

Since that moment every single day we were in touch, had long Facetime converstaions, lots of messages,we were sharing our daily life moments and emotions and became very very close. We also agreed to meet as i would come and visit him, but unfortunately my visa got rejected and im not able to visit him and be there for him in person. 

But since that moment we found out i wont be able to come and visit him, he has changed. He started pushing me away, started ignoring my messages and calls, so it does feel like we are loosing each other. Im not trying to ask anything or to argue, i just swallow my pride and try to act as if nothing has happened. He got really sad and frustrated after i told him about the visa issue.

I also know when he doesnt talk/reply to me he goes on Grindr and apparently chatting to someone else. And to be honest this is the main concern i have. I know patients going through cancer do push others away, but the fact he is on Grindr pisses me off.

First after we found out my visa got rejected we also agreed to meet somewhere else, where we could stay together for a few days. He first liked the idea and we started making a plan. But now.....he just doesnt want to talk, and sometimes replies with very "empty" messages.

The fact he had a cancer was ON since very beginning. Since the first moment i found out i was showing my support and was there for him when he was in the hospital on chemo, when he was going to the appointments with doctors ecc.

I do not know what to do, as it hurts me. I want to be there for him, i want to help him. 

Has anyone experienced something lke that before? 

Thank you to all of you who have alerted us to the PM spamming from earlier today. I apologize for the inconvenience. While we do have securities in place, we are not always able to catch all spam, and we are trying to figure out how this one got around our system. If you received a message from jegac1 please do respond to it or share any of your information.

Jegac1 has now been blocked from the CSN site.

Again, I am sorry for the inconvenience. Please continue to report any email spammers or questionable behavior you see.

Best regards,

Anne

CSN Support Team

I was diagnosed with CLL (Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia) last year at the age of 47. I just registered on this site. I try not to think about it, but it is what it is. If anyone here has it or knows of someone who has it I will be more than glad to hear about your experiences with this disease. I am kind of lost for lack of better words.

Thanks,

Josh 

a little bit of background info.  my partner and i have been together for eleven years.  last year he was diagnosed with hypopharyngeal cancer.  it is a recurrence, he had it about five years ago.  the first time he was on chemo/radiation for three months before going into remission.  he didn't suffer any major side effects except for extreme lethargy.  this time, however, it is having a major impact on our lives.  he's been on chemo for a year and has emptied his savings and taken out a loan.  i am also financially stressed because i'm picking up some of the slack and can barely get by.  the financial stress is what has been the major impact for the past year.  but, tonight was a new and different impact.

he had been feeling sick all day, nothing new.  but, then, in the middle of the night i was woken up by his vomiting.  he was vomiting so loudly that i know the entire apartment building could hear it.  it was like he was trying to vomit out his entire insides, i've never heard anything like it.  it was awful.  and he had diarrhea at the same time.  i don't want to go into details but, suffice to say, i am shaken up.

so anyway, i just wanted to say hi.  

Rowan

CSN Support Team

Thank you to those who've alerted us to the spamming from earlier today, and we sincerely apologize for the inconvenience. While we have security measures in place, we can't prevent all spam. We are currently working on measures to try and block this. If you received a message, please do not respond or share any of your information. 

The user, drjulius, has been blocked.

Going forward, please continue to report any spammers or questionable behavior to us. 

Sincerely,

Kim

CSN Support Team

Thank you to those who've alerted us to the spamming from earlier today and we sincerely apologize for the inconvenience. While we have security measures in place, we can't prevent all spam. We are currently working on measures to try and block this kind of discussion board and chat spamming. If you received a message about a cure for cancer, please do not respond or share any of your information. 

This user has been blocked.

Going forward, please continue to report any spammers or questionable behaviors to us. 

Sincerely,

Laura E

CSN Support Team

Thank you to those who've alerted us to the PM spamming from earlier today and sincerely apologize for the inconvenience. While we have security measures in place, we can't prevent all spam. We are currently working on measures to try and block this kind of private message spamming. If you received a message from rita44556 prompting you for money, please do not respond, or share any of your information. 

This user has been blocked.

Going forward, please continue to report any email spammers or questionable behaviors to us. 

Sincerely,

Kim

CSN Support Team

Some of you know that we have had previous problems with a particularly tenacious scammer named sarah, and unfortunately she has struck again. While we have security measures in place, we can't prevent all spam. We are currently working on measures to try and block this kind of private message spamming. If you received a message from sarah989888 prompting you for money, please do not respond, or share any of your information. This user has been blocked.

Going forward, please continue to report any email spammers or questionable behaviors to us. We apologize for the inconvenience, and thank you for alerting us!

Rowan

CSN Support Team

To access chat, you must be a CSN member and logged on.  Once logged on, all you have to do is click chat in your left navigation menu. No waiting for the chat application to load, clicking the link opens up a CSN page with the chat widget embedded in the page. 

For more information about how to use the new chat, please go to the technical board FAQ's:

http://csn.cancer.org/node/276321

Thank you everyone for your patience!

CSN_Nick

Hi, I'm a gay man who has been involved with a married man (common law) for a few years.  He has several young teen aged children and lives with his girl as a family.  He claimed to be in a loveless relationship and I've always had commitment issues, so our connection seemed like a "win-win."  Eventually his feelings grew out of control and he decided that he wanted to be with me exclusively, while staying with his girl.  I fought him tooth and nail because of my commitment issues and because of the fact that he was already in a relationship.  It was very obvious to me that he was knee deep in his living situation and leaving his girl would not be an easy task.  I would have to patiently wait on the side line for the process to be complete, all while being faithful to him.  I was absolutely against it.

Long story short, last summer we had a big fight where I told him that our relationship couldn't go any further than it already had. It was a bitter discussion and some nasty things were said.  Then 3 months later he was diagnosed with NH Lymphoma.  When he called and told me, I dropped everything and came to his side.  Yes, his wife was there as well.  She knew that we were friends but had no clue about our sexual relationship.  I helped her care for him and even went with him to dr's appointments when she wasn't able to.  He experienced a LOT of complications and was near death several times.  I stood by him and helped nurse him back.  Now he's undegoing chemo treatments and is madly in love with me for being there in his time of need.

The problem is that the feelings aren't mutual. I love him, but I do not want to be in a commited relationship with him, or anyone else for that matter.  After he was stabiized enough on his chemo treatments, I started to pull back and spend less time around him and his family.  He immediately noticed and questioned me about it.   At first, I wasn't as direct as I needed to be, but eventually told him how I felt.  He's now devastated and feels like I misled him.  However, I don't feel like I did.  I love him and wanted to help him get well. I didn't and don't want to totally abandon him.  In a few days he'll be undergoing stem cell replacement therapy and will be hospitialized for a few weeks.  He told me that he and his wife have come to an agreement and that she will be moving out soon.  This bit of info has no baring on my feelings as I still don't want to be in a committed relationship with him.  

My question is what should I do?  Should I stay around to help him through the last stage of his treatment or should I just move on.  I've suggested moving on but he makes me feel selfish and guilty for even thinking about bailing out.  Now, I know that I was wrong to begin with, but I can't change the past.  And now that we're here, I really do not know what to do.  Somebody please help me...

I'm 51 years old and in November found a tumor in my kidney. I had my kidney removed in December. Stage 3 kidney cancer. There's no approved chemotherapy for kidney cancer that has no evidence of metastasis. I've got close to a 50% chance of it metastasizing at some point in the future. I've been pretty shaken up by the whole thing. I decided to take part in a drug trial and am in a 50/50 double blind placebo study for an adjuvant chemotherapy of a drug called everolimus (afinitor). I know that any form of cancer is scary, but when my uncle the oncologist says that this kind of cancer is on his short list of cancers he'd never want to get, it's scaring the hell out of me. If it spreads, it would probably go to lungs first then bone, and finally brain. However, it could spread anywhere.

I get my blood tested every 6 weeks on this trial (just to make sure the drug isn't making me too sick, it's not for cancer, there's no blood test for this kind of cancer) and I get CT scans every 18 weeks. I have to take the drug every morning for 1 year. So far, the side effects have been tolerable. Fatigue. Constant sinus congestion and cough. Some nausea that comes and goes, or is there sort of mild but constant. The drug was somewhat effective with people that had advanced metastatic RCC, so I'm hoping it might work and kill off any remaining cancer. The median survival of metastatic RCC (renal cell carcinoma, aka kidney cancer) is 2-3 years with current treatments.

It's good to know there's a gay men's support forum.

I live with a room mate and have a boyfriend of 3 years (we don't live together), but he's 20 years younger than me, and even though he's trying to be understanding, this is really stressing that relationship. I used to sleep at his place 2-3 nights a week, but now I will only stay one night per week because I sleep really poorly at his place and I think it's very important for me to sleep well and take good care of my health. Of course I rarely feel like having sex since I got sick. It's not just the fatigue and nausea, but I think after having a major surgery like that, it feels like your body has been violated and honestly I just want to be left alone. I've been thinking I should completely break it off with him. He needs a lot of support himself, and I'm not sure I can do it anymore. I know I need to concentrate on taking care of myself. But I'm not sure I can end it. From the reading I've done, I need to really concentrate on nutrition, exercise, sleep and self care during this period to do what I can to boost my immune system so the cancer doesn't return. This relationship was stressful even before I got cancer.

Well, I've said hello and spilled my guts all at once. Sorry, but I've been kind of holding back a lot of this on the other support forum. Didn't think that my relationship issues would be understandable to most of the people on that forum. :) I'm looking forward to getting to know you guys.

Best wishes,

Todd