Yep, another person is/has or is thinking of leaving this forum...

wawaju04976
wawaju04976 Member Posts: 316
edited March 2013 in Colorectal Cancer #1

Yep, another one has left the forum. I hope this bully realizes who she is. Everyone should be able to comment and share treatments. We are adults. Something that works for me might work for someone else. This bully has put down many things, juicing, my "purple juice" as she calls it, and other things. A couple of other people have mentioned leaving the forum. And it is because of a bully who is not content until she pulls up eons of back posts. It's pretty sad that someone seems to be happy by making others feel uncomfortable. I have not been here long, but I am smart enough to read and recognize bullying when I see it. Maybe she will read this and figure out who she is. I wish she would take the old saying...if you have nothing good to say, then don't say it. I guess the only way someone like this can feel good is by making others feel bad. I don't like to single out a person, but I have seen her do this to people in here over and over. We are all suffering, or we are here for someone we know who is suffering. I wish she'd stop making it worse by scaring people off. This is not meant to continue this bickering. I'm hoping someone, maybe the monitor?, would let her know how what she is doing is hurtful to the forum and to specific people.

Judy


 
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Comments

  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member
    and...

    Why did you post this again?

    Is it your intent to keep this "war" going?

    Please take your issues with the person you reference to Private Message.

    Marie who loves kitties

  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215

    and...

    Why did you post this again?

    Is it your intent to keep this "war" going?

    Please take your issues with the person you reference to Private Message.

    Marie who loves kitties

    Agreed!!!!!

    Agreed!!!!!

  • wolfen
    wolfen Member Posts: 1,324

    Agreed!!!!!

    Agreed!!!!!

    Th-th-th

    That's All Folks!

    Wolfen

  • wawaju04976
    wawaju04976 Member Posts: 316

    and...

    Why did you post this again?

    Is it your intent to keep this "war" going?

    Please take your issues with the person you reference to Private Message.

    Marie who loves kitties

    It got posted again because I

    It got posted again because I didn't post it as a discussion topic. It was buried under someone else's. Do I want to keep this going? No, but I also don't like watching people get bullied away. It's not right. I have sat here watching this go on, and yep, I'm stating my 2, 3, maybe even 5 cents worth. Perhaps that person will figure out she's a bully. I don't understand why the moderator has not stopped her. Perhaps all will be quiet until someone else mentions a treatment she doesn't agree with.

  • devotion10
    devotion10 Member Posts: 623

    It got posted again because I

    It got posted again because I didn't post it as a discussion topic. It was buried under someone else's. Do I want to keep this going? No, but I also don't like watching people get bullied away. It's not right. I have sat here watching this go on, and yep, I'm stating my 2, 3, maybe even 5 cents worth. Perhaps that person will figure out she's a bully. I don't understand why the moderator has not stopped her. Perhaps all will be quiet until someone else mentions a treatment she doesn't agree with.

    I don't think this is going to get the attention that you want

    because folks are rather tired out perhaps from the recent discussions and have tried to move on to more positive topics.

    May I suggest that you write to the individual in a private message and try to work this out directly?  You may find that works better in a situation like this.

    Thank you for considering this suggestion,

    Cynthia

  • wawaju04976
    wawaju04976 Member Posts: 316

    I don't think this is going to get the attention that you want

    because folks are rather tired out perhaps from the recent discussions and have tried to move on to more positive topics.

    May I suggest that you write to the individual in a private message and try to work this out directly?  You may find that works better in a situation like this.

    Thank you for considering this suggestion,

    Cynthia

    I'm not looking for

    I'm not looking for attention. I'm not the only one feeling like this. I've suggested this forum to some people going what we all are going thru. Personally, I wish I hadn't and hope they don't join. Perhaps you don't mind sitting back watching people decide to leave because of personal attacks. I've sat here biting my tongue not to say anything. But when people decide they need to leave because of one, I'm speaking up. I have said my piece. Consider it said. I can now sit back, at least feel I've said what I have felt, and others have felt. And yes, if the bullying continues, I'll speak up again. Let's move on to more positive discussions. And let's let people feel free to put their options out there without feeling that they are going to come under attack.

    Now, on to more positive "stuff,"

    Judy

  • devotion10
    devotion10 Member Posts: 623

    I'm not looking for

    I'm not looking for attention. I'm not the only one feeling like this. I've suggested this forum to some people going what we all are going thru. Personally, I wish I hadn't and hope they don't join. Perhaps you don't mind sitting back watching people decide to leave because of personal attacks. I've sat here biting my tongue not to say anything. But when people decide they need to leave because of one, I'm speaking up. I have said my piece. Consider it said. I can now sit back, at least feel I've said what I have felt, and others have felt. And yes, if the bullying continues, I'll speak up again. Let's move on to more positive discussions. And let's let people feel free to put their options out there without feeling that they are going to come under attack.

    Now, on to more positive "stuff,"

    Judy

    Oh no ... my apology ... I was not meaning to imply that

    you were purely seeking attention ... bad choice of words on my part.

    I just meant that it seems you would like some resolve with the situation you were describing and I was suggesting that perhaps the best way for you to achieve that is to address the individual directly instead of the public forum.

    I hope that you do stay here as I see you have just recently joined.  As in any family, sometimes we go through rough patches.

    Sincerely,

    Cynthia

  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866
    Let's go for Three weeks of this nonsense

    This has got legs as the saying goes... I can't believe how much the proverbial Dead Horse is being beaten in this forum about this topic.

    If someone wants to leave, then leave. 

    If someone has a bone to pick on another member, please do it through PM's.

  • Brenda Bricco
    Brenda Bricco Member Posts: 579
    PhillieG said:

    Let's go for Three weeks of this nonsense

    This has got legs as the saying goes... I can't believe how much the proverbial Dead Horse is being beaten in this forum about this topic.

    If someone wants to leave, then leave. 

    If someone has a bone to pick on another member, please do it through PM's.

    If you guys are beating horses...

    I'm out of here! Tongue Out

    Seriously, it's time to let it go until the next time. If the cons of being a member is out weighing the pros then maybe it's not the group for you. I have been quiet latley but I am still here because this group has made a difference for me.

    The good news is that if we are bickering that must mean that we are still kicking! Wink

  • jen2012
    jen2012 Member Posts: 1,607 Member
    PhillieG said:

    Let's go for Three weeks of this nonsense

    This has got legs as the saying goes... I can't believe how much the proverbial Dead Horse is being beaten in this forum about this topic.

    If someone wants to leave, then leave. 

    If someone has a bone to pick on another member, please do it through PM's.

    Hehe...looks like you are
    Hehe...looks like you are guilty of not letting it go either phil...just sayin :)
  • geotina
    geotina Member Posts: 2,111
    Judy:

    As you can see I am a very long time poster and member of this community.  I have stayed out of the recent bad vibrations on this board.  Kind of a been there, done that kind of thing.  It happens every now and again. 

    Unfortunately, I found your post extremely upsetting.  You don't like to single someone out but that is exactly what you have done.  There is a lot of knowledge on the board.  You do not mean to scare people off but that is exactly what your post intends.  Shame on you.

     

    Whether I agree or not with with Pete, Marie, Manwithnoname or anyone else it really doesn't matter, but I am respectful of their input. When someone new comes to the board to ask about potential side effects of a certain treatment, only those with knowledge can answer.  Drive them away and you lose that knowledge and there will be no one to answer.  The same is true if someone comes asking about certain supplements, those that have used them can answer if they haven't been driven away.

    If you don't like someone, that is your choice but please, stop adding fuel to the fire and acting like a bully yourself.

     I have not flagged your post, someone beat me to it, but if it had not been flagged, I most certainly would have flagged it as inappropriate.

     

    Tina

     

  • LivinginNH
    LivinginNH Member Posts: 1,456
    geotina said:

    Judy:

    As you can see I am a very long time poster and member of this community.  I have stayed out of the recent bad vibrations on this board.  Kind of a been there, done that kind of thing.  It happens every now and again. 

    Unfortunately, I found your post extremely upsetting.  You don't like to single someone out but that is exactly what you have done.  There is a lot of knowledge on the board.  You do not mean to scare people off but that is exactly what your post intends.  Shame on you.

     

    Whether I agree or not with with Pete, Marie, Manwithnoname or anyone else it really doesn't matter, but I am respectful of their input. When someone new comes to the board to ask about potential side effects of a certain treatment, only those with knowledge can answer.  Drive them away and you lose that knowledge and there will be no one to answer.  The same is true if someone comes asking about certain supplements, those that have used them can answer if they haven't been driven away.

    If you don't like someone, that is your choice but please, stop adding fuel to the fire and acting like a bully yourself.

     I have not flagged your post, someone beat me to it, but if it had not been flagged, I most certainly would have flagged it as inappropriate.

     

    Tina

     

     
    Amen.

     

    Amen.

  • k44454445
    k44454445 Member Posts: 494
    Please

    please, everyone stay. all of you who have been on this board for awhile have a lot of great info & support for those of us who have not been here long. we need you. if someone has a problem with someone else, please take it to a pm. if someone chooses to leave i think we can  figure it out without an announcement from another person. we are here to support each other & not to cause division. just like in the world outside our cancer world, there are alot of opinions that we might not agree with but we should listen to that persons' choice.  after all, we all are doing what we believe to be the best tx to save our life.

    judy

  • z
    z Member Posts: 1,411 Member
    PhillieG said:

    Let's go for Three weeks of this nonsense

    This has got legs as the saying goes... I can't believe how much the proverbial Dead Horse is being beaten in this forum about this topic.

    If someone wants to leave, then leave. 

    If someone has a bone to pick on another member, please do it through PM's.

    Phil

    Does this remind you of the post where the same topic gets argued about and then fades away just to come back again and start all over?  I remember you posting that reference before maybe 1 year ago.  I'll try to find it.

    Lori

     

  • dixonduke
    dixonduke Member Posts: 7
    k44454445 said:

    Please

    please, everyone stay. all of you who have been on this board for awhile have a lot of great info & support for those of us who have not been here long. we need you. if someone has a problem with someone else, please take it to a pm. if someone chooses to leave i think we can  figure it out without an announcement from another person. we are here to support each other & not to cause division. just like in the world outside our cancer world, there are alot of opinions that we might not agree with but we should listen to that persons' choice.  after all, we all are doing what we believe to be the best tx to save our life.

    judy

    Thoughts of a board rookie
    Look down to the left here.....(I'll wait).......

    As you can see I haven't been here very long.....so the total tonnage of what I don't know about my cancer and my future treatment(s) could stun a team of oxen in its tracks. Shoot most of what I have read about alternative treatments.....well, I don't even understand. That doesn't mean I won't understand/need them in the future. If people are chased away we lose the cumulative knowledge of the board. We seriously don't think someone will be coerced into a treatment they don't agree with, do we? I think some people are more interested in being right, rather than being happy.

    But what do I know, I am just the rookie here...
  • wawaju04976
    wawaju04976 Member Posts: 316
    dixonduke said:

    Thoughts of a board rookie
    Look down to the left here.....(I'll wait).......

    As you can see I haven't been here very long.....so the total tonnage of what I don't know about my cancer and my future treatment(s) could stun a team of oxen in its tracks. Shoot most of what I have read about alternative treatments.....well, I don't even understand. That doesn't mean I won't understand/need them in the future. If people are chased away we lose the cumulative knowledge of the board. We seriously don't think someone will be coerced into a treatment they don't agree with, do we? I think some people are more interested in being right, rather than being happy.

    But what do I know, I am just the rookie here...

    Well, Tina, I would think if

    Well, Tina, I would think if my post was gonna be flagged, then there certainly should have been some flagging a few days ago. But I'm not going there, people saw her in action. If you wish to keep this going, then keep commenting. I said my piece, yes I am new here, but it doesn't take long to figure out who "runs" this. No, I will not pm this person; I have heard from people who do, and she's just as bullyish. I hope she's the flagger. Perhaps she'll think before posting. Enough...And yep, me too, Dixon, I'm a newby. That was what I saw, and many others say, the other day ("gotta be right"). I too want to see the different possibilities out there, and I hope people still put the alternatives out there. And they should do so without being attacked.

    Judy

  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member

    Well, Tina, I would think if

    Well, Tina, I would think if my post was gonna be flagged, then there certainly should have been some flagging a few days ago. But I'm not going there, people saw her in action. If you wish to keep this going, then keep commenting. I said my piece, yes I am new here, but it doesn't take long to figure out who "runs" this. No, I will not pm this person; I have heard from people who do, and she's just as bullyish. I hope she's the flagger. Perhaps she'll think before posting. Enough...And yep, me too, Dixon, I'm a newby. That was what I saw, and many others say, the other day ("gotta be right"). I too want to see the different possibilities out there, and I hope people still put the alternatives out there. And they should do so without being attacked.

    Judy

    Clarification only

    I am the person who flagged your post here.

    Marie who loves kitties

  • John23
    John23 Member Posts: 2,122

    Well, Tina, I would think if

    Well, Tina, I would think if my post was gonna be flagged, then there certainly should have been some flagging a few days ago. But I'm not going there, people saw her in action. If you wish to keep this going, then keep commenting. I said my piece, yes I am new here, but it doesn't take long to figure out who "runs" this. No, I will not pm this person; I have heard from people who do, and she's just as bullyish. I hope she's the flagger. Perhaps she'll think before posting. Enough...And yep, me too, Dixon, I'm a newby. That was what I saw, and many others say, the other day ("gotta be right"). I too want to see the different possibilities out there, and I hope people still put the alternatives out there. And they should do so without being attacked.

    Judy

    Hi Judy!

    I should really stay out of this, but I’ve always tried to understand the position that an “underdog” is taking, when they post something that sounds harsh.....

    Someone has to be the devil’s advocate, otherwise only one side is represented!

    The one that you’re finding so offensive isn’t really that bad at all. What she was attempting to do, was tell those that post their comments here, that unless they’ve tried the “remedy” and had success with it, they shouldn’t be trying to convince others to try it.

    Even if an individual knows personally of someone that’s had success with the remedy, it is better than simply reciting advertising rhetoric.

    We’re all here to learn of new developments, but we should be careful of what we are recommending to others! There are some pretty expensive purported “solutions”  out there, that do little if anything for our fight to stay alive!

    I would not be an advocate for Traditional Chinese Medicine, if it hadn’t worked so well for me. Those that have used “Folfox”, etc, and have had success with the more conventional remedies, do so without being “flamed” or harassed. Likewise those that have used an alternative and found great success with it, should not be harassed, either!

    But simply reciting “forward looking statements” generated by an industry looking for investors, or a new “remedy” seeking users for it, should be discarded as “junk science”. Unless of course, one feels that “magnetic therapy” is the solution to cancer’s ravages..... and in that case, it should be discussed in it’s own live setting, where one can pass out tinfoil hats freely!

    The poster you found offending, was only “telling it like it is”. Harsh and cold, perhaps, but within the guidelines of the usual forum dialog.

    I find it more offending when a poster attempts to tell me that I have just been very lucky using useless herbs......

    Knowing “right from wrong” when it comes to fighting cancer is difficult enough, without having to deal with misinformation and the reciting of some corporation’s wishful thinking.

    Advertising schemes worth noting:

    “Where’s the beef”, and “Show me the money”.

    Caveat Emptor at it’s best!

    Healthy wishes at you!

    John

     

  • manwithnoname
    manwithnoname Member Posts: 402
    John23 said:

    Hi Judy!

    I should really stay out of this, but I’ve always tried to understand the position that an “underdog” is taking, when they post something that sounds harsh.....

    Someone has to be the devil’s advocate, otherwise only one side is represented!

    The one that you’re finding so offensive isn’t really that bad at all. What she was attempting to do, was tell those that post their comments here, that unless they’ve tried the “remedy” and had success with it, they shouldn’t be trying to convince others to try it.

    Even if an individual knows personally of someone that’s had success with the remedy, it is better than simply reciting advertising rhetoric.

    We’re all here to learn of new developments, but we should be careful of what we are recommending to others! There are some pretty expensive purported “solutions”  out there, that do little if anything for our fight to stay alive!

    I would not be an advocate for Traditional Chinese Medicine, if it hadn’t worked so well for me. Those that have used “Folfox”, etc, and have had success with the more conventional remedies, do so without being “flamed” or harassed. Likewise those that have used an alternative and found great success with it, should not be harassed, either!

    But simply reciting “forward looking statements” generated by an industry looking for investors, or a new “remedy” seeking users for it, should be discarded as “junk science”. Unless of course, one feels that “magnetic therapy” is the solution to cancer’s ravages..... and in that case, it should be discussed in it’s own live setting, where one can pass out tinfoil hats freely!

    The poster you found offending, was only “telling it like it is”. Harsh and cold, perhaps, but within the guidelines of the usual forum dialog.

    I find it more offending when a poster attempts to tell me that I have just been very lucky using useless herbs......

    Knowing “right from wrong” when it comes to fighting cancer is difficult enough, without having to deal with misinformation and the reciting of some corporation’s wishful thinking.

    Advertising schemes worth noting:

    “Where’s the beef”, and “Show me the money”.

    Caveat Emptor at it’s best!

    Healthy wishes at you!

    John

     

    Let me be clear John

    Your saying no treatment should be posted here unless it's worked for them personally?, but if we know someone who's treatment worked that is allowed ...(just)

    anecdotal evidence is fine, but peer reviewed puplications with double blind randomized trials can't be disscussed because...it hasn't worked for anyone here personally?

    Well that's really nice of you.

  • annalexandria
    annalexandria Member Posts: 2,571

    Let me be clear John

    Your saying no treatment should be posted here unless it's worked for them personally?, but if we know someone who's treatment worked that is allowed ...(just)

    anecdotal evidence is fine, but peer reviewed puplications with double blind randomized trials can't be disscussed because...it hasn't worked for anyone here personally?

    Well that's really nice of you.

    I thought John was saying,

    that if it was not information that came from the type of studies you mention, that it should at least be based upon one's personal experience.  This would be as opposed to saying "a friend's cousin" or what have you.  I could be wrong, but that's how I took what he said.  AA