Six Years Out From Stage III Base of Tongue- Hang Tough!

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Tim6003
Tim6003 Member Posts: 1,514 Member

 


Six years ago this week I got a call at work from my doctor at 6pm on a Friday. I said to her "this can't be good". It wasn't.

My CT scan had revealed a tumor at the base of my tongue with metastasis to my lymph node. Only a biopsy could confirm cancer, but the doctor, when pressed, felt certain that's what it would be. It would turn out to be Stage III. All my research showed that I had a 50/50 chance of being around in five years.

That weekend was the Pumpkin Fest which I was taking the family to. I did not want to tell my wife, so I kept my secret for another five days.

It's not everybody's belief, but it's mine. I'm still here and I believe it's due to the good Lord. Because I believe at the end of the day, He calls all the shots.

However, there are so many others who played a roll that are special to me. My wife and her family, my children, our church family at that time and those wonderful doctors and nurses.

There's also the Oral Cancer Foundation. People like Eric Statler and Brian R. Hill who are just the tip of the many heroes amongst that group who have impacted the lives of oral cancer patients.

Many people don't know about oral cancer, that it often does not have symptoms until late stage, that a simple screening by an informed dentist can many times detect oral cancer.

I have some serious and not so serious side affects. To wake up each day to the six other faces in my family makes everything worthwhile.

To all my friends I met and knew with oral cancer who are no longer with us. I think of you often. You and your families are in my thoughts. I live for you as much as I do for myself and my family.

There is a saying I have come to love, "cancer did not bring me to my knees, it brought me to my feet"

I'll continue on for as long as I am blessed to be here. I'll live like I've never done and I'll be grateful for every day I have.

 

I would like to add that last year, September 2016 I went on a feeding tube, most likely for life they tell me.  I don't use it as I should, not on purpose, just trying to give up drinking and eating via mouth is very difficult. 

In the last 6 years I have lived and done things I always wanted to do.  Since I was 16 years old I had a dream of living in Alaska.  I told my wife "if I get well, you know we are moving to Alaska".  Got to alaska 3+ years ago!!!  Having five children (now ages 7-19 - but at my diagnosis they were ages 2-13) I keep busy.  I'm the stay at home dad now and my wife, who was a stay at home mom for 16 years, went back to work 3 years ago.  I worke for 5 years after treatments, but some of the complicagtions got so hairy I truly could not work a regular job (I have good days and bad days so to speak) so I applied for and was granted disablility.  I filled out my own paperwork and fortunately I was granted disability with no rejection or delays (other than the normal 6 month waiting period).

So for those of you going through the worst of it or just starting, just remember this, we do what we have to do.  Take the treatments, fight like heck, say your prayers (if that's for you) and lean on those you can....there is no guarantee of what short or long term side affects one can have, we are all different, but the bottom line is if you are having a good day, go do something with it.  If you are having a bad day, listen to your body and rest, take care of it, do what you need to do to get another good day :) 

Whispered prayers for any and all of us on this crazy bus ride.

To all my friends on here who I use to chat with and see, I miss you all and pray all of you are doing well.

 

I included a recent picture of me and my children as well as one from my neck burns during treatments.  I'm 100 pounds lighter (yes, 100lbs) and I have aged in appearance due to treatments, but I wouldn't trade places with anyone :)  I hunt, trap, split wood by hand, snowmachine and pretty much do anything I want.  We all go from something and if I go from recurrence of cancer or if I get mauled by a bear, it doesn't matter to me anymore because in my mind, I won. 

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  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
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    Erbitux brother

    Hi Tim,

    So nice to hear from you.  I knew last night when I posted your Erbitux reaction picture, that I would hear from you soon.  That was fast.

    I am sorry for your issues, but love your good attitude.  You were always a source of inspiration.  It is great that north to Alaska was a fulfillment of a dream.  I too have issues and struggle daily with striving to reach the simplest of goals.  Like you alluded to, “that’s life” and it is best to enjoy what we can.

    I read through the list of souls we have lost and it is a reminder of how much we learned from those members.  Many others, we don’t know what happened, but I pray for them.

    Be safe up there and have fun with the family.  Your cancer family is always here for you.

    Matt

  • Tim6003
    Tim6003 Member Posts: 1,514 Member
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    CivilMatt said:

    Erbitux brother

    Hi Tim,

    So nice to hear from you.  I knew last night when I posted your Erbitux reaction picture, that I would hear from you soon.  That was fast.

    I am sorry for your issues, but love your good attitude.  You were always a source of inspiration.  It is great that north to Alaska was a fulfillment of a dream.  I too have issues and struggle daily with striving to reach the simplest of goals.  Like you alluded to, “that’s life” and it is best to enjoy what we can.

    I read through the list of souls we have lost and it is a reminder of how much we learned from those members.  Many others, we don’t know what happened, but I pray for them.

    Be safe up there and have fun with the family.  Your cancer family is always here for you.

    Matt

    Thank you Matt

    I feel guilty sometimes not being on here to lend stories and support to others.  I guess I use the excuse having so many kids and living where I do takes all my time :).

    I have not read through the list yet.  I will have to do that.

    It's great to hear from you and I always enjoy your witt and humor.

    I actually did not see your post of my neck, just coincidence I happen to get on, I guess it's that bond thingy of us cancer surviviors and in particular you and I since, so to speak, we were on the same bus. :)

    Best my friend, best to you -

    Tim

  • swopoe
    swopoe Member Posts: 492
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    You have won! And look at

    You have won! And look at that family! Beautiful! This month is 2 years out for my husband. Every day is a gift. You are living the dream!

  • donfoo
    donfoo Member Posts: 1,771 Member
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    Blast from the past

    Tim, so glad to get an update from you. I'm hoping you are still getting out and enjoying nature and the wilderness up there. Don't be a stragner - drop in more often. Don

  • Lisa I.
    Lisa I. Member Posts: 16
    edited November 2017 #6
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    Wow! You are an insoriation

    Thank you for sharing and reminding everyone that no matter what life hands out, there are GOOD, WONERFUL things to enjoy in the one you have!

    You made a comment about being strong, I found and bought a sign that has been sitting next to his chair - a good reminder: 

    “You dont Know how strong you are until THAT is the only choice you have!”

    It sure has helped us thru this second bout of HN cancer...first was larnyx, 10 yrs ago. Then in July, my hubby once again faced the awful news of P16+ but scarier as it was stage 3, no site of origin, metastisized to a cluster of lymph nodes in his neck. It seemed that each stage of the treatment was harsher than the last with multiple surgeries, radiation and chemo. BUT treatment is over, he is healing and recovering and we feel blessed! Yes, our prayer warriors, friends and family have been awesome! 

    We are making plans and hsve been able to help other friends who are going thru cancer treatments themselves! thanks for being an inspiration and what a BEAUTIFUL family! Good for you, living your dream! 

    Hugs, Lisa I.

  • tommyodavey
    tommyodavey Member Posts: 727 Member
    edited November 2017 #7
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    Good To See You Again

    Hi Tim,

    It is so refreshing to see a post from you. You and I struggled fairly close to each other although your case was much worse than mine.  You always had an uplifting attitude and even did that prayer group offer which touched me.

    Your picture today is much different from how I remember you.  So much weight lost.  I am just sorry to hear you are still having trouble and needing a feeding tube to live.  You are allowed to complain once in awhile my friend.  You've never been quite the type to do that.  Of all places, this is the safe place to vent your frustrations so please feel free to unload anything that's bugging you.

     

    Tom

  • jtl
    jtl Member Posts: 456
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    Hi Tim

    I rarely come on the site and I am glad I did today.  I enjoyed our conversations back in the day but I am sorry to hear of your swallowing issues.  I remember those pics.  I also remember you living in a motorhome where you were having the rads because of the distance from your home.  Your are indeed a survivor.  The kids are looking great and so are you.

     

    I have fared pretty well a little bit of muscle cramping in the neck from the rads but nothing real bad.  Iirc we were sort of the Erbitux pioneers, my medical onc had not even heard of it until I mentioned it to him.  Sounds like it is being used a lot more now.  

    Take Care

    John