Not the news I wanted to hear.
Pam
Comments
-
Pam
I am sorry the news was not better. I hope the chemo will get those rascals under control. I don't think the chemo regimin you will be on usually results in total hair loss; maybe some thinning. I think that getting started on this plan will help to get you to the next "survival mode", along with time to digest this news.0 -
Pam if you are on folfox should not have major problems withAnneCan said:Pam
I am sorry the news was not better. I hope the chemo will get those rascals under control. I don't think the chemo regimin you will be on usually results in total hair loss; maybe some thinning. I think that getting started on this plan will help to get you to the next "survival mode", along with time to digest this news.
hair just thinning but easy to hide, but don't be concerned about it even if you loose you will get use to that and later it will grow fast and healthier. Beside that the important thing is that chemo cures! and will give you lots of chances to be operated, be sure!.
I pray for an smooth chemo trip but for that must keep a great attitude ,it cures as well!
Take care!0 -
Wanna know the next step to get through survival mode.....?pepebcn said:Pam if you are on folfox should not have major problems with
hair just thinning but easy to hide, but don't be concerned about it even if you loose you will get use to that and later it will grow fast and healthier. Beside that the important thing is that chemo cures! and will give you lots of chances to be operated, be sure!.
I pray for an smooth chemo trip but for that must keep a great attitude ,it cures as well!
Take care!
You have been through every one except for the most important one, most likely the one that will push you through this next stumbling block. That is to get MAD, I don't mean mad, I mean MAD...If you take the opportunity as I have in the last hour or so to really really vent, then you will work yourself up into a fighting mode, thats what eventually will make you a survivor instead of a statistic...I will not let this get me, I refuse to allow this chit get me, I have to be here, and thats the way you should begin this next venue, with a mission in mind.....................buzz0 -
Buzz...since I have been onBuzzard said:Wanna know the next step to get through survival mode.....?
You have been through every one except for the most important one, most likely the one that will push you through this next stumbling block. That is to get MAD, I don't mean mad, I mean MAD...If you take the opportunity as I have in the last hour or so to really really vent, then you will work yourself up into a fighting mode, thats what eventually will make you a survivor instead of a statistic...I will not let this get me, I refuse to allow this chit get me, I have to be here, and thats the way you should begin this next venue, with a mission in mind.....................buzz
Buzz...since I have been on here as of late January, you are the one I watch the most. You are such a pillar of strength and straight up down to earth talk. I am mad...very mad that this stupid thing has literally came out of nowhere and is now trying to wipe out my existance as I know it. And the nerve that it couldn't stop at my colon but had to go on to my liver; and not with just one tumor like it started, but mulitple. I won't lay down and die; I can't...it's not who I am. I won't let it win. My kids need me and I need to be their Mom to the dying end. I WILL beat this. Like Pepe said...bottom line, who cares about losing some hair when my life is at stake?! I'm going to do this Buzz.....with your help and others on this board to cheer me on; I KNOW I can do this. Thank you for always knowing the right thing to say. It's funny that you talking about the difference between a survivor and a statistic; when I asked the Onc today if I was stage IV, he said that statistics made me stage IV but I don't have to be a statistic. I can fight this and change it. That's what I'm going to do Buzz. Thanks for your words of encouragement and please keep being there when I need you. I will be behind you as well, lifting you up.
Hugs,
Pam0 -
Pepe,pepebcn said:Pam if you are on folfox should not have major problems with
hair just thinning but easy to hide, but don't be concerned about it even if you loose you will get use to that and later it will grow fast and healthier. Beside that the important thing is that chemo cures! and will give you lots of chances to be operated, be sure!.
I pray for an smooth chemo trip but for that must keep a great attitude ,it cures as well!
Take care!
You are so
Pepe,
You are so right...what is losing a little hair compared to losing your life?! I'm putting my game face on and forging forward. I'm working on the attitude!
I pray for you and hope all is going well!
Pam0 -
Thanks Anne...I'm feelingAnneCan said:Pam
I am sorry the news was not better. I hope the chemo will get those rascals under control. I don't think the chemo regimin you will be on usually results in total hair loss; maybe some thinning. I think that getting started on this plan will help to get you to the next "survival mode", along with time to digest this news.
Thanks Anne...I'm feeling better about the hair situation and stronger about the real fight. I just have to do this and make up my mind that I'll win this time. Thanks for your encouraging words!
Pam0 -
Sorry
So sorry to hear that you are diagnosed with this and then having to go through chemo. Never lost my hair on Folfox but it did thin out and my hair is thin and not thick either so double whammy for me. But it was ok while going through chemo. Be most careful of cold things while going through treatment. Don't touch or drink anything cold while on oxy and even crying can give you pain. Sorry for the bummer post but it will happen. A lot of has gotten through this and you will too. This is the most scariest part, but you will prevail. Just take one day at a time. Always come here to for your fears, jubliations, concerns and questions. We are a great family and here to help you out.
Kim0 -
So Very Sorry
Oh Pam,
I am so very sorry to hear your results. I know how you feel and it is just like being hit by a train. When my husband, Jimmy, was diagnosed in May of last yr I thought I would never laugh again or be able to listen to music. But thank God life goes on and it does become somewhat normal again. Although, it is a new normal but as long as he feels good and keeps his spirits up we get through it one day at a time.
Jimmy had great hair before all of this happened and he was so upset when it started to fall out but he didn't lose it all. As a matter of fact he had to get a hair cut this morning and he was so excited to make that appt haha.
You will get to the next level of survival mode, with probably a lot of crying in between, but you will get there and when you do you will wonder where you got the strength. It sounds like you have a great family and support system. That is so important. You have the right attitude and that is very important also.
I will keep you in my prayers,
Jan0 -
Pam
I am sorry to hear this news for you. I recently received news of a recurrence and I can tell you that really caught me off guard as I was receiving chemo at the time and didn't expect it. I was so surprised by how hard it hit me. I felt as if I had fallen down that long black cancer tunnel that I fell into when first dx'd. And I had worked hard to get out of that damn tunnel. Unfortunately cancer doesn't play by any set rules and we have to take things as they come. Get mad, get sad and feel the feelings so you can move forward one step at a time and take care of what needs to be done. You will get to that next level of coping because it is something that has to be done. We learn to just do what needs to be done. I think that is a strength that we learn on this journey. I will hope for the best possible results from your chemo plan and keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you work through this. HUGS to you.0 -
Scared is normal
Hey Pam... being scared is totally normal! I would be more concerned if you got this news and you said, "Oh well, no big deal... what's a few treatments?" You have every right to be scared when someone throws news like that at you. You need time to absorb it, turn it around from one angle to another... acknowledge this is not what you wanted to hear but since this is what your doctor told you, what is the best way of approaching it? All of this can take a bit of time and until you have all the answers that make sense in your own mind, then fear and being scared is what fills in the gaps.
The hair thing is really interesting (for anyone who has an interest in psychology ). Like you, I wouldn't say I was vain, and I can't even claim that I have this gorgeous, wonderful hair that I don't want to part with. My natural hair is a she-devil! It has a mind of it's own and whatever I want to do with it, it makes sure it won't act/look the way I planned. So I can't really say there's anything about it that I would really miss... but it WAS a big thing for me. I'm on Irinotecan, which is a different chemo than what you are going to be on... and it is known for hair loss. So I really had to prep myself to accept that "I'm going to lose my hair. I'm going to lose my hair. I'm going to be bald. How am I going to handle that?" I took the bull by the horns and told myself to get it together... this is just a reality and once I've finished the chemo, the hair will grow back in and be as unmanageable as ever. I got myself two really decent wigs for those evenings when I just want to blend in with everyone else. I also got together a lot of caps/hats so I have a selection. All this "prep time" was really just a way of getting me used to the fact it was going to happen and the more prepared I was, the easier it would be when it happened. Well, it did happen and the big surprise for me was, the only person who was concerned about it was ME. Everyone else accepted that hey, there are things that happen when you are on chemo, and they didn't bat an eyelash. I did get comments on my wigs, but more out of "Gee, I had no idea you could do that with that wild hair of yours!" I've now been totally bald (although I do have my eyebrows and eyelashes) for about 6 weeks now... and to tell you the truth, it sure is way easier to manage than when I had the mop that had a mind of it's own
Soooo, I just wanted to give you a first-hand experience of a female going bald. Would I have done anything different, now that I know what it's like. Yes. I would have gotten rid of my hair long before it got to the stage where it was coming out by the handful. That kind of freaked me out... being able to pull out a handful and not feel it come out. Weird and freaky!
Now, having explained all that, I don't think you are going to have to worry. The chemo combo that you are going on is not known for hair loss. Back when I was on it, I did have "thinning"... but it didn't thin in chunks, it was sort of all over thinning, so it was not noticeable to anyone but me and my hairdresser
Instead of hair loss, since you are going to be on the Oxy... what you probably will experience is "sensitivity to the cold". Not only if it's cold outside, or you walk into an air conditioned room... but things like drinking any kind of cold beverage. You will want any drinks to be at room temperature... and that might take some getting used to. Now, once you have the pump taken off, it will just be a day or two and then that cold sensitivity disappears... until the next round of chemo. So to prepare yourself... stock up on beverages (bottled water, bottled juice, whatever things you like to drink) but keep them in a cupboard rather than the fridge. Get a thin pair of gloves to have by the fridge/freezer. Silly as it sounds, you might find you need them just to take something cold out of the fridge or freezer. Depending on the month, you might want to be aware of anywhere that is air conditioned, and avoid these places on your chemo days. (IE: If you need to go grocery shopping, you really will want to avoid the refrigeration/freezer aisles). Actually, I had to avoid going to the grocery stores completely on Chemo days... just walking into the store, the air conditioning of the store would hit me.... whereas normally, I would not even notice that the store was air conditioned.
Anywho, anytime anyone starts chemo, it's a whole new experience... so feel free to ask questions. There are always people who have been through the same chemo who can help with any questions you have
Cheryl0 -
sorry
Hey, Pam.
I'm so sorry about your news. I know it must be scary!
I'm glad you have a friend who is supporting you through this, but I cringe a little every time somebody says that survival depends on the cancer patient's attitude. I feel it puts an unfair burden on the patient. Yes, it makes life more enjoyable for the patient and their loved ones, but sometimes even the sweet ones don't make it, and it wasn't because they weren't peppy enough.
*hugs*
Gail0 -
pamtootsie1 said:sorry
Hey, Pam.
I'm so sorry about your news. I know it must be scary!
I'm glad you have a friend who is supporting you through this, but I cringe a little every time somebody says that survival depends on the cancer patient's attitude. I feel it puts an unfair burden on the patient. Yes, it makes life more enjoyable for the patient and their loved ones, but sometimes even the sweet ones don't make it, and it wasn't because they weren't peppy enough.
*hugs*
Gail
so sorry for this news but if it gives you any comfort i am in your shoes right now.in feb.2011 i had a liver biopsy and i have got 3 spots on my liver and 2 on my lung.just had 1 treatment of folfox+avastin.i too just dont know how to get in the fight mode.having a recuurance is more devistating than original dx for me.i try to take one day at a time.and know every breath i take could be my last.hang in there and feel free to pm me anytime...Godbless...johnnybegood0 -
Gail,tootsie1 said:sorry
Hey, Pam.
I'm so sorry about your news. I know it must be scary!
I'm glad you have a friend who is supporting you through this, but I cringe a little every time somebody says that survival depends on the cancer patient's attitude. I feel it puts an unfair burden on the patient. Yes, it makes life more enjoyable for the patient and their loved ones, but sometimes even the sweet ones don't make it, and it wasn't because they weren't peppy enough.
*hugs*
Gail
When I said attitude
Gail,
When I said attitude is important, I didn't mean the person needed to be "peppy", I meant that Pam has the right attitude because she is determined to fight this monster and I think that is very important!
Jan0 -
Attitudeluvmylife said:Gail,
When I said attitude
Gail,
When I said attitude is important, I didn't mean the person needed to be "peppy", I meant that Pam has the right attitude because she is determined to fight this monster and I think that is very important!
Jan
I'm with you, Jan on this one. Attitude is at least 50% of the battle... and no, "attitude" does not mean waking up in the morning and putting on the "happy face" and showing your family/friends/strangers that you are doing just fine, laughing, and saying "Oh cancer, fiddle-dee-dee... I'll think about you tomorrow. Where's the party today?"
I think a lot of people confuse "having attitude" with "Oh, isn't she/he doing wonderful? Always so happy and jovial. I wish I could be like her/him and I'm not even fighting cancer. She/He has such a wonderful attitude... they are soooo strong!"
But that is not what attitude is. If you are a bubbly, peppy, happy kind of person... then that is your personality. Personality is a good thing and you will attract more people to you if you are a happy, open person, than if you are a grumpy, "I hate life" kind of personality. I'm not sure we have a choice in personality... I think people are who they are and who/what they attract in their life depends a lot on personality.
But ATTITUDE is what drives you. You've heard the phrase, "Gee, she really has a great attitude and away of looking at things!" Attitude is all about how you take on something (good or bad). Example: Your house and all your personal belongs just burnt to the ground. If this happened to you, how would you react and what would you do?
Person A: would go into shock, would be devastated, would be angry, would try and find someone or something to blame for this horrible event in your life. Would be miserable. No matter how many people were there to help you, offering you accommodation, clothing, food and support, you would still be miserable and everyone who was there to help would hear your story about how unfair this is, that you never did anything to deserve this, you don't know what you are going to do now because you don't have the money to rebuild (or if you do have insurance, you will complain that the insurance money will not be enough to build the same kind of house your had, let alone replace everything in it). You get the picture... everything is doom and gloom and it's not going to get any better.
Person B: would go into shock, would be devastated for a day or two, would be angry that this happened but the anger is also because of what the other people in the house lost, more than what you lost. These emotions would change to surprise when family/friends/neighbours came offering support, accommodation, clothing, food, then from surprise to joy and humility that all these people would do this for YOU. You knew you had good family/friends but it may come as a surprise that all your neighbours are there for you too. Out of this tragedy you realize that it's NOT the end of the world and if it wasn't for this fire, you may never have realized just how thoughtful, helpful and supportive your neighbours and strangers really are. Now you look at what you are going to do... well, you've lost EVERYTHING in the fire, so it means starting over, literally from scratch. You realize that maybe you can't replace EVERYTHING you had before in the house, but first, let's find new accommodation, be it to buy again or rent somewhere until you are thinking more clearly and know what you want to buy. Once you have found accommodation, then you know your space and what you need to buy to make this new place a home. If you have insurance, great... that will help ease the financial burden. If you don't have insurance, well, lesson learned... you will make sure you have insurance the next time.... so maybe we will only be able to get the basics in the new place. Then again, all these family/friends/neighbours have offered all kinds of stuff to help us get started. So really... am I not the luckiest person in the world to have such wonderful people in my life? I am feeling so overwhelmed right now... not because the house is gone, but I had no idea I had so much love and support in my life and it's taken this fire and tragedy to show me how rich I am in love.
See the difference between Person A and Person B? These aren't personality traits... it is your attitude in life. Whereas personality can attract people and things to you.... attitude is the driving force in your life and it also is a big magnet. You attract what you put out... and in the tough times in life, ATTITUDE is a huge contributor to how successful you are going to be.
With cancer, Attitude is not going to be the cure. On the other hand... with the meds (alternative or traditional) and knowledge we currently have PLUS one's attitude, you can go a long, long way. If you don't have that driving force, then you are not going to pursue what more you can be doing for yourself, questioning when you have questions, or basically doing anything for yourself other than saying, "It is what it is... there's nothing I can do to stop it". If that is your attitude, then yes, it is what it is and it will probably do what it's going to do without intervention from you for you.
I hope this makes sense.
Cheryl
(who is typing while in a Chemo Fog)0 -
2 for CherylCherylHutch said:Attitude
I'm with you, Jan on this one. Attitude is at least 50% of the battle... and no, "attitude" does not mean waking up in the morning and putting on the "happy face" and showing your family/friends/strangers that you are doing just fine, laughing, and saying "Oh cancer, fiddle-dee-dee... I'll think about you tomorrow. Where's the party today?"
I think a lot of people confuse "having attitude" with "Oh, isn't she/he doing wonderful? Always so happy and jovial. I wish I could be like her/him and I'm not even fighting cancer. She/He has such a wonderful attitude... they are soooo strong!"
But that is not what attitude is. If you are a bubbly, peppy, happy kind of person... then that is your personality. Personality is a good thing and you will attract more people to you if you are a happy, open person, than if you are a grumpy, "I hate life" kind of personality. I'm not sure we have a choice in personality... I think people are who they are and who/what they attract in their life depends a lot on personality.
But ATTITUDE is what drives you. You've heard the phrase, "Gee, she really has a great attitude and away of looking at things!" Attitude is all about how you take on something (good or bad). Example: Your house and all your personal belongs just burnt to the ground. If this happened to you, how would you react and what would you do?
Person A: would go into shock, would be devastated, would be angry, would try and find someone or something to blame for this horrible event in your life. Would be miserable. No matter how many people were there to help you, offering you accommodation, clothing, food and support, you would still be miserable and everyone who was there to help would hear your story about how unfair this is, that you never did anything to deserve this, you don't know what you are going to do now because you don't have the money to rebuild (or if you do have insurance, you will complain that the insurance money will not be enough to build the same kind of house your had, let alone replace everything in it). You get the picture... everything is doom and gloom and it's not going to get any better.
Person B: would go into shock, would be devastated for a day or two, would be angry that this happened but the anger is also because of what the other people in the house lost, more than what you lost. These emotions would change to surprise when family/friends/neighbours came offering support, accommodation, clothing, food, then from surprise to joy and humility that all these people would do this for YOU. You knew you had good family/friends but it may come as a surprise that all your neighbours are there for you too. Out of this tragedy you realize that it's NOT the end of the world and if it wasn't for this fire, you may never have realized just how thoughtful, helpful and supportive your neighbours and strangers really are. Now you look at what you are going to do... well, you've lost EVERYTHING in the fire, so it means starting over, literally from scratch. You realize that maybe you can't replace EVERYTHING you had before in the house, but first, let's find new accommodation, be it to buy again or rent somewhere until you are thinking more clearly and know what you want to buy. Once you have found accommodation, then you know your space and what you need to buy to make this new place a home. If you have insurance, great... that will help ease the financial burden. If you don't have insurance, well, lesson learned... you will make sure you have insurance the next time.... so maybe we will only be able to get the basics in the new place. Then again, all these family/friends/neighbours have offered all kinds of stuff to help us get started. So really... am I not the luckiest person in the world to have such wonderful people in my life? I am feeling so overwhelmed right now... not because the house is gone, but I had no idea I had so much love and support in my life and it's taken this fire and tragedy to show me how rich I am in love.
See the difference between Person A and Person B? These aren't personality traits... it is your attitude in life. Whereas personality can attract people and things to you.... attitude is the driving force in your life and it also is a big magnet. You attract what you put out... and in the tough times in life, ATTITUDE is a huge contributor to how successful you are going to be.
With cancer, Attitude is not going to be the cure. On the other hand... with the meds (alternative or traditional) and knowledge we currently have PLUS one's attitude, you can go a long, long way. If you don't have that driving force, then you are not going to pursue what more you can be doing for yourself, questioning when you have questions, or basically doing anything for yourself other than saying, "It is what it is... there's nothing I can do to stop it". If that is your attitude, then yes, it is what it is and it will probably do what it's going to do without intervention from you for you.
I hope this makes sense.
Cheryl
(who is typing while in a Chemo Fog)
Hi Cheryl!
1) Love this picture of you!
2) I signed up for chemo-fog webcast (sometime in April)But what I am most worried about is whether I will be able to think at all. I work in an office and pretty technical stuff. This chemo-fog - will it turn me into a real blonde-bimbo? or maybe a bald-used-to-be-blonde-but-now-is-worse-blonde-bimbo; does the brain bounce back from this chemo-fog condition or am I going to be unable to perform at my job??
I have preliminary T2-N0 but they haven't done my sigmoidectomy just yet....oh boy! ;-/
Bev0 -
Pam
Hi Pam,
I'm sorry for what you're having to go through- definitely been there, done that.
I don't know of anyone who has lost their hair while on oxaliplatin, 5FU, or Avastin (Folfox). I suppose it is possible, but actually not real likely. I did experience a tingly, sore scalp but did not lose my hair. Most of the colorectal patients who lose hair do so while on Folfiri (which is irinotecan,5FU), although not all even lose it on Folfiri. Mine thinned, but I never actually lost it on Folfiri. I do recall while on Folfox that I had a few weeks of having a lot of loose hairs in my fingers while washing my hair in the shower, but then it stopped and that was that. I know the feeling- I was really worried about that too- didn't want to sound vain, but I also didn't want to have the "cancer tag" of a bald head. If it had happened, of course I would have dealt with it and things would have been okay, but I'm obviously very glad that I never had to deal with it.
So far as attitude, yes- a positive definitely does help. I know that certainly isn't easy or possible all the time, though. Try and surround yourself with positive people, move away from dealing with people who bring you down or give you that "sad face look" every time they see you which makes you think that they think you're doing so poorly.
Be the one to try and show them that you are going be strong throughout this ordeal. Find someone to talk to who you can be completely open with- someone who will boost you up, not bring you down. Also, I found a couple of people from CSN who actually live near me & we met- that was very nice to have that connection- we continue to email, call each other, and meet on occasion when we're able to. It really is nice to meet in person with someone who is going through the same thing (or has gone through it) and truly understands. If you can't find anyone like that, perhaps there is a cancer support group nearby to you. Also- as much as you're physically able to, try and find something to get involved in to make you feel good and also take your mind off cancer. Check w/ your local community center, YMCA, or community college for a fun class to take- maybe yoga, art, music, or whatever you find interesting.
If you're a believer, getting involved in a women's Bible study of some sort could be very good. I know that the ladies in my Bible study are so wonderful for me to meet with.
I draw on my faith in the Lord- although I don't claim to understand the "why bad things happen to good people" dilemma, I do believe that God can turn things for the good. I try to remain positive. I wouldn't say there's anything positive about my actual cancer, but the situation has actually had some outcomes that would have never happened otherwise. For example, I have met many wonderful people and some new friends here on CSN. I became a stay at home mom for the first time (not the way I'd recommend going about doing that, but it happened nevertheless- I've always wanted to be home w/ my kids- now I am and I'm actually still bringing in some income (disability)- we could never have afforded me to be home otherwise. I've had opportunity to meet many new people and share with them. Again, I wouldn't ever say I'm glad I got cancer for these opportunities, but I try to look for silver linings & there have actually been quite a few. It really all is in how you look at things.
If you ever want to talk more, I'd be happy to do so. You can always send me a PM (private message) or just reply.
Take care & I will be thinking of you as you gear up to start chemo (and praying for you, if you don't mind).
Hugs,
Lisa0 -
Attitude, well.....probably you won't be cured with a positiveCherylHutch said:Attitude
I'm with you, Jan on this one. Attitude is at least 50% of the battle... and no, "attitude" does not mean waking up in the morning and putting on the "happy face" and showing your family/friends/strangers that you are doing just fine, laughing, and saying "Oh cancer, fiddle-dee-dee... I'll think about you tomorrow. Where's the party today?"
I think a lot of people confuse "having attitude" with "Oh, isn't she/he doing wonderful? Always so happy and jovial. I wish I could be like her/him and I'm not even fighting cancer. She/He has such a wonderful attitude... they are soooo strong!"
But that is not what attitude is. If you are a bubbly, peppy, happy kind of person... then that is your personality. Personality is a good thing and you will attract more people to you if you are a happy, open person, than if you are a grumpy, "I hate life" kind of personality. I'm not sure we have a choice in personality... I think people are who they are and who/what they attract in their life depends a lot on personality.
But ATTITUDE is what drives you. You've heard the phrase, "Gee, she really has a great attitude and away of looking at things!" Attitude is all about how you take on something (good or bad). Example: Your house and all your personal belongs just burnt to the ground. If this happened to you, how would you react and what would you do?
Person A: would go into shock, would be devastated, would be angry, would try and find someone or something to blame for this horrible event in your life. Would be miserable. No matter how many people were there to help you, offering you accommodation, clothing, food and support, you would still be miserable and everyone who was there to help would hear your story about how unfair this is, that you never did anything to deserve this, you don't know what you are going to do now because you don't have the money to rebuild (or if you do have insurance, you will complain that the insurance money will not be enough to build the same kind of house your had, let alone replace everything in it). You get the picture... everything is doom and gloom and it's not going to get any better.
Person B: would go into shock, would be devastated for a day or two, would be angry that this happened but the anger is also because of what the other people in the house lost, more than what you lost. These emotions would change to surprise when family/friends/neighbours came offering support, accommodation, clothing, food, then from surprise to joy and humility that all these people would do this for YOU. You knew you had good family/friends but it may come as a surprise that all your neighbours are there for you too. Out of this tragedy you realize that it's NOT the end of the world and if it wasn't for this fire, you may never have realized just how thoughtful, helpful and supportive your neighbours and strangers really are. Now you look at what you are going to do... well, you've lost EVERYTHING in the fire, so it means starting over, literally from scratch. You realize that maybe you can't replace EVERYTHING you had before in the house, but first, let's find new accommodation, be it to buy again or rent somewhere until you are thinking more clearly and know what you want to buy. Once you have found accommodation, then you know your space and what you need to buy to make this new place a home. If you have insurance, great... that will help ease the financial burden. If you don't have insurance, well, lesson learned... you will make sure you have insurance the next time.... so maybe we will only be able to get the basics in the new place. Then again, all these family/friends/neighbours have offered all kinds of stuff to help us get started. So really... am I not the luckiest person in the world to have such wonderful people in my life? I am feeling so overwhelmed right now... not because the house is gone, but I had no idea I had so much love and support in my life and it's taken this fire and tragedy to show me how rich I am in love.
See the difference between Person A and Person B? These aren't personality traits... it is your attitude in life. Whereas personality can attract people and things to you.... attitude is the driving force in your life and it also is a big magnet. You attract what you put out... and in the tough times in life, ATTITUDE is a huge contributor to how successful you are going to be.
With cancer, Attitude is not going to be the cure. On the other hand... with the meds (alternative or traditional) and knowledge we currently have PLUS one's attitude, you can go a long, long way. If you don't have that driving force, then you are not going to pursue what more you can be doing for yourself, questioning when you have questions, or basically doing anything for yourself other than saying, "It is what it is... there's nothing I can do to stop it". If that is your attitude, then yes, it is what it is and it will probably do what it's going to do without intervention from you for you.
I hope this makes sense.
Cheryl
(who is typing while in a Chemo Fog)
attitude, but......I'm sure we certainly would die in a pessimistic non fight mode! this is attitude!.
Love&Peace!0 -
Chemo FogOtherShoeFell said:2 for Cheryl
Hi Cheryl!
1) Love this picture of you!
2) I signed up for chemo-fog webcast (sometime in April)But what I am most worried about is whether I will be able to think at all. I work in an office and pretty technical stuff. This chemo-fog - will it turn me into a real blonde-bimbo? or maybe a bald-used-to-be-blonde-but-now-is-worse-blonde-bimbo; does the brain bounce back from this chemo-fog condition or am I going to be unable to perform at my job??
I have preliminary T2-N0 but they haven't done my sigmoidectomy just yet....oh boy! ;-/
Bev
Hahaha Bev!! I'm not laughing at you, but I loved your Chemo Fog explanations.... are you going to turn into a blonde-bimbo or a bald-used-to-be-blonde-but-now-is-worse-blonde-bimbo!! HAHAHAHA!! That is hard to type out!!
No need to fear the chemo fog/chemo brain syndrome. Like chemo side affects, it varies from person to person. And I really do think what you do and how you keep active, plays a huge role at keeping the fog at bay.
For instance, one of the jobs I do is publicist of a local community theatre. With or without chemo brain, I have always put all the tasks/deadlines/media followups, etc. on my iCal on my computer. There are a lot when you are publicizing a season of 8 productions, which run back to back. Obviously, dates overlap, so I can technically be working on three shows at once... and don't ask me why, throughout the year, I will occasionally take on another theatre company's production at the same time. Again, all their dates/deadlines get put on my iCal in a different colour. I KNOW if I didn't do this on a calendar, even without the chemo fog, I would be totally lost and wondering, "What the heck am I suppose to be doing today??"
So, my opinion is... if you are organized, set yourself up with a schedule of what needs to be done when, rather than relying on your brain to remember all the dates/deadlines... then you will be fine. No matter how much I may or may not be suffering from Chemo Fog, it has NEVER affected my work with the theatre... which happens to be the most organized part of my life
Where I will be affected, is in my day to day social life or stuff that needs to be done around the apartment. The other night, I was at a do and this girl came up to me. I KNEW I knew her and that I knew her quite well... but darned if I could think of her name or why I knew her. I thought it would come to me, but it didn't. I finally had to say to her, "I'm sorry... I KNOW I know you, but for the life of me I can't remember your name." She told me... and I don't know who was more surprised... her wondering how I could not know her name or me because once she told me her name, it all came rushing back. This was a gal who was an actress and really gave the theatre grief over a couple of incidents when she was in one of the shows... to the point the theatre doesn't want her back. I seriously did not remember any of this or her... until she told me her name and then of course I remembered everything. How embarrassing is that??
But my actual work as a publicist... no problems there and believe me, I am super busy these days (we have the Musical, 42nd STREET opening this weekend
Hahaha... thanks for the comments on the photo! I was at the most magical evening of theatre on Sunday. We were celebrating World Theatre Day and had this wonderful event where we had retired professional performers who are all now in their 60s, 70s, 80s and one in her 90s along with the newest generation of young performers. A bunch of them would go up and tell the story about the first Musical they remember, then they'd sing a song from it. Pure magic and talent... and I was in my element as the photographer for the night. So one of my friends took my camera and took a picture of me
Which is the picture in my profile now
Cheryl0 -
dear pam what lousy news
On the brightside your here. Many seasoned veterans can give you support, they have been there and doing that for years and years. I hope you do as well.
Everyday we are in survival mode, even those without cancer, they are just blissfully unaware of it. Now we are fully aware of how precious our lives are. I am and I thank god its not gone to my liver or else where. I fill my day with enjoyable positives where possible and a few preventitive things.
Its only a suggestion but discussing your feelings here or to a counsellor ( which I did ) was really helpful.
all the best ,
Pete0 -
Pam.......You just remember to stay focused on winning...pete43lost_at_sea said:dear pam what lousy news
On the brightside your here. Many seasoned veterans can give you support, they have been there and doing that for years and years. I hope you do as well.
Everyday we are in survival mode, even those without cancer, they are just blissfully unaware of it. Now we are fully aware of how precious our lives are. I am and I thank god its not gone to my liver or else where. I fill my day with enjoyable positives where possible and a few preventitive things.
Its only a suggestion but discussing your feelings here or to a counsellor ( which I did ) was really helpful.
all the best ,
Pete
and never concede to second.......You will be fine......one foot in front of the next and it will be behind you before you know it......stay focused on the end result, and adamant of the outcome.........love to you, buzz0
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