Drug reactions

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dmc_emmy
dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
This is my first time to ever enter a discussion about my cancer, but I'm desperate now and would like some feedback from fellow survivors. I've never joined a support group, because I am a very private person and just don't think I could share my life with others face-to-face.

Sorry for the long-winded email. I guess I needed to share. I suppose I should have done this a long time ago.

I am a 3-year survivor, but I was never given temoxafin because I am prone to blood clots. I was given arimadex, but I suffered from severe joint pain after only a few months. I then given femara on a 3-month on/2-month off regiment so I could deal with the side effects. I stopped this about a year ago and started to take it regularly. Over the past several months, I have noticed an increase in anxiety, neuropathy, insomnia (such as tonight), weight gain (in spite of exercise), mood swings, depression, night sweats, lack of appetite, and pain. I can deal with all of these, except the depression. My relationship with my 21-year daughter is deteriating and I am no longer the mom I use to be. I decided to stop the femara again, until the Fall and, at that time decide if I want to return to it or stop it all together. I feel as though I would rather take a chance with the cancer than battle the daily physical and emotional side effects of this drug.

I know I have a good deal of stress in life, but I've had stress before and dealt with it, but I feel as though I am out of control and always on the verge of tears. I'm terrified of getting cancer again, but I'm also afraid of losing control of myself. My daughter's and my relationship is more precise to me than my longevity.

My parents, now in their mid-to late 80s, and I just had a long distance spat and I my mother haven't spoken in two weeks (I always called once or more a week just to talk). This is not helping my anxiety over-load. I lost my pup a year ago this coming July at 10 months due to a neurological disorder and my husband and I almost called it quits last December (he's deaf and blind). Well, I got a new pup and she's a sweetheart and my husband and I are back to feeling like newly-weds (well,not quite). However, my parents told it may be better to just email and last was the last time we chatted (by email or phone). I'm not dealing with this well at all.

Is anyone else having these kind of challenges with their meds, or am I just losing it and need to seek professional help?
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Comments

  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
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    welcome
    I am fairly new here too, and the first thing I noticed is that I was welcomed with open hearts. Whatever questions or concerns you have, you now have a whole group of people caring and encouraging you every step of the way.
    I'm sorry, I cannot relate to any of your questions or concerns, but I know soon you will have lots of replies and helping suggestions.
    Take care of you
    Cat
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
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    cats_toy said:

    welcome
    I am fairly new here too, and the first thing I noticed is that I was welcomed with open hearts. Whatever questions or concerns you have, you now have a whole group of people caring and encouraging you every step of the way.
    I'm sorry, I cannot relate to any of your questions or concerns, but I know soon you will have lots of replies and helping suggestions.
    Take care of you
    Cat

    You sound like a lot of the
    You sound like a lot of the women here that are taking the hormone therapy, so, you are not alone. Many have side effects and many have exactly what you are describing. So, you are not alone and you are not losing your mind. I haven't been on hormone therapy yet and probably won't as I want a quality life, not a quantity life with awful side effects. Several here will reply to you and tell you that it is or could be the meds, not just you. I am sorry you are having these problems. I wish you the best! Please consult with your oncologist and let them know as soon as possible.
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
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    Warm welcome, dmc_emmy!
    Greetings, and welcome! Though sorry for the reason. I joined this amazing group just last month. Am an almost 6 year survivor. This is also my first support group, and first on-line networking forum. We are all here to help & share, support & encourage.

    So sorry about your hardships with the meds. I took Tamoxifen for 2 years - NO side effects, whatsoever. Coulda been a placebo, for all I knew. Now taking Arimidex, 3+ years and still counting. Totally different experience. For me - yeah, the side effects are really crappy. But, more annoying and frustrating than debilitating.

    It's obvious you love your daughter very much. Your only child? 21 and still living at home? My sister's older daughter moved out when she turned 21. Was very hard, hurtful, for both of them. Two years later, they're just beginning to put the pieces of their relationship back in place. My sister had to adjust to not being needed as the mom she had been, and my niece had to adjust to not needing her mom in the same ways. I mention this only because I'm not sure if you can totally blame your cancer for the current stresses you're going through with your own daughter. 21 can be a difficult time - certainly no longer a child; but, maybe not quite ready to become an independent adult? I don't know, I'm just wondering...

    Families. We love 'em. But, sometimes they can make us nuts. Right? My own parents are aging. Already, the tables are turning. I feel like they need me to "parent" them. This is just life, as it goes along. Truly, I always wish that for all of us - cancer would simply be "enough" for the rest of our lives. Unfortunately, this is not possible, not reality. We are not spared additional bumps in the road of life. Although it might make you sad, maybe take a little break from your own parents. Contact them when YOU are ready, when you feel strong enough.

    As a crazy dog lover myself - I am so, so sorry you lost your young puppy. However, I'm also glad you now have another pup who obviously brings you joy. Glad, too, you & your husband managed to work things out.

    Yes, we all face challenges similar to yours at the moment. There is certainly no shame in seeking help from the professionals.

    I'll be hoping you get some relief, some how, some way. Joining this group is a great start. Because you will soon know that you are most certainly not alone.

    With best wishes, and...

    Kind regards, Susan
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
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    Warm welcome, dmc_emmy!
    Greetings, and welcome! Though sorry for the reason. I joined this amazing group just last month. Am an almost 6 year survivor. This is also my first support group, and first on-line networking forum. We are all here to help & share, support & encourage.

    So sorry about your hardships with the meds. I took Tamoxifen for 2 years - NO side effects, whatsoever. Coulda been a placebo, for all I knew. Now taking Arimidex, 3+ years and still counting. Totally different experience. For me - yeah, the side effects are really crappy. But, more annoying and frustrating than debilitating.

    It's obvious you love your daughter very much. Your only child? 21 and still living at home? My sister's older daughter moved out when she turned 21. Was very hard, hurtful, for both of them. Two years later, they're just beginning to put the pieces of their relationship back in place. My sister had to adjust to not being needed as the mom she had been, and my niece had to adjust to not needing her mom in the same ways. I mention this only because I'm not sure if you can totally blame your cancer for the current stresses you're going through with your own daughter. 21 can be a difficult time - certainly no longer a child; but, maybe not quite ready to become an independent adult? I don't know, I'm just wondering...

    Families. We love 'em. But, sometimes they can make us nuts. Right? My own parents are aging. Already, the tables are turning. I feel like they need me to "parent" them. This is just life, as it goes along. Truly, I always wish that for all of us - cancer would simply be "enough" for the rest of our lives. Unfortunately, this is not possible, not reality. We are not spared additional bumps in the road of life. Although it might make you sad, maybe take a little break from your own parents. Contact them when YOU are ready, when you feel strong enough.

    As a crazy dog lover myself - I am so, so sorry you lost your young puppy. However, I'm also glad you now have another pup who obviously brings you joy. Glad, too, you & your husband managed to work things out.

    Yes, we all face challenges similar to yours at the moment. There is certainly no shame in seeking help from the professionals.

    I'll be hoping you get some relief, some how, some way. Joining this group is a great start. Because you will soon know that you are most certainly not alone.

    With best wishes, and...

    Kind regards, Susan

    I really hate to say this.....
    I really hate to say this but, My mum and I havn't got on since I was 14 (48 now) BUT when I got diagnosed with this she was the GREATEST!..She flew over here to Canada on her own aged 70 last year and I was just sooooo proud of her........when she got here she took charge (Dusting, Cleaning, Sorting people out) She was Brilliant!
    My Husband was suffering from Pneumonia when she arrived and she just took over the running of the house..........
    I am so proud of her, it was the first time she ever flew alone, and she made it!!!!!!!!!! she was so super confident when she arrived that she flirted with my husband from across the airport lounge, waving to him, blowing kisses to him....wriggling her hips.......

    The only problem was........That was NOT my husband...The guy looked so embarassed.

    She screamed with laughing when she realised........ All Canadian men look the same
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
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    tasha_111 said:

    I really hate to say this.....
    I really hate to say this but, My mum and I havn't got on since I was 14 (48 now) BUT when I got diagnosed with this she was the GREATEST!..She flew over here to Canada on her own aged 70 last year and I was just sooooo proud of her........when she got here she took charge (Dusting, Cleaning, Sorting people out) She was Brilliant!
    My Husband was suffering from Pneumonia when she arrived and she just took over the running of the house..........
    I am so proud of her, it was the first time she ever flew alone, and she made it!!!!!!!!!! she was so super confident when she arrived that she flirted with my husband from across the airport lounge, waving to him, blowing kisses to him....wriggling her hips.......

    The only problem was........That was NOT my husband...The guy looked so embarassed.

    She screamed with laughing when she realised........ All Canadian men look the same

    You're a scream!
    Tasha,
    That is way too funny!!I'm reading along and feeling compassionate,and all of a sudden you throw that out!It's great that you can bring your gift of humor in to make us all feel better and get a good healthy laugh!
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    Options
    tasha_111 said:

    I really hate to say this.....
    I really hate to say this but, My mum and I havn't got on since I was 14 (48 now) BUT when I got diagnosed with this she was the GREATEST!..She flew over here to Canada on her own aged 70 last year and I was just sooooo proud of her........when she got here she took charge (Dusting, Cleaning, Sorting people out) She was Brilliant!
    My Husband was suffering from Pneumonia when she arrived and she just took over the running of the house..........
    I am so proud of her, it was the first time she ever flew alone, and she made it!!!!!!!!!! she was so super confident when she arrived that she flirted with my husband from across the airport lounge, waving to him, blowing kisses to him....wriggling her hips.......

    The only problem was........That was NOT my husband...The guy looked so embarassed.

    She screamed with laughing when she realised........ All Canadian men look the same

    a stand-up
    Tasha,
    Have you ever thought about moonlighting as a stand-up comediene(spelling?)for cancer awareness or just in general? You just seem to make people laugh so effortlessly,thanks!
  • jojo elizapest
    jojo elizapest Member Posts: 122
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    mothers and daughters
    The dynamics of mother and daughter relationships...yikes!

    Hard enough, hurt enough, twist turn and love in tandem enough...without adding cancer to the party.

    My mother died of cancer about 20 years ago...died about a year after diagnosis. My daughter at the time was four. Now my daughter is 24...she tells me since my diagnosis I have become much more direct. I think I've always told her exactly what I thought...but I did concede that what I am trying to say is feuled by a fear that i won't have a chance to tell her, to convince her, to save her pain from hanging on to long to a relationship. I also will not be there to spare her the pain, help her, share in her life, watch her beautiful daughter blossom...watch my beautiful daughter blossom.

    As an adult and after I became a parent I enjoyed a great relationship with my mom...but it was after years of my own years of making choices she didn't quite understand, taking risks that frightened her, becoming me. Now having cancer I am truly afraid I am going to not be able to have those years with my own daughter...after she is further down the road of becoming her. I am feeling very much like the clock is ticking....

    Now I may and hopefully will survive to enjoy many years of her telling me to mind my own business...or to watch her beautiful blue eyes roll dramatically in disagreement...or to have my hand braced on the dash as she drives, reaching to pull up her tank top when she is spilling out, or holding one of her babies hands as we walk through the park...my daughter holding the other.

    Yep...mothers and daughters....strange and odd connections...but it will take a hell of a lot more than cancer to severe them. Fear can reak havoc...but cancer...smancer!

    jojo
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    Options
    tasha_111 said:

    I really hate to say this.....
    I really hate to say this but, My mum and I havn't got on since I was 14 (48 now) BUT when I got diagnosed with this she was the GREATEST!..She flew over here to Canada on her own aged 70 last year and I was just sooooo proud of her........when she got here she took charge (Dusting, Cleaning, Sorting people out) She was Brilliant!
    My Husband was suffering from Pneumonia when she arrived and she just took over the running of the house..........
    I am so proud of her, it was the first time she ever flew alone, and she made it!!!!!!!!!! she was so super confident when she arrived that she flirted with my husband from across the airport lounge, waving to him, blowing kisses to him....wriggling her hips.......

    The only problem was........That was NOT my husband...The guy looked so embarassed.

    She screamed with laughing when she realised........ All Canadian men look the same

    tasha's mum...
    As always, your post is enchantingly amusing! In addition to the smile it brought to my face, it also warmed my heart. Sentimental, I guess. Though sorry for the reason - it's wonderful that you & your mum reconnected.

    Kind regards, Susan

    P.S.: Was your mum wearing turquoise when she arrived? :-)
  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
    Options

    mothers and daughters
    The dynamics of mother and daughter relationships...yikes!

    Hard enough, hurt enough, twist turn and love in tandem enough...without adding cancer to the party.

    My mother died of cancer about 20 years ago...died about a year after diagnosis. My daughter at the time was four. Now my daughter is 24...she tells me since my diagnosis I have become much more direct. I think I've always told her exactly what I thought...but I did concede that what I am trying to say is feuled by a fear that i won't have a chance to tell her, to convince her, to save her pain from hanging on to long to a relationship. I also will not be there to spare her the pain, help her, share in her life, watch her beautiful daughter blossom...watch my beautiful daughter blossom.

    As an adult and after I became a parent I enjoyed a great relationship with my mom...but it was after years of my own years of making choices she didn't quite understand, taking risks that frightened her, becoming me. Now having cancer I am truly afraid I am going to not be able to have those years with my own daughter...after she is further down the road of becoming her. I am feeling very much like the clock is ticking....

    Now I may and hopefully will survive to enjoy many years of her telling me to mind my own business...or to watch her beautiful blue eyes roll dramatically in disagreement...or to have my hand braced on the dash as she drives, reaching to pull up her tank top when she is spilling out, or holding one of her babies hands as we walk through the park...my daughter holding the other.

    Yep...mothers and daughters....strange and odd connections...but it will take a hell of a lot more than cancer to severe them. Fear can reak havoc...but cancer...smancer!

    jojo

    I am really sorry to hear
    I am really sorry to hear about your problems. I think you need to call your oncologist and get in as soon as you can. Tell them everything and I am sure they can help you. Good Luck!
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    Options

    a stand-up
    Tasha,
    Have you ever thought about moonlighting as a stand-up comediene(spelling?)for cancer awareness or just in general? You just seem to make people laugh so effortlessly,thanks!

    Night Shift for Tasha
    We suggested stand-up comic a while back, but she insists on being a landscape designer/ gardener (not sure what the correct title is) and Guppy Mom.

    By the way, J, Aortus would like an update on each of his godguppies.
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    Options
    Moopy23 said:

    Night Shift for Tasha
    We suggested stand-up comic a while back, but she insists on being a landscape designer/ gardener (not sure what the correct title is) and Guppy Mom.

    By the way, J, Aortus would like an update on each of his godguppies.

    Godguppies! :-)
    Moopy, my friend...

    Your own sense of humor is also admirable!

    Kind regards, Susan
  • DrSusanHardwicke
    DrSusanHardwicke Member Posts: 15
    Options
    Hope This Helps - I'm a Survivor Who Had Side Effects
    Dear dmc_emmy:

    It is absolutely heart-rending to read your post. It brings back memories for me, too, as a 6-year survivor.

    First, some of the symptoms you're experiencing could be side effects of chemotherapy. Not knowing which ones you had, I can't comment. You can find more information on one of my blogs at www.healthafterchemo.com. If not, email me at susan.hardwicke@vabion.com and I will send you information on chemotherapies and cognitive side effects that have been examined through research.

    If you feel that you need antidepressant medication, please consult a mental health professional for monitoring your benefits and/or side effects

    You should definitely tell your oncologist about the mood swings because they are likely related to your medication, as well as the hormonal changes resulting from chemotherapy. None of the medications youhave tried worked for me, and I had 2 years of Lupron shots that worked wonders.

    Warmest wishes!
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    Options
    Moopy23 said:

    Night Shift for Tasha
    We suggested stand-up comic a while back, but she insists on being a landscape designer/ gardener (not sure what the correct title is) and Guppy Mom.

    By the way, J, Aortus would like an update on each of his godguppies.

    GodGuppies........
    They are all the same colour! TURQUOISE!!!!!!!
  • djteach
    djteach Member Posts: 273
    Options
    Dear Emmy,
    The crying at the

    Dear Emmy,
    The crying at the drop of a pin, the anxiety, the depression and the meds. could all be connected and These same feelings are normal when one is given a diagnosis of b/c. If you don't feel like yourself, let your dr. know immediately. They may want to change meds. or add an anti-depressant. I won't speak for the women on the board, but I have gained so much from my anti-depressant, that I am able to feel things normally. Especially if you are worried about losing your daughter. Has she been supportive during your battle with cancer?

    You are obviously a very strong woman and I'm sure that you will get the help that is right for you. Let us know what you decide.

    Love and Gentle Hugs,
    Donna
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    Options
    Hi dmc_emmy, I am very new
    Hi dmc_emmy, I am very new to this site. I was just diagonis in April and I am pending surgery this June. However, before I was told I had cancer I also had a lot of stress/anxiety in my life and still do. Like you, it got to a point were I felt out of control. No one wanted to be around me. My son who was 27 at the time told me he did not like me anymore. My husband was on the same page with my son. I thought what do they know, until my best friend told me that I was the problem not them. I then found myself in my doctors office crying and telling her that I think I have lost my mind and no one likes me anymore. I don't think I even liked myself. She put me on some medication and after a few weeks on the medication everything changed. I felt much better, my family and friends saw the difference. I was sleeping better. Understand I did not do this for them, I did it for me.It does not have to be forever,just for now. I am still on antianxiety medication. Go to your doctor and ask for help, maybe it is a side affect of the drugs you are on, but maybe your on overload and just need a little more help and there is nothing wrong with that.Talk to your doctor. Talking about your problems with people who are willing to listen also helps, so keep on writing. Good Luck, take care of yourself.
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
    Options

    mothers and daughters
    The dynamics of mother and daughter relationships...yikes!

    Hard enough, hurt enough, twist turn and love in tandem enough...without adding cancer to the party.

    My mother died of cancer about 20 years ago...died about a year after diagnosis. My daughter at the time was four. Now my daughter is 24...she tells me since my diagnosis I have become much more direct. I think I've always told her exactly what I thought...but I did concede that what I am trying to say is feuled by a fear that i won't have a chance to tell her, to convince her, to save her pain from hanging on to long to a relationship. I also will not be there to spare her the pain, help her, share in her life, watch her beautiful daughter blossom...watch my beautiful daughter blossom.

    As an adult and after I became a parent I enjoyed a great relationship with my mom...but it was after years of my own years of making choices she didn't quite understand, taking risks that frightened her, becoming me. Now having cancer I am truly afraid I am going to not be able to have those years with my own daughter...after she is further down the road of becoming her. I am feeling very much like the clock is ticking....

    Now I may and hopefully will survive to enjoy many years of her telling me to mind my own business...or to watch her beautiful blue eyes roll dramatically in disagreement...or to have my hand braced on the dash as she drives, reaching to pull up her tank top when she is spilling out, or holding one of her babies hands as we walk through the park...my daughter holding the other.

    Yep...mothers and daughters....strange and odd connections...but it will take a hell of a lot more than cancer to severe them. Fear can reak havoc...but cancer...smancer!

    jojo

    A belated response
    Dear JoJo,

    My daughter and I have always been close. She was, and still is, my dearest friend. I know, this is probably not sounding like a good scenerio here, but that's just how it has been with us. She is now 21, a junior in college, bright and well-respected at her college and work, she still lives at home and commutes to college. She is dating a boyfriend that I am not that crazy about, but she says she loves him. She was 18 when I was diagnosed.

    I had hoped, since being diagnosed, that my daughter (an only child) would find someone to be there for her when I am not. Her father and I, divorced since '96, are good friends now, so I know that he will be there to support her. However, I was hoping that she would find the love of her life to be her support. She thinks she has found him, but her father and I do not feel as she does about him. I do not doubt that this situation has added to my stress.

    The other part of this story is that I'm scared. I am a 3-year survivor and I stopped my meds. I am back to the person I was before the drug therapy, but not the person I was before the cancer.

    In many ways, I suppose that you and I much the same in that we are more afraid of not being there for our daughters than of anything else that may come our way. I was told that people with the same type of invasive breast cancer as me have a 70% chance of surviving 15 years, if I continue my med therapy. I have a 30% chance of surviving those same 15 years without the meds (my daughter will only be 33).

    I made a choice to stop the medication, now I am concerned that I have done exactly what I feared most--not being there for my daughter. However, I could not live as I was and still be the mother I need to be for her now.

    Thank you for your response and I hope that you will be there for your daughter and all those terrifying hours as the passenger with her behind the wheel :). I remember those days all too well, and I cannot count the times my life flashed before my eyes.

    Donna
    PS: Emmy is my dog and, for now, she is my anti-depressant drug :)...thus my username.
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    Options
    tasha_111 said:

    I really hate to say this.....
    I really hate to say this but, My mum and I havn't got on since I was 14 (48 now) BUT when I got diagnosed with this she was the GREATEST!..She flew over here to Canada on her own aged 70 last year and I was just sooooo proud of her........when she got here she took charge (Dusting, Cleaning, Sorting people out) She was Brilliant!
    My Husband was suffering from Pneumonia when she arrived and she just took over the running of the house..........
    I am so proud of her, it was the first time she ever flew alone, and she made it!!!!!!!!!! she was so super confident when she arrived that she flirted with my husband from across the airport lounge, waving to him, blowing kisses to him....wriggling her hips.......

    The only problem was........That was NOT my husband...The guy looked so embarassed.

    She screamed with laughing when she realised........ All Canadian men look the same

    Welcome Back Tasha. Your
    Welcome Back Tasha. Your really something, never know what the heck your going to say.
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
    Options
    djteach said:

    Dear Emmy,
    The crying at the

    Dear Emmy,
    The crying at the drop of a pin, the anxiety, the depression and the meds. could all be connected and These same feelings are normal when one is given a diagnosis of b/c. If you don't feel like yourself, let your dr. know immediately. They may want to change meds. or add an anti-depressant. I won't speak for the women on the board, but I have gained so much from my anti-depressant, that I am able to feel things normally. Especially if you are worried about losing your daughter. Has she been supportive during your battle with cancer?

    You are obviously a very strong woman and I'm sure that you will get the help that is right for you. Let us know what you decide.

    Love and Gentle Hugs,
    Donna

    My anti-depressant drug
    Donna,

    Thank you for your response.

    For now, my anti-depressant drug is my dog Emmy. She makes me get out for a walk, except when it rains because she hates the rain, and except when it's bitterly cold because I hate the cold. :)

    Now that summer is approaching here in MI and the school year is coming to a close in the next 2 and a 1/2 days, I can feel the stress subsiding. I am out in my gardens working with Emmy close by, hoping that I will soon take her for a walk on the trail north of town.

    I don't know if I made a good decision about stopping the medication, but my oncologist knows and we will be dicussing this at my next visit. I told my GP recently. I am beginning to feel like the person I was before the meds, but I know I will never return to the person I was before the cancer. I think differently, I plan my future differently, I feel differently about simple things...yes, my life has changed as, I am sure, it has for all of us.

    I suppose, if one can find a positive to all of this, I have found that I am feeling that I must give back to the community. Emmy has been recently certified as a therapy dog, and though she is young, she loves to put on her blue therapy jacket and go to work. I hope to be volunteering a lot this summer at places like hospice, cancer centers, and (just for fun) "Read-with-the-Dogs" programs. I always felt that my work as a special education was good enough, even though I didn't (and still don't) always like my job. However, since my diagnosis, I didn't feel I had given enough.

    My daugher was a wonderful caregiver during my treatments. She often told me that she didn't think she was all that great, since she never had to take care of anyone before and I had always been the one taking care of her. I assured her that I could not have asked for a better caregiver.

    My daughter is currently a junior in college and has chosen to study applied clinical psychology, because she wants to serve families whose children have terminal or chronic illnesses. She especially wants to work with pediatric oncology. Yes, my cancer impacted her life as much as it impacted mine. For her, I hope that it leads her towards what she wants to do for her life's work. For me, I hope it will teach me how to appreciate the simple things in life.

    I hope I made a good choice to stop the meds, and I hope that my daughter will understand that I did it for her, should I leave her before my time.

    Donna
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
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    Kat11 said:

    Welcome Back Tasha. Your
    Welcome Back Tasha. Your really something, never know what the heck your going to say.

    Tasha.... WELCOME BACK.....
    Tasha.... WELCOME BACK..... You made me laugh for the first time in the last 24 hours.. I needed that!

    ~T
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
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    Kat11 said:

    Hi dmc_emmy, I am very new
    Hi dmc_emmy, I am very new to this site. I was just diagonis in April and I am pending surgery this June. However, before I was told I had cancer I also had a lot of stress/anxiety in my life and still do. Like you, it got to a point were I felt out of control. No one wanted to be around me. My son who was 27 at the time told me he did not like me anymore. My husband was on the same page with my son. I thought what do they know, until my best friend told me that I was the problem not them. I then found myself in my doctors office crying and telling her that I think I have lost my mind and no one likes me anymore. I don't think I even liked myself. She put me on some medication and after a few weeks on the medication everything changed. I felt much better, my family and friends saw the difference. I was sleeping better. Understand I did not do this for them, I did it for me.It does not have to be forever,just for now. I am still on antianxiety medication. Go to your doctor and ask for help, maybe it is a side affect of the drugs you are on, but maybe your on overload and just need a little more help and there is nothing wrong with that.Talk to your doctor. Talking about your problems with people who are willing to listen also helps, so keep on writing. Good Luck, take care of yourself.

    Thanks for the support
    Hello everyone who responded to my May 10th post,

    I appreciate all your responses and, nearly a month later, I am feeling much more like myself since I stopped my medication. Summer is, slowly, coming to MI and school will be out in 2 and a 1/2 more days! I think these are playing a huge part in my brighter outlook, but I am convinced that stopping the meds has helped as well.

    My pup, Emmy, has also been recently certified as a therapy dog and we will be visiting others this summer who are having greater challenges than I am having to face. We will, hopefully, also be involved with the "Read-with-the-Dogs" program. I'm outside more now, too, now that it has warmed-up to a balmly 60+ degrees :). Oh, how do I miss the sunny days along the beach in VA. Well, I'm here, so I enjoy the 60 days of warmer weather and try not think about the other 205 days that are 3-layer days.

    I will be talking to my oncologist at my next visit, but I don't know what he can offer me since there are no other drugs that I can take. We tried two others, and Tomaxiphen (sp?) I cannot take due to my blood-clotting disorder. Well, until then, I enjoy being drug-free and mood-stable.

    I wish you all well and, as for me, I'm heading out for another walk on the "North side of Town" trail. I may even put in some time on my gardens, before running needed errands and resting up for my remaining 2 and 1/2 days of work (sorry, I guess I already mentioned this point). I suppose you can tell that I am happy about my upcoming 3 months off and many more hours of Emmy and garden time, not to mention more time with my husband, friends, my wonderful daughter :).

    Donna