What can you tell me??

mopar said:

HELLO, BILLIE
You have such a beautiful smile, and a strong, fighting spirit. My first-hand experience with your question would be my mother who passed away from colon cancer. My mother never complained, never asked for pain meds. However, it was apparent in the last 2 weeks that it would eventually be the best choice, as she may begin to sleep more and not be able to ask for anything. Sure enough, in the last 3 days my mother became more quiet, more restful. She was at home, and my sister and I were by her side.

I think it's important to explore your options, and find what will be best for you. Since this is a process, you may only be able to make those decisions as the options are presented to you. But it sounds like you have a lot of fighting spirit left, and as you know, there are many testimonies of hope here.

As for 'what to expect', I would like to share this with you - in the last week or so my dear mother began to sometimes stare into the distance, maybe at the mirror in her room, or the window. It appeared as though she were having a conversation, because she would nod her head, or point to something. When I asked her who she was talking to, she said my Dad, who had passed in 1994. At times she also mentioned her mother, who was also gone. Once, she said my Dad asked her to come and sit on the grass with her. She said it was so bright green, and so soft. And once she mentioned that her mother gave her a drink of the coldest, freshest, purest water she had ever tasted.

Because of my strong faith, Billie, these events brought me comfort. And I know that they were of comfort to my mother also. It made her journey so wonderful, pain free, and complete. IF AND WHEN the time comes for you, for any of us, I pray for the same.

Sending (((HUGS))) & PRAYERS,
Monika

Mum2bellaandwilliam said:

Hi Bilie , I watched mum go
Hi Bilie , I watched mum go just before xmas , it was quick because she caught pneumonia , however , it was just like her body slowly shut down piece by piece and in the morning she was trying to communicate with us , however some of what she said did not make much sense, she was in no pain and seemed quite at peace. by the afternoon she was just dozing and when her eyes were open she didn't say much, what she did say was very laboured and we couldn't understand or really hear her, however she still did not seem to be in distress about this.finally a few hours later she just slipped away, it was so peaceful.
The doctors had been talking about her going into cardiac arrest , it just seems such a harsh term , you imagine a big struggle to keep on breathing , ad it being really very distressing to watch.It was really peaceful , I was upset afterwards , I still am now , but it wasn't nearly as bad as I had imagined it could be.
I hope my post helps , I know mums situation is slightly different as it happened reasonably quickly.

Take care, Liz xxx

kellyh33 said:

The last days/weeks.
Hi Billie,
I lost my mom to OVCA in August 2011. My Mom had a wonderful spirit about her and everyone she met instantly liked her.
My Mom had stage 3C. When diagnosed she had already been ill for quite some time. Mom's tumour was inoperable because her cardiac line ran through it.
Mom started chemotherapy June 2010. She tolerated the chemo pretty well although her biggest complaint was nothing tasted right. She had a pretty good summer, fall and the winter was not too bad either but Mom was scared and depressed.
Late winter of 2010 she confided in me she was afraid for spring to come because she didn't think she'd be here. At this point she was doing a clinical trial because the traditional chemo was no longer effective. Chemo was weekly.
Spring 2011 Mom started to lose a pound at each appointment and the oncologist said not to worry unless she lost more then 10% between appointments.
At her April appointment mom was pulled out of the clinical trial because her tumour had grown from 9 cm to 10. She then started doxil. Her first treatment went beautifully, we were optimistic. She felt a little better but she was still incredibly tired. In May we did not notice a change for the better and in June Mom was sleeping more and more. Still no pain. Towards the end of June mom was talking about having a sore throat.
July 16th, I took mom for her chemo appointment and was very upset to learn she had lost 7 lbs. At this point mom was 84 lbs, before she got sick she was 135. I think I knew it was the beginning of the end yet I was in denial. I thought if she would just eat she would put on weight and feel better. While waiting for the oncologist mom began to cry and begged me not to tell the doctor about her throat. I assured her she was probably just harbouring a cold. I now believe Mom was having difficulty swallowing but she didn't want us to worry.
As July progresssed Mom seemed to be a little worse and slept more. I remember my father calling the oncolgist at the end of the month telling her you've got to do something or Sam won't see he Sept 21st birthday. He was right.
At this point mom was put on ringers lactate to help with her nutrional needs. The oncologist agreed to see mom August 5th, three days before her next chemo.
At that appointment the oncologist told mom her time was short, she had a month. Mom decided August 8th to come off the ringers lactate after being told it would only give her a few more days. We supported her decision, this was her life and her body and she didn't have a lot of choices at the very least she should have the right to choose this.
On the 11th the palliative care nurse came to the house to put three tiny needle type things in mom. One on her arm and one on each leg incase she began to experience pain. We gave her the ones in her legs to help with acid reflux (mom had dealt with it her whole adult life), one for hydromorph, which was for pain.
Mom wanted banana popsicles only which we gave her and no food. It was too difficult for her and she had zero desire for it. We were told eating would interrupt the dying process and make it more difficult.
Mom went to meet the angels August 17th at 5:32 in the morning. She passed away in her own bed and never experienced any pain. For that I am greatful.
I hope this is not too much information for you. I have always believed if people ask a question they deserve an honest answer.
On a sidenote when mom's surgery was unsuccessful her oncologist told us 12-18 months and Mom survived 11 1/2 months.

lovesanimals said:

Dear Billie Mimi
Sending you love and prayers.

Kelly