New here, just introducing myself

Hi everyone,

This looks like it's still an active board, so I thought I would join and "meet" a few friends in similar circumstances. I haven't had any luck finding a local face-to-face group yet.

I was diagnosed with grade 1 endometrial cancer on Monday of this week, spent Tuesday in our big teaching hospital's gynecologic oncology clinic. I'm waiting now to hear from the surgery scheduler.

I work in healthcare so probably know more about this than a lot of people do at first, but of course that means I also know more about all the possible complications and problems, not necessarily a good thing.

Monday was a real kick in the teeth, as I had D&C/hysteroscopy last Thursday and got the "all clear" from my GYN after that. Of course, I knew that the path report would be the final say-so, but my GYN was so cheerful I let myself be convinced that the path report would be just a routine rubber stamp. I could tell my GYN hardly knew how to say "it's cancer" when she called on Monday.

So anyway, I had a couple okay days, felt proud that I was coping really well, and you know what they say, pride goes before the fall. Today I'm falling apart and freaking myself out and can't think about anything else. I'm also fat so I feel as if I gave myself this cancer (the gyn/onc practically said so), and it also makes me fear complications of surgery much more.

I will go check out the "my CSN space" options and so forth over the next few days, but for now it sure would help to hear from some women who know what these first few days feel like. Friends and family are trying to be very supportive, but of course they don't know what it's like in the dark all alone thinking about it.

Comments

  • daisy366
    daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458 Member
    Aderyn
    Hearing that initial C-word is totally shocking. I think I was really numb. It's scary to say the least and my life was dramatically changed at that moment. That was 2.5 years ago.

    I've been through alot since then (intial treatment, recurrence and treatment, and disability and retirement as result) and also learned alot - about cancer, myself, my friends and family. I've grown stronger, am continually learning about patience and persistence, when to fight and when to accept. It's all very challenging. Acknowledging and feeling your feelings is healthy. It is all very normal to be scared, angry, regretful, worried, anxious, sad, mad, etc.

    I would encourage you to stay optimistic - don't bury yourself too soon, my friend. Try not to blame yourself either. Many of us get cancer without any risk factors - I think it is an indiscriminant predator - my first doc said it was "bad luck". Educate yourself about your condition. Grade one is very optimistic to me - I have grade 3. There are many treatments available to us. Keep good records (get copies of your records ongoing) and advocate for yourself. Bring someone with you to your appointments who can help ask questions and help remember what was said. Get a tissue assay and hormone sensitivity tests when you have surgery - this will help identify best treatment options.

    I always recommend this book - Getting Well Again by O. Carl Simonton. It will teach you how to participate in your healing and continual wellness in body and mind (so interconnected). There's alot on this site about nutrition and alternative treatments. I believe in and practice both.

    Hang in there. This is a safe place to vent and get support. I hope that I have not given too much "advice" - it has been hard-earned I assure you. In any case I wish many blessings for you,

    Mary Ann
  • Aderyn
    Aderyn Member Posts: 18
    daisy366 said:

    Aderyn
    Hearing that initial C-word is totally shocking. I think I was really numb. It's scary to say the least and my life was dramatically changed at that moment. That was 2.5 years ago.

    I've been through alot since then (intial treatment, recurrence and treatment, and disability and retirement as result) and also learned alot - about cancer, myself, my friends and family. I've grown stronger, am continually learning about patience and persistence, when to fight and when to accept. It's all very challenging. Acknowledging and feeling your feelings is healthy. It is all very normal to be scared, angry, regretful, worried, anxious, sad, mad, etc.

    I would encourage you to stay optimistic - don't bury yourself too soon, my friend. Try not to blame yourself either. Many of us get cancer without any risk factors - I think it is an indiscriminant predator - my first doc said it was "bad luck". Educate yourself about your condition. Grade one is very optimistic to me - I have grade 3. There are many treatments available to us. Keep good records (get copies of your records ongoing) and advocate for yourself. Bring someone with you to your appointments who can help ask questions and help remember what was said. Get a tissue assay and hormone sensitivity tests when you have surgery - this will help identify best treatment options.

    I always recommend this book - Getting Well Again by O. Carl Simonton. It will teach you how to participate in your healing and continual wellness in body and mind (so interconnected). There's alot on this site about nutrition and alternative treatments. I believe in and practice both.

    Hang in there. This is a safe place to vent and get support. I hope that I have not given too much "advice" - it has been hard-earned I assure you. In any case I wish many blessings for you,

    Mary Ann

    NOT too much advice, thank you!
    Mary Ann, DEFINITELY not too much advice! Thank you for responding. Even just reading "2.5 years ago" helps me feel more encouraged. I appreciate your recommendations for reading and will definitely check them out. Thanks for the "indiscriminant predator" description, too -- helps keep me from beating myself up as much.

    Jo Ann
  • susafina
    susafina Member Posts: 131
    Aderyn said:

    NOT too much advice, thank you!
    Mary Ann, DEFINITELY not too much advice! Thank you for responding. Even just reading "2.5 years ago" helps me feel more encouraged. I appreciate your recommendations for reading and will definitely check them out. Thanks for the "indiscriminant predator" description, too -- helps keep me from beating myself up as much.

    Jo Ann

    You have come to the right place
    Hi JoAnn,
    I just want to say welcome to our sisterhood of warriors. I have learned so much from this site. this June will be one year since treatment ended for me. I also have stage 3. Just like all of us here it was a shock to get the diagnosis. I still sometimes don't believe it!
    You are stage 1 that is good. I am also am in the heaalth care field, but believe me I was juast as scared as anyone else to hear the diagnosis. It is a bit overwhelming at times but that is when I turn to this site and immediately feel better. Friends and family try to help but they sometimes are not what to do. Just tell them what you need, because they will be supportive for you.
    Remember that you will get through this. You are so much stronger than you think. You will suprise yourself.
    Ask a lot of questions. Bring a notebook with you. You will hear a lot of information.You can't remember it all. Always bring someone with you to appointments as said before. They will ask the questions that you forgot. You will be presented with a lot options, take your time in making decisions. Forget the idea that you gave yourself cancer. I felt the same way at first but then said allright I will do better from here. remember we are all here for you and in this with you. Post often and let us know how you are doing.Sending much love and hugs.
    SUE
  • Kaleena
    Kaleena Member Posts: 2,088 Member
    Aderyn:
    I too was told that

    Aderyn:

    I too was told that I didn't have cancer, but after my hysterectomy and after my path report came back is when they found it. So I had to have another surgery for staging. It is like being hit by a truck.

    My best advice to you is not to panic. Don't research on the internet. It is really old stuff and not practical in today's world. Keep a positive attitude.

    Think about this (this always kept me going). The week before you found out about cancer, you didn't worry, you were happy, etc. What is the only thing different about this week? It is some report saying you have cancer. Although you still had cancer the week before? Then forge ahead and crush the beast!

    My diagnosis was in September of 2005. Grade 2, Stage ii/iiia endometrial adencarcinoma.

    Sending prayers and positive thoughts to you.

    Kathy
  • Aderyn
    Aderyn Member Posts: 18
    Thank you everyone!
    Funny how good it feels just to have people say "I know what you mean." My family is trying to be supportive but they are very caught up in their own reactions to it. I feel fortunate that I found this active group and will have some people who GET IT to lean on.
  • just another bump
    just another bump Member Posts: 3
    the c word
    I was called at work on mon and had my oncology appt thurs it felt like I had been hit with an atomic bomb. I HAD stage 11B grade 3 uterine and sqamous cells on the cervix. I had radiation every day at lunch 6 weeks w/chemo 1 time a week. This is the good part....5 years ago!!!!
    I am glad I found this spot too, I made the mistake of ignoring me and the HUGE thing I was going thru. I am different now but I did gain alot also. I too was over weight and took the blame. WRONG WRONG be nice to yourself, one of the radiation drs said mom and dad gave each one of us kids(6) certain genes and my 2 cancer genes got together and .... No one in my family had cancer so it's random.I am 58 have not eaten meat since I was 18, made whole wheat bread every week,did not take the birth control pill because of cancer risk, posed for a yoga book when I was 18,am very whole food for all these years and still??? It's another bump in the road(ok a big one) and you are going to do exactly what you need to do to WIN this one and gain a great lesson(I'm still waiting for the lesson on how I do after winning the lottery!)even if wasn't on your wish list.Be good to yourself and remember you don't have to be too brave. I will be back to this site so keep coming I care. Marsha
  • MarieA
    MarieA Member Posts: 18
    Exactly
    I know exactly how you feel, because I was diagnosed on Monday, April 26th. I was numb the first week, started to feel better, and now am a mess. I just found out that the hysterectomy will not occur for another month, and I wanted OUT now!
    I hope all goes well for you! Do you know if Grade of cancer has anything to do with stage?
    I will keep on going forward, what else is there to do.
  • Aderyn
    Aderyn Member Posts: 18
    MarieA said:

    Exactly
    I know exactly how you feel, because I was diagnosed on Monday, April 26th. I was numb the first week, started to feel better, and now am a mess. I just found out that the hysterectomy will not occur for another month, and I wanted OUT now!
    I hope all goes well for you! Do you know if Grade of cancer has anything to do with stage?
    I will keep on going forward, what else is there to do.

    Hi MarieA
    I just responded to your other post. Grade and stage are not related, but grade 1 is the best you can get (so to speak--"best" is NOT the way to describe this). I know what you mean about wanting it out right now; I would have stayed at the hospital the day I met my gyn/onc if he would have admitted me!

    In the other posting I mentioned a book Mary Ann recommended to me. One of the things I like about it is that it talks about actively participating in your treatment, which to me feels better than "just moving forward." I do know what you mean, though -- it is what it is, and all you can do is meet it head-on.