The week in review: my cancer journey

wholfmeister
wholfmeister Member Posts: 315
edited April 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1

Last week on Wednesday April 14, I had a CT scan.  I spoke with the nurse on Thursday; she said the doc would call after he studied the scan with the radiologist and consulted his other expert friends. Office visit scheduled for later in month.

by Monday, he hadn't called, so I assumed must not be much to report...life is good!...no chemo scheduled!  I'm going on vacation!  I booked a hotel room at the sea shore for next weekend.  Woohoo!

Tuesday, he calls.  Some nodes are maybe just a little smaller (I think they are really unchanged, but he said it that way to make it sound like a positive.). But there are new nodes of concern.  Still very small, but still...they weren't of concern before.  So, I will continue chemo until August.  Re-starting AFTER my trip to the beach!

Wednesday my dermatologist called to report the biopsy of the non-healing sore on the top of my head was clear...no cancer!  She hoped the sterile biopsy incision was healing, and it is.  Yeah! No further extensive incision of my scalp!

This chemo allows my hair to grow, and it was already about 2 inches, so with the good biopsy report, I decided to see what my hairdresser could do.  She is the sweetest!  She first shaved my head two years ago; she trims and styled each new wig; she sends me cheery cards.  So Thursday, I revealed my new hair to her.  It was very emotional.  I cried.  My hair is white-gray and thin and patchy and frizzy.  It is so ugly!  She let me cry...I think she cried, too.  She gave it a good cut with a nice shape, all the time talking about what we could do with it as it gets longer...different cuts, coloring, products for the texture.  I just cried.

My husband deserves a medal.  He didn't say anything at first, and after a while, he said, "I think its's kinda cute!"  He said I looked like a friend who we both really love.  It was such a dear thing to say.  I just cried.

Friday was a new day.  No time for yesterday's tears.  My husband's friend has been repeatedly inviting us to come to his church to hear a famous guest minister tonight.  (So famous, I've never heard of him.) I didn't want to go, but I could tell Mike did, so we went.  After 1 1/2 hour of praise music, which I liked, and an hour sermon, which I appreciated, I was ready to go.  But the main event had not even started yet!  The dramatic, miraculous, unexplainable faith healing.  We were a bit mesmerized at first.  I had never witnessed this in person.  I'm afraid Mike wanted me to go up and get my miracle Healing.  (Thankfully) Others knew what was coming and the line for the miracles was quickly very long...like 75-100 people.  We snuck out the back.

And today, Saturday, I told my husband I am 100% certain God is still in charge.

Comments

  • NoTimeForCancer
    NoTimeForCancer Member Posts: 3,368 Member
    Thank you for letting us walk

    Thank you for letting us walk with you. 

    I have to say I was sitting here getting teary about the haircut story from your week.  I remember everyone telling me "it's just hair". But it is MY hair and I liked what I had.  Of course it was said by everyone who still had their hair or never lost their hair.  In the end, I still don't have to like the way it came in but it is hair.

    But in the end?  You are right.  He is in charge.

  • Alexandra
    Alexandra Member Posts: 1,308
    Dear Merrily

    No one would argue that hair is a nice thing to have. Not even hard-core feminists. I am sure it will start growing strong after you're done with chemo in August.

    Hang in there just a little longer to get rid of those "areas of concern".

    I hope you have a beautiful and relaxing trip to the beach with your sweetheart of a husband.

    Many hugs,

    Alexandra

     

  • scatsm
    scatsm Member Posts: 296 Member
    keep on keepin' on

    That's kinda what we do, isn't it? 

    I wish there were an 'end' other than that end we don't want; but there doesn't seem to be that for us below the belt gals...

    A weekend at the beach sounds lovely...I adore the sound of the ocean. Have a great time, Merrily, and keep thoughts of what awaits when you return at bay.

    When my hair grew back after first round chemo it was grey and white, frizzy and thin....now 2 years later it is dyed brown, highlighted and thick....around the sides and back...it's still frizzy, but then it always was...as for the front....10 hairs to spread around grrrr

    xoxoSusan

  • wholfmeister
    wholfmeister Member Posts: 315
    I Knew

    I knew you all would understand. It is not my journey alone. To one degree or another, you all have been there. And you know it really isn't about the hair!  That was only my 4th time to cry about this damn disease. Four times in two years isn't too bad! here's to us and our journeys!

  • lovesanimals
    lovesanimals Member Posts: 1,366 Member

    I Knew

    I knew you all would understand. It is not my journey alone. To one degree or another, you all have been there. And you know it really isn't about the hair!  That was only my 4th time to cry about this damn disease. Four times in two years isn't too bad! here's to us and our journeys!

    Thanks for sharing your week with us

    Have a wonderful time at the beach and when you return, may your chemo do a number on those "small areas of concern"!

    Kelly

  • Rosamond M
    Rosamond M Member Posts: 86 Member
    What a week!

    Having such a caring husband and understanding hairdresser is a real bonus in your

    week.  I think we all find our selves facing those "down times " and are entitled to have

    a few tears. All on this board understands because at one time or another we have all

    been in the same position and we all know that living with this disease is learning to

    live with uncertainty. I am so pleased that your week is ending on a much brighter

    note and look forward to hearing about your "beach break"   

  • Cafewoman53
    Cafewoman53 Member Posts: 735 Member
    Hair !

    My hair story is similar to yours , I think the constant chemo has fried mine. Crying is a good thing sometimes it can help to let go of what is on your mind.

    Enjoy your holiday I am jealous it sounds wonderful.

    Easter I went out with just a hat no wig or scarf for the first time, it was great because I have a convertible and even though my hair is less than 2 " it was blowing in the wind !

    Great news on your head biopsy ! My last scan showed some areas decreasing and new areas of concern,I don't think the doctor would tell you something just to make you feel better. It just shows that the chemo will work for you.

    Colleen

  • poopergirl14052
    poopergirl14052 Member Posts: 1,183 Member

    Hair !

    My hair story is similar to yours , I think the constant chemo has fried mine. Crying is a good thing sometimes it can help to let go of what is on your mind.

    Enjoy your holiday I am jealous it sounds wonderful.

    Easter I went out with just a hat no wig or scarf for the first time, it was great because I have a convertible and even though my hair is less than 2 " it was blowing in the wind !

    Great news on your head biopsy ! My last scan showed some areas decreasing and new areas of concern,I don't think the doctor would tell you something just to make you feel better. It just shows that the chemo will work for you.

    Colleen

    Love it

    no chemo!  Enjoy your vacation..buy sone new sexy outfits...Val 

  • kimberly sue 63
    kimberly sue 63 Member Posts: 421 Member

    I Knew

    I knew you all would understand. It is not my journey alone. To one degree or another, you all have been there. And you know it really isn't about the hair!  That was only my 4th time to cry about this damn disease. Four times in two years isn't too bad! here's to us and our journeys!

    The journey is tough and

    The journey is tough and emotional...cry anytime!! It helps. Kim