New Here, Need Spirts Up lifted

hward2007 · March 2008

Hi, Iam 33 with a husband and 13mth baby girl, I have a tumor in both breast, one is a stage one the other is a stage 3. I meet with the reconstruction dr. yeasterday and became completely catatonic with a slight melt down. I just finished 4 rounds of A/C and will have a bylateral Myscetamy in two weeks. I am trying to be strong for my family but reality hit very hard yesterday. Any suggestions for lifting of spirts.

skt48 · March 2008

I have stage 2 breast cancer. I hope this helps, when the cancer is removed the chemo should kill the cancer cells that could be anywhere else. After surgery your life can turn back semi normal again. It gets better as time goes by. I have started first round of chemo. Let family and friends like us support you. Good luck

seof · March 2008

First, I want you to know that your feelings are normal and OK. We all have days (or weeks) when we just can't handle it. If you don't already have help, try to get some. If you are involved in church, or any other support group, don't be shy about telling people what they can do to help. Sometimes it's nice to have someone just to listen to you, or do laundry, or bring groceries, or ride with you to the Dr., or to take care of the baby to let you have a few hours to yourself, or whatever you can think of. It is a major change in your life, don't feel bad about needing help, even counselling, if you need someone to listen. Look on the American Cancer Society website to find a local branch near you. They have people who have been there, done that that you can talk to in person. Also, your hospital may have a support group you could get involved with. For me, my church and family are great sources of help. None of us can do this alone.

Best wishes, seof

Unknown · March 2008

I know this is a very upsetting time for you right now. I remember the incredible shock and fear that I felt when I was diagnosed 2 years ago. Accept help when you need it.
people want to be there for you so tell them what you need. Be patient with yourself-this is a big shock physically and emotionally. Chemo is draining and the surgery is scary but you CAN get through this. Try to keep a positive attitude-the mind is a very powerful force. Try meditation/visualization CDs, they helped me to force the scary/negative thoughts out of my mind and to sleep at night. Try and eat even if you don't feel like it and be good to yourself through all this. I know this is huge and it sucks big time but please know that you will make it and once all this is done you can have your normal life back. You can get reconstruction if you want(they do amazing things now) and eventually all your treatments will be over. We are here for you and will be praying for you. Keep checking back to see if the chat rooms are up. Everyone here is kind and super supportive. God bless, and the best of luck to you. You WILL be ok. Eileen

survivor51 · March 2008

Hey Sweetie,
I am so sorry that you are not only young but a young mom. I had cancer in both sides and had a bilateral mastectomy March 15, 2007. I did have reconstruction done at the same time. They put in extenders and used muscle from my back. Each week I went and they put in saline until they were the size I wanted. After chemo, they took the extenders out and put in silicone implants. The road between the finding out and the actual mastectomy is extremely frightening. I'm glad you posted and are with us...your sisterhood. The mastectomy was not nearly as bad as I had in my mind and I totally love my new girls...I did love the "old" ones but as my hubby of 30 years told me...they feel pretty darn good. They are soft and move around just like my originals. The chemos, I counted down until I finished. We will be here for you during and after this. There is a caregiver chat for your hubby if interested on one night,,,I think Wed. It is listed under the caregivers board. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your baby girl and your hubby. WE WILL BE HERE FOR YOU!!!!! lots of HUGS, ANgela

mmontero38 · March 2008

Hi hward2007:
So sorry we have to meet under these circumstances, but you have come to the right place. We welcome you to the sisterhood. Here you will be able to post any question you might have and find the support of all these wonderful sisters that have either gone through this already or are going through it like you. It is very scary when you are first diagnosed but you need to surround yourself with positive support to help you through this. I had a radical mastectomy in june 2007 and had my reconstruction in feb 2008. I went through 8 rounds of CAF, lost my hair the second week after my first treatment and am now done with everything, have a head of thick curly hair and feel pretty good about myself. There will be days when you will feel down, but remember that it will soon be over and that you're baby girl needs you. We are here for you so please keep us posted. Many hugs and prayers for you and your family. Love, Lili

Skybuf · March 2008

Hi Hward..your surely not alone in this. Sometimes we feel isolated and alone, but you need just come in here to know there are others going thru and that have gone thru treatments. I had a bilateral mastectomy, no implants just me. I am getting a pair of prosthesis that I want now, the size that's comfortable and light. There is life after treatment hon, keep positive and when you need to cry, do so. I have melt downs too from time to time. It's normal, be good to yourself hon, and check in often here, the support is great.
God bless you, your in my prayers tonight

cabbott · March 2008

When I was first diagnosed, I didn't know anything about breast cancer. I didn't know if I would have a month, a year, or maybe two to live. I was more than just a little scared. I was PETRIFIED!!! The good news is that now I am past the 5 year point and doing pretty good. We don't get any choice in getting cancer nor in what kind of cancer we get. But we can get to the best docs and take the best recommendations to beat this beast. I needed support from fellow survivors so that I could ask all my questions and get the help I needed without over-burdening my husband and son. This website, the Wellness Community, the Breast Cancer Coalition, the local hospital and meeting folks at the local Relay for Life helped greatly. I was amazed at how many survivors were in my church. We meet every so often for lunch to support each other. I will pray that you find the support you need too. Don't be afraid to ask the nurses for help. They can help too.

lmcc725 · April 2008

God bless you I am 36 and I just finished all of what you are going through. Stay strong, take help when you need it and remember all of us survivors pray for you everyday.

New Here, Need Spirts Up lifted

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