Inspiration Photo w/Message

Hi Sisters,

I have added a photo to my expressions page.
It is a photo I took of my daughter the day after my first chemo.
I wanted to share the story with you.

It was a local children's marathon. My daughter was not yet 5, although since she was nearing the age of 5, my Mom had inadvertently registered her in the 5 year age race. It was much longer than the 4 year old marathon and, the girls were much bigger and stronger.

Since this was within 1 1/2 wks of my diagnosis, I had many inner struggles about my children and..."what would happen to them" if things didn't work out the way I wanted them to. As I watched "life" around me, and wondered how long I would have to watch it, I recall this weighing on me heavily while we were at this marathon.

The race started and my daughter kept with the pack as long as she could. We snapped some photos of her with the pack mid-way through the race and she was strong, intent and focused. I cut over the track to the finish line to capture her finishing. I kept waiting...and waiting...and waiting.

Finally, only after most of the other girls had completed, my daughter emerged.
Clenched fists, eyes welling with tears, face flushed and hardly able to run...she pushed through the finish line - exhausted.

She could have quit...many children had.
She could have stopped & walked...but she trudged forward.

The weight of my worries about what would happen to my daughter if I weren't here were lifted. I had my answer. She will be fine.

When I finally was able to get with her, I said, "Honey, why are you crying" and she said, "Mommy, I'm a loser, all the other girls finished before me." Tears welled in her eyes. Tears welled in my eyes. I explained to her how proud I was of her for finishing and that she could never, ever be a loser because no matter how hard it was, she did not quit.

In the days that passed, whenever it felt like I just couldn't do another moment of this cancer...this treatment...this unexpected turn in life...I look at that photo. Her intensity to preserve and finish drives me.

AND...the most amazing part of this story is...
On one of those days, when I reflected to this photo for strength, I noticed that DIRECTLY above her head is a cross. During the most difficult moment in my 4 year old's life, she was not alone.

And...again...The weight of my worries about what would happen to my daughter if I weren't here were lifted. I had my answer. She will be fine.

INSPIRATION:
In those moments that feel like they will never, ever end, even as little girls, we had it in us to push forward and finish...and...we are never alone while we are pushing.

Hugs and Blessings to All,
KC