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Climbing out of the valley!

steve714's picture
Posts: 15
Joined: Feb 2010

Hey all! 2010 will go down as a strange year. During my anual physcial, the Dr found a mass near my anus. I had myself convinced it was an external hemroid. Well it was not. 1/29 I had surgery to have it removed. What a pain in the *** (lol I know I'm sorry) that was! Took about 2 weeks to recover. Then the surgen sent me to the oncloigest. I was expecting to get a clean bill of health from him. Instead I heard words like chemo and rad. And was told if I did'nt get these treatments, I could look forward to pooping in a zip lock bag attached to my hip! I cried on the drive home. Well I worked with the chemo and rad Drs and set up treatments. I had a port put in my chest so I wouldn't have to get stuck for an IV every time. On 3/16 I got a "chemo ball" and had the chemo drugs pumped into me 24/7 for 5 days. I had no real side effets during this time and remember thinking that maybe this wasn't going to be so bad after all.( ha ha joke was on me) The following monday I got set up and started my rad treatments. About mid week I started to feel poorly. Had nausa and dry heaves in the am, and my mouth was starting to swell up and I was losing my ability to taste. It took all my energy just to go from the bed to the bathrom. It kinda felt like a very bad flu. Well. it got worse ( a lot worse) I could not eat,drink or take my meds. The Dr put me in the hospital for several days to give me fluids and pain relief. I was so sick I didnt remember a lot about that stay. When I got sent home, I still felt very sick and could not eat ( I lost about 25# in a couple of weeks.) This lasted a couple more weeks and slowly I stared to feel better and could finally eat! I contiued with my rad and in the mean time the chemo Dr cancelled my second round (he was afraid I would not make it through a second round). I had my last "wide angle" rad treatment today and will begin 6 tageted rad treatments tom. But of course today when I got back from my rad treatment I had a bowel movement that felt like I pooped a 2x4. The pain was easily a 10 and burns severly. Dr is getting an RX for me.(but now I'm scared to death to poop again). So, if the pain meds work, I wiil go back to rad in the morning. I have only gained back 2# and only part of my taste is back. I am tired and still a little scared . But still I feel a lot better than a month ago. Yet, I am also starting to feel happy again and can see the light at the end of the tunnel! I want to thank ALL of you who comforted me, gave me advice, and shared your stories. It has been great comfort eapecially at 2am when I was in pain and panked a little. If I can help anyone on here please let me know and don't be afraid to ask me anything! Good luck to all of you and I hope to hear more from you. (Almost) a cancer survivor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Steve

mp327's picture
Posts: 4143
Joined: Jan 2010

I have wondered about you many times and was hoping to hear from you one of these days. I'm sorry you have had such a rough time of it, but you are almost to that finish line, so hang on and you'll make it! No one can really accurately describe the pain to someone who hasn't felt it for themselves. I know the 2X4 BM, although I likened mine to pooping razor blades. I hope your doctor can give you something to ease your pain. Keep asking until you find something that helps. It's great that we have this site to talk about these things--things that most people just wouldn't understand. I'm glad you have felt supported here and I hope that we can continue to give you support once your treatment ends. As you know, that really is only the beginning. Take care and keep us posted on how those last few treatments go. May God bless.

cbs6931's picture
Posts: 63
Joined: Mar 2010

Congrats on getting through everything (almost!)- you definately had a go of it - was glad to see your post and also wondered how you'd been doing. I've been through two weeks now and things are slowly getting better. Also know the 2x4 feeling - makes you scared to eat solid food - know I gave it up several times. Stool softeners are a good thing, definately better if things are a little loose than too solid. Hang in there you are almost finished!


z's picture
Posts: 1411
Joined: May 2009

Hi Steve,

I'm glad your almost done. I had the same experience with bms. It felt like glass coming thru. I took a pain pill 4 times a day and used the water bottle just to sooth the area while going. Just know that it will certainly get better after tx is over. I wish you well Lori.

Posts: 1
Joined: May 2010

Hi steve,
I wish I had joined in on this network along time ago. I do not know why today (3 years after) I decided to participate.... I had an agressive form of anal/ rectal melanoma (the Farrah Fawcett cancer). I too was in the hospital at the end of my first chemo...in a coma and I actually died once. I cannot talk very long due to having to run to my part time job. Hang in there...I did have my colonoscopy last month and it was clean. I wish you all the best. we will talk again soon. Alive in Las Vegas...

Posts: 300
Joined: May 2010

Wow...am happy to hear you are climbing up the valley. It sounds like you had a rough going of it but the end result appears to be worth it. I am so new to all of this. I was only told a few days ago that I have squamous cell cancer but do not know anything else. Found it when they did a hemorrhoid surgery - meeting with another surgeon next week as I do not think they removed it all. So...I'm just starting out and reading as much as I can on these sites. Continue to be well and share your story...Marlyne

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