How many of you gals do this when you're in a crowd?

I use to think the same as
I use to think the same as you, never seeing any bald heads and all. Then we had a family event and I looked around and suddenly realized that within my family we 8 of us who have survived either breas, prostrate, ovarian and bladder cancer over the last 10 years. A club I belong to holds another 6 survivors all of various cancers. I never realized how many people I know have experienced this journey. I found strength in their victories. Then one day when I was at the grocery store I noticed a very young woman with her husband and small son shopping. Low and behold she was wearing a pretty scarf and had no hair! It felt pretty good seeing someone else (outside of the oncologist waiting room) who chose not to wear a wig just as I did picking through the produce. When we looked at each other we gave a smile and continued our shopping. I think that is when it hit me, there are others just like me!
What your feeling is okay, and this was not a pitty party at all; the end of chemo brings many differnt feelings and a lot of questions. God Bless

Glad you vented
Hi Mama G,

You are so right! But, yesterday I was out at a restaurant and 2, yes 2, women with wigs on, laughing away at a table. Hope something like that happens to you too!
I'm sorry you're starting to worry about the BC returning. I hope you have a support group you can express this fear with. If not, of course, share it here all you want. You are not alone in your fear.
Hugs, Sally

you are SO right!
When I first started sheding my hair, I went ahead and shaved my head. My beautician opened the shop on a Sunday afternoon so I wouldn't have to have my head shaved in front of the other customers. The day before my haircut, my son came over to show me his new haircut--he had shaved his head for me. When I came home after my "new haircut" the next day, my husband had shaved his head too! Made me laugh and cry at the same time. I started out wearing a wig to work (I teach 5th grade) but this week I started wearing scarves. They are so much more comfortable! The student and faculty are so supportive and sweet. Will take it one day at a time and see how things go as to whether I'll continue to work. You are so right about not seeing hardly any baled women or any wearing scarves. I go for my 2nd chemo Friday. I go every 3 weeks for chem (taxotere & cytoxan) which last 6 hrs. then I go weekly for the herceptin which lasts about 1 hr. How about you. Which chemo are you taking. Side effects? I had bad headaches, reflux, and feel flu-like. Dr. gave me something for headaches and reflux and feeling better. Usually don't stay up this late-gotta go to work tomorrow so I had better get to sleep.

hair
when you look in the crowed, you looking for what is on the outside not the inside. alot of us wear wigs

Not all are as brave as you are...
Many wear wigs when they venture out. But, from my experience (I HATED a wig...wore scarves and hats, along with a pink ribbon pin), I stirred many a pot...people approached ME, telling me stories about their experiences, or asking 'what should I do, my friend has cancer', or just wishing me well...

It's just part of the living of life, I guess. And, if you REALLY want to be inspired, attend a Susan Komen event...I walk one every year...we survivors are given a pink bead strand for each year since diagnosis...I always seek out the ones with full necks, it's interesting to hear the difference in treatment options 'back then'.

Hugs to a very brave warrior!

Hugs, Kathi

I Look at Breasts
I do notice bald heads, but because I had double a bilateral mastectomy, I look at breasts all the time. Can't keep my eyes off them. If I catch someone watching me, I explain that I had a double mastectomy. The person is always sympathetic and understanding. In fact, I generally make them laugh.

Worry is negative, not good - not good for body and mind. If you find yourself worrying, focus on something else. I taught myself not to worry when I was a teenager. Generally I worried when I was sitting down, sometimes watching TV. When I recognized that I was worrying, I got up and started to do something until the worry left my mind because I had to concentrate on what I was doing. Every time I started to worry, I did what I have just described. It probably took me a year, which means by the time I reached 17 years old, I no longer worried about anything, and still don't. I don't know if this could help you.

POSITIVE - POSITIVE - POSITIVE - POSITIVE.

Fondly,
Janelle

TLynn0102 said:

One last thought on hair
My brother in law (God bless him) found a shirt that he wore while I went through chemo. Now to set the tone: he's sort of in shape (okay, the beer belly has its downside), his head is shaved but he has a 12" pony tail....yes pony tail or the remains of what use to be a mullet cut in the 80's...and is very loud when he speaks.Anyway his shirt read "With a body like this who needs hair!" The first time I saw it I thought if only he would have not cut the sleeves off the shirt...I could wear that and made it look good! :-)

LOVE the shirt!!!!
It inspires me to check out having one printed!!!

Hugs, Kathi

Mama G said:

THank you almost3 for coming on just to post that for me
I got tears in my eyes when I read that. Thank you everyone for the positive outlook you all have. It's contagious! I love coming on here to catch it every night.

God bless us everyone!

Im so sorry you are feeling
Im so sorry you are feeling that way....but its normal, I worry almost everyday and then realize I must try and put it out of my mind, its nothing that I can effect the outcome of so I just pray that I never face cancer again.
As far as looking for others that have no hair, my hair has started to grow back now, but last yr at this time I had no hair, I wore a wig sometimes but mostly hats because it was cold here (WI) It wasnt that I notice how many people didnt have hair but there was always some reminder (a breast cancer pin, a pink bracelet) something that made me realize HOW MANY women face this battle and it makes me cry. And now Ive had the bilateral so now just as the other poster here, I look at boobs. All I can say is I hope that it gets easier as time goes by. Im still tired but its getting easier.
My mother passed from ovarian cancer when I was 8, it was 1965 and when I remember her I remember her pain from radiation and all that she went thru and am thankful that the options have improved so greatly in my lifetime.
hugs to you

padee6339 said:

Me too
I was having lunch with a co-worker at Panero Bread one day when a woman walked by with what looked like a buzz cut, associated with the first growth of hair after chemo. I wanted so much to talk to her but then thought, what if? What if she just wears her hair like that? Then I thought - mind your business Pat. I don't like to insult people over hairstyles. LOL

I have a wig but dont wear
I have a wig but dont wear it much have not felt well enough. I thought the scarf would make me self concious but i dont pay attention anymore. I thought when I felt better I would wear the wig more but who knows. I dont look for other bald heads, but I do notivr breasts and miss them. but the sensible part of me knows they were going to kill me. The reconstruction process would be more than I would want to take on. as the expander route is out. I do notice breasts especially because people wear very revealing clothes, but even whe.n I had my nice breasts i did not dress like that. besides after breast feeding they didnt look so hot anyway. lol