NEW what not to say ....

Yup
Some people just don't know what to say, but I blame it on ignorance. They really don't Know much about the illness, even if they’ve had family members diagnosed. This is what I’ve learned about my dx, not to keep things inside. If something bothers you enough, say it. It would teach them a lesson – hopefully – and they won’t do this to another cancer patient again.

Recently I had an ex of mine say to me “I felt so bad for you when you told me”. NO, you do NOT say that to a cancer patient. But they just don’t know.

Keep in mind people are scared of c. And when they hear the word, right away they think “death”. But you can’t be the person responsible to educate them. So please try not to stress it and remember they just don’t know. Deep down they care.

mamolady said:

Some people just aren't
Some people just aren't comfortable with silence, if they were their foot may not end up in their mouth so much.......
Sometimes I wonder if they realize what they said was wrong but they are not sure how to come back from it?

Oh well,
Cindy

it is interesting that this
it is interesting that this person would address this issue though. many comments are aimed a minimizing the illness, or pushing the person to minimize it. However cancer gives us the insight to realize nothing is forever and we should take our opportunities. It is not a death sentence. i am glad to see you withthis fighting attitude you will kick cancer's ****.

Lack of Knowledge
Dear Mary,

Your friend certainly has a lack of real knowledge in regards to cancer. Some type like lungs, liver, some forms of brain cancers do have a very bad prognosis as they are the vital organs. Some have awful prognosis as they are found when the cancer has hit a vital organ such as pancreatic, ovarian, esophagus and many of this sort as there are no symptoms until they metastasize.

No one dies from breast cancer unless it metastasize to a vital organ, brain, liver and lungs. With breast cancer the potential is always there that stage 0-3 will morph to stage IV. However, 70% are treated of stages 0-3 and go on to live a normal life again.

I found it interesting that so many people have so little understand about stages of cancers that it astounded me, still does.

Bucket list, I don't know how old you are, but a bucket list is a pocketful of dreams. Everyone should have one and work on them to make them a reality.

I read your earlier post that you are triple positive, that is very, very good.

Be patient with your friend and tell him a little about cancer. Many, many women with stage IV (the terminal one) go on a live years with the disease. I had widespread lungs and lining metastasis and I am still around, 3+ years later, no worse for wear.

Best wishes on educating your friend and with your treatments,

Doris

MsGebby said:

OH ... it continued. The
OH ... it continued. The next line from him was about natural medicines. B17 to be exact. I blinked really hard. B17 is Laetrile. The treatment Steve McQueen thought was going to keep him around forever.

Some of the things I hear are basic lines, like "Your strong. You will get through this" Those statements come from folks who really don't know what to say. I have a lot of friends who simply ask "how are you feeling?" That's really all anyone needs to say IF they feel the need at all to say anything.

I am fortunate. Most of my friends are quite educated about this subject and know what NOT to say.

Anyway, this guy made me laugh. Ignorance is a disease too!

xoxo
Mary

Curable!
Yes, it is but it's curable!