Friday Giggles

JADot
JADot Member Posts: 709 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Hi Guys,

Yet more medical jokes to ring in the weekend. If you bust out laughing next time you see your doctor or nurse, I am NOT responsible :-)

Have a great weekend!
Ying

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Doctor Vs. Mechanic

Morris was removing some engine valves from a car on the lift when he spotted the famous heart surgeon Dr. Michael DeBakey, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager. Morris, somewhat of a loud mouth, shouted across the garage, "Hey DeBakey...Is dat you? Come over here a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where Morris was working on a car. Morris in a loud voice, all could hear, said argumentatively, "So Mr. fancy doctor, look at this work. I also take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish this baby will purr like a kitten. So how come you get the big bucks, when you and me are doing basically the same work?"

DeBakey, very embarrassed, walked away and said softly, to Morris, "Try doing your work with the engine running."


The Ranks of a Hospital

Surgeon:
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
Is more productive than a train
Is faster than a speeding bullet
Walks on water
Talks with God

Internist:
Leaps short buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful than a switch engine
Is faster than a speeding BB
Walks on water if the sea is calm
Talks with God if special request is approved

General Practitioner:
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds
Is almost as powerful as a switch engine
Can fire a speeding bullet
Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool
Is occasionally addressed by God

Resident:
Barely clears a picket fence
Loses tug-of-war with a train
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury
Swims well
Talks with animals

Intern:
Makes high skid marks on a wall when trying to leap buildings
Is run over by a train
Is not issued ammunition
Dog paddles
Talks to walls

Medical Student:
Runs into buildings
Recognizes a train 2 out of 3 times
Wets himself with a water pistol
Cannot stay afloat without a life preserver
Mumbles to himself

Nurse:
Lifts buildings and walks under them
Kicks trains off the track
Catches speeding bullets with her teeth and eats them
Freezes water with a single glance
The Nurse IS God!!!!

Comments

  • Moesimo
    Moesimo Member Posts: 1,072
    Ying,

    I love your post. I have been a nurse for almost 30 years. It made my w/e. Thanks alot.

    Maureen

    ps Tomorrow will be 4 years since I was diagnosed with this horrible disease. I will be celebrating big time.
  • kerry
    kerry Member Posts: 1,313
    Ying,

    Good giggles!! Thanks. My daughter, Kourtney, will appreciate this. Esp. that the nurse is God!

    Have a great weekend.

    Kerry
  • jsabol
    jsabol Member Posts: 1,145
    Hey, Ying,
    As another nurse, I loved the last one; my experience as a patient has only increased my admiration for my fellow professionals.
    Hope all is well. Judy
  • AveriRN
    AveriRN Member Posts: 61
    Thank you for the giggles, I, too, am a fellow nurse and will copy this for my fellow chemo nurses. I know they will appreciate them as well. Hope all of you have a great weekend.

    Averi