Getting over whelmed.

jim and i
jim and i Member Posts: 1,788 Member
in Head and Neck Cancer #1

5 am is getting to be the witching hour. It seems that is when Jim gets out of bed and falls or has to have a BM. Add to that his mind is going more and more each day and I am operating on 4-5 hours of sleep. The hospice councilor suggested I put Jim in their facility for a few days to get some rest but I don't think I would sleep anyway because I would be worried. Jim has gotten so weak he can barely shuffle two feet with a walker. Other than less urine output and it being dark, his body doesn't seem to be shutting down. The worst thing is the mental confusion. For some reason he seems to think we are in a car not a house. And he still keeps catching those fish and rolling them in the blanket on the bed. This is a cruel disease. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Pray God gives me rest so I can continue to help Jim  in his final days.

Debbie

 

Comments

  • Ladylacy
    Ladylacy Member Posts: 773 Member
    #2
    Jim and You

    Debbie, I'm so sorry to hear about Jim, but I can understand what you are going thru.  For you to get some rest, maybe you should put Jim in-hospice like hospice suggested that way they can regulate his medicine and you can get some rest.  This way it would help get your physical and mental strength back to help you to help Jim.   I remember when my Uncle had to put my Aunt into in-hospice.  He said it was very hard but that he needed to do it for her and himself.   They were able to regulate her medication and then she came home for what little time she had left.  Does Jim's hospital bed have guard rails?  They would help keep him in bed.

    I know that in the near future I might have to make that decision too.  It will be hard but sometimes we have to do things we don't really want to.  I read your updates and I thank you for the information because I know it will help me as I see my husband's health changes and so does hospice.

    Wishing you peace and comfort -- Sharon

  • Hondo
    Hondo Member Posts: 6,636 Member
    #3
    Hi Debbie

     

    Life is so hard at times when we see a love one suffering, but rest for sure in your faith in Jesus. He did not have to come and suffer for us but He did it so that we might have faith in Him and what He did for us and that was to give us life. Not a life in this old world of sin and sickness but life in a new world where there will never be a sick day or death. I have planes to meet you and Jim there on that resurrection morning. But for now I continue to offer up my prayers in your behalf to give you the strength you need through this time of trouble.

    God be with you my sister

    Tim Hondo

  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
    #4
    Praying

    You are both in my prayers daily...

    You need to find some help for yourself to get some rest also..

    John

  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member
    #5
    debbie, i wish we could be

    debbie, i wish we could be there to help you and give you some rest.  i'm sorry for all you and Jim are going thru.  Please know that you are both in my thoughts and prayers and you will remain there always.

    God bless you,

    dj

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
    #6
    Bless you

    Debbie,

    Thoughts and prayers to give you strength and guidance during these times.

    Matt

  • jim and i
    jim and i Member Posts: 1,788 Member
    #7
    Ladylacy said:

    Jim and You

    Debbie, I'm so sorry to hear about Jim, but I can understand what you are going thru.  For you to get some rest, maybe you should put Jim in-hospice like hospice suggested that way they can regulate his medicine and you can get some rest.  This way it would help get your physical and mental strength back to help you to help Jim.   I remember when my Uncle had to put my Aunt into in-hospice.  He said it was very hard but that he needed to do it for her and himself.   They were able to regulate her medication and then she came home for what little time she had left.  Does Jim's hospital bed have guard rails?  They would help keep him in bed.

    I know that in the near future I might have to make that decision too.  It will be hard but sometimes we have to do things we don't really want to.  I read your updates and I thank you for the information because I know it will help me as I see my husband's health changes and so does hospice.

    Wishing you peace and comfort -- Sharon

    Sharon, He has rails and I

    Sharon, He has rails and I put them up but he still crawls out at the gap in the bottom. Where there is a will, there is a way.

    Debbie

     

  • Jan Trinks
    Jan Trinks Member Posts: 477
    #8
    Praying for strength

    Debbie:

     

    Of course y'all are in my thoughts and prayers and since it's 5:34 a.m. you're probably up right now.  I woke up about 4:00 after falling asleep in the recliner. I do that a lot!  I so feel for you and Jim with his mental state declining; that must be a terrible thing to go thru and watch.  Try to rest when he does; if you can.  I agree with you about putting him the hospice facility and being worried; I would be too; although if it becomes necessary I would assume you could stay with him although that can be tiring too.  I hate this beast too!  But remember the poem "What Cancer Cannot Do or sometimes I think it's titled "Cancer is So Limited".  My favorite ones from Cancer is So Limited are:  It cannot cripple love; corrode faith; suppress memories invade the soul, reduce eternal life and the last one in this version is:  It cannot lessen the power of the ressurection.  I have this on a necklace, bracelet and magnet!  And although this is so true it doesn't lessen the anguish, pain, and sorrow of facing such a monumental loss but hopefully gives encouragement and strength to get thru it.  Praying always for you and Jim.  God Bless, my friend.

     

    Jan (Basketcase)

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