chemo every 5 weeks ...

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luvmum
luvmum Member Posts: 457 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Dear all,

I know as a caregiver, I really shouldn't complaint. Like Bobby, I'm now in one of my lowest days... I even though of dying with my mum. I'm very tired, exhausted and feeling very down.

My mum has IV, non-operable liver met, plus KRAS-mutated. To make her situation worse, she has the worse side effects patients could have! Her first chemo treatment was on 26 Nov 2011, because of the extremely severe non-stop diarrhea, she was in the hospital for 9 days! She supposed to have her 2nd treatment on 17 Dec, and because of the diarrhea, the onc postponed the treatment to 3 Jan and 10 Jan 2011. There is a 5 weeks gap between 1st and 2nd treatment! After her 2nd treatment on 3 and 10 Jan, diarrhea again... and hospital again... She supposed to have her 3rd treatment today, but the onc said, she is too weak to have it! Therefore, 3rd treatment is scheduled on 10 Feb. There is another 4 weeks gap between 2nd and 3rd treatment. The onc said, according to CEA, her response to the treatment is lowering. =*(

I'm so worried, I think in 3 months time, many people will have 5-6 rounds of treatments already, and my mum only has 2 or 3. What if the cancer get used to the treatment, what if they grow, during this long break? I'm so scared.

To make the situation worse, she is so scared to eating and drinking now... whatever she eats or drinks, that induce diarrhea. I have never seen her this skinny in my life. She looks very weak, skinny, pale. My mum used to swim and walk faster than me! Seeing her suffering really break my heart.

My dad went to see this doctor this afternoon and the doctor suspected he has a tumor in his tummy and refer him for a colonscopy and CT scan on Friday. I'm so scared... he can't be sick now... I would trade my health with them. I would rather be the one who is suffering all these.

I pray day and night for their health, for my mum's recovery...
Dora

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  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #2
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    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • pete43lost_at_sea
    pete43lost_at_sea Member Posts: 3,900 Member
    #3
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    Dear Dora
    Thanks for sharing your feelings.

    Sorry about your mums chemo side effects and now your dad possible problems.

    You have to look after yourself number one.

    For a start if your parents see you being down and worried they will worry. Which is really bad for their immune system.
    So be positive and constructive with your time and effort to help them.
    Make you have some solid support for you as a primary carer you need it.

    If you don't look after yourself, you won't be able to look after them.
    Often cancer is harder on the carer than the patient.

    love,
    pete
  • luvmum
    luvmum Member Posts: 457 Member
    #4
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    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    Dear Graci
    I also do not understand why they cannot control my mum's diarrhea. They only prescribe lomotil, spasmomen and smecta for her. When I said they, I actually refer to 4 doctors!!!! One onc, one colon surgeon, plus two specialists. They just keep saying that my mum's colon is very sensitive and they 'suspected' the wall of her colon is peeling like her hands and foots.

    Yes at one point, we were considering changing the onc, but the situation here is very complicated. We have public hospital and private clinics and hospitals here in Hong Kong. For public hospital, the environment could be really poor, such as grumpy nurses, long waiting time, poor and small waiting area. For private hospital and clinic, you pay for everything, so the environment of course will be a lot better. However, for private ones, sometimes, the onc will after the money and they tend to give you chemo no matter what, till the day you leave this world.

    When we were thinking of changing the onc, we had 2 options. 1, to go to a very caring, smart and good oncologist who works in public hospital but will have maternity leave from Feb till July 2011. 2, go to another private onc, but after gathering information from others doctors and patients, this private onc was not an option because he can be very very aggressive and not following the protocol. In the end, we stick to the private one we are seeing. At least he is honest, and he doesn't after the money. There are really not many good oncologists here in Hong Kong unfortunately.

    Thank you so much for your support. I need it badly!
    Love from Dora
  • luvmum
    luvmum Member Posts: 457 Member
    #5
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    pete43lost_at_sea said:

    Dear Dora
    Thanks for sharing your feelings.

    Sorry about your mums chemo side effects and now your dad possible problems.

    You have to look after yourself number one.

    For a start if your parents see you being down and worried they will worry. Which is really bad for their immune system.
    So be positive and constructive with your time and effort to help them.
    Make you have some solid support for you as a primary carer you need it.

    If you don't look after yourself, you won't be able to look after them.
    Often cancer is harder on the carer than the patient.

    love,
    pete

    Dear Pete
    Thanks a lot for your support.

    I know I should take care of myself. I do, I eat and sleep enough to make sure I have enough energy. I just don't know why I will lose weight and my mum keeps saying I look pale and skinny too. =( I try to eat a lot to make sure I'm still my mum's chubby daughter. =*(

    I pray every day and night and hope to see miracle happens.

    I sincerely hope you cope with this round's FOLFOX really well! Thank you so much for your support despite you just had your treatment not long ago!

    Best wishes and love,
    Dora
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #6
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    luvmum said:

    Dear Pete
    Thanks a lot for your support.

    I know I should take care of myself. I do, I eat and sleep enough to make sure I have enough energy. I just don't know why I will lose weight and my mum keeps saying I look pale and skinny too. =( I try to eat a lot to make sure I'm still my mum's chubby daughter. =*(

    I pray every day and night and hope to see miracle happens.

    I sincerely hope you cope with this round's FOLFOX really well! Thank you so much for your support despite you just had your treatment not long ago!

    Best wishes and love,
    Dora

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

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