Ending Radiation

lauragb
lauragb Member Posts: 370 Member
in Colorectal Cancer #1
I have just completed my chemo portion of the neo-adjuvant chemoradiotherapy for rectal cancer. If the machine had not been down for a couple of days, I would have also finished the radiation. I'm supposed to go back for two treatments, on Tuesday and Wednesday. I honestly think my body can't take any more radiation and I want to skip these 2 treatments. At this point, I have diarrhea, nausea, can't eat, pelvic pain, bleeding from the vagina, sores on my anus and can only lie flat to get any relief. I've been this bad for a week. I thought I was bad before but every side effect keeps getting worse. Has anyone else ever said, "I think I've had enough". I can't see myself taking these treatments. I have lost so much weight and none of the dietary suggestions have helped. I want to start healing to prepare for the surgery. Just want to hear your ideas.

Thanks,
Laura

Comments

  • karen40
    karen40 Member Posts: 211 Member
    #2
    I think I've had enough
    Laura,
    Yep,I said it. I did my chemo/radiation after surgery.It wasn't until surgery that I found out my tumor was cancerous. I can relate to your anal sores. I had blisters in and around both my vaginal and anal area, along with hemorrhoids. OUCH,OUCH,OUCH!!! To make matters worse; although not diarrhea, I was having on the average about 20 small bowel movements a day. Again, OUCH,OUCH,OUCH!!! Many times, I was about to throw in the towel. My body would shake on the toilet. Guess what? I never gave into my thoughts and just persevered and so can you. YOU CAN DO IT! Keep in mind,this too shall pass, and it will. It took me a good month to totally heal but you should start to feel better in about two weeks. Once again, YOU CAN DO IT!
    Take care,
    Karen
  • plh4gail
    plh4gail Member Posts: 1,238 Member
    #3
    I knew my last radiation was
    I knew my last radiation was my last. So only did 2 more than you because of mechanical breakdown, not you. I was also feeling everything you are and it took me 3 weeks to recover just from radiation/chemo pump. I would almost bet your tumor is shrunk as much as its gonna and 2 more days might not have any more to shrink. You can say stop. And start to recover now for your surgery to resect the area. Remember it was to shrink the tumor not get rid of cancer, and that is what you have done. Good for you for making it this far!! ON to surgery and more treatment.
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #4
    Dear Laura
    I haven't had radiation, so I can't advise you what I would have done or do in your situation.
    But I will tell you, my heart hurts for your pain, and you have to decide what you can or cannot handle. Never regret your decision, don't look back and say what if, because the what if's don't mean a d@mn thing, your situation is simply, what it is. Your decisions will always be the right decision for you, as long as you carefully thought them out, and felt what you could or could not handle.
    Never feel forced into a corner. Do what you need to do for yourself, you are your own best advocate!!
    Thinking of you,
    Winter Marie
  • John23
    John23 Member Posts: 2,122 Member
    #5
    Laura -

    "plh4gail" gave you some great input!

    Radiation treatments are deadly/damaging to not only
    cancer cells, but to all cells in the surrounding area.

    If you feel you've "had enough", you should listen to your
    body, survival instincts, and basic intuition. Our survival
    instincts can keep us alive and safe, but only when we
    actually heed their warnings!

    Please do not fear having an ostomy. Having the rectum,
    anus, and entire colon removed, may sound like a major deal,
    and hell.... it is. But nothing can remove cancer better than
    surgery. Having an ostomy isn't all that bad, especially when
    you're alive and realizing the alternative that could have been.

    If you decide you need more info regarding an ostomy,
    please ask here, and those of us with a permanent ostomy,
    will give you the input you'll need.

    Best wishes, and good luck!

    John
  • karen40
    karen40 Member Posts: 211 Member
    #6
    I hope your feeling better.
    Laura,
    I hope you're feeling better. I must say that as much as I am one to finish everything I start, whether it be chemo or radiation or the food on my plate,(a personality trait) I do also agree with Gail, Winter Marie and John 23. You must do what is right for you. Whatever decision you make, will be the right one. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
    Take care,
    Karen

    P.S. Something that helped me: I would take several mini-baths through out the day. This not only helped soothe the effected areas (like a sitz bath) but it also helped relax the rest of the body and mind as well. I'd also play relaxing music in the background. I hope this helps.
  • tommycat
    tommycat Member Posts: 790 Member
    #7
    I did 30 rounds of radiation
    I did 30 rounds of radiation and have blocked out how painful it was (remembering now how I cried w/e I had to go to the bthrm). Codeine would help with the pain, BUT make hard dry stools, making a hard situation even more difficult. Ice packs and Destin ointment helped me.
    Also a motto "Months for Years"---reminding myself that I could have some ugly months as a trade off for many beautiful years ahead.
    Hang in there....I am rooting for you!
    Dx 2009
    Stage 3
    Before and After chemo, plus participant in a clinical trial

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