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How do I accept the fact that my mom is dying???

Posts: 1
Joined: Oct 2009

I am fairly new at this discussion board but I am desperate and I need help.

My mom has been diagnosed with Cancer of Pancreas that has spread to her Liver. She is Stage 4. She has been given by the doctors in the Philippines 2-3 months to live.

I am having a hard accepting this fact and I need help to accept this. I have been crying and crying. I haven't had any sleep. I can't accept the fact that my mom is dying. I haven't seen her yet, but may family and friends have said that she doesn't look fine.
My family and friends keeps saying 'be strong' and 'be ready' how am i suppose to do that? How could I be strong when I'm losing the most important person in my life? How could I be ready to accept that my mom is dying? please help me.

Posts: 20
Joined: May 2009

Contact pancan.org or the Johns Hopkins pancreatic cancer discusssion board. There you will find lots of people willing to give you advice. Many are undergoing chemo and/or radiation for their pancreatic cancer. You can read many success stories. PC is a terrible disease, but each case is different as is each outcome. Try to spend as much time with your Mom as you can. I'm sure you will be a comfort to her. There are some great pancreatic doctors and hospitals in the U.S. PANCAN can name them for you.

mrsgeb's picture
Posts: 32
Joined: Oct 2009

it when someone you love is dying...you make peace with it, for the person, your Mom, and for yourself. It is the most diffcult thing you will ever do, but you need to for your Mom's sake and for your own.

My prayers are with you and yours during this difficult time and I will pray that you will make your peace with this so that you can spend time with your Mom in peace.

Joys Network
Posts: 6
Joined: Jan 2010

There is nothing that prepares you for the loss of your mother. All you can do is feel how you need to feel, and cry when you need to cry. She is worth all the tears you shed. Acceptance is a process and it takes time. You will get through it, but it's tough. Losing a mother is one of the most profound of losses and it changes life as you know it. The one thing that has helped me through the loss of my mom, is keeping her memory alive in my heart and living my life in a way she would have been proud of. I visit her grave often and talk to her all the time. You will find your way. Be gentle with yourself and lean on others when you need to. She won't be with you in the physical sense but she will live in your heart forever.

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