Nov 03, 2011 - 2:15 pm
I definitely am not a strong person clearly because I broke down crying in my sister's car after chemo teaching today. I have never been so scared in my life and even though I have my sister and family I feel so alone. I feel anxious and worried especially about the chemo and what it can do to my body inside. I get the port put in tomorrow. My mum who lives in Maine found out she has stage 4 lung cancer in August and so thats always on my mind too. She is the brave one who calls me to tell me I am going to be ok. She is 78 and the most wonderful woman in the world and I still cant believe she has stage 4 lung cancer. My sister Debbie has been working double time now by going up to Maine to go to doctor visits with my mum and then taking me to all my appts. I just cant seem to get it together and stop being so afraid. The women in my family are definitely the strong and brave and I seem to be the opposite.