Body image and a colostomy

tennislover
tennislover Member Posts: 64
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
I would be interested to hear from people who have had a colostomy bag and how they dealt with any body image issues. I am worried about how I will be able to adjust to the way I am going to look after surgery. I dont mean to be superficial, the most important thing is to be alive but there is a part of me that really worries at how I am going to react to the way I look after my surgery. Any advice or comments would be helpful!

Comments

  • kerry
    kerry Member Posts: 1,313 Member
    I don't have a colostomy so I can't speak from personal image perspective, however I have been with people who have colostomy bags and I NEVER KNEW IT! check out this site www.colondar.com

    Then look at the 2006 "colondar" and find Miss April! She has a colostomy! The Colondar says we are proud to be survivors!!

    Kerry
  • spongebob
    spongebob Member Posts: 2,565 Member
    kerry said:

    I don't have a colostomy so I can't speak from personal image perspective, however I have been with people who have colostomy bags and I NEVER KNEW IT! check out this site www.colondar.com

    Then look at the 2006 "colondar" and find Miss April! She has a colostomy! The Colondar says we are proud to be survivors!!

    Kerry

    Kerry took the words right out of my mouth regarding Tiffany. Check her out at http://www.colondar.com If you would like, drop me an e-mail here and I will provide you with Tiffany's home e-mail address. I'm sure she'd be happy to chat with you.

    - SpongeBob
  • 4law
    4law Member Posts: 110
    I had a temporary colostomy for about 3 months. Of course, I'm glad it was temporary, but after a lot of trials and errors, I finally got a good fit with the best equipment for my body -- everyone is different and there is no one correct answer for everyone -- and learned to adjust. If I didn't tell anyone, no one would have known I had a bag. The best advice I can give is to keep trying until you get a good ostomy nurse. The nurse in the hospital was a waste of time. The first visiting nurse wasn't too much better. But finally, after complaining a lot, I had a nurse who hooked me up with the best equipment for my body. Try out as many sample bags as possible until you find what works best for you. I learned that my new nurse had a colostomy for about 20 years -- and if she hadn't mentioned it to me, I would have never known. You will look the same after surgery. Good Luck!
  • jerseysue
    jerseysue Member Posts: 624 Member
    I've had my colostomy for 1 year. I don't think anyone can tell that you have one unless you are like me and point it out or make a joke about it. I was a bit worried when I went swimming the other day in Ohio but it wasn't a problem. When I came out of the bathroom I noticed that I could see the round wafer but I truly doubt that anyone could tell what it was. Then again I'm not a stunning beauty so no one is really looking at me. Sue
  • scouty
    scouty Member Posts: 1,965 Member
    I had a tempy colostomy for over 2 years. I was "fortunate" to be able to have it reversed in January of this year or so I thought. I guess I got used to looking at myself with it because when I first looked at myself without it I was stunned.

    Since then, getting used to the new plumbing is very humbling. I'm not sure what I am trying to tell you other then take each and every day one at a time. Trust me, you will be enlightened and disappointed almost daily. It all boils down to how you chose to deal with it all.

    I had an accident tonight and was angry at myself at first but then I laughed for thinking watching the weather report was more important then running to the bathroom. I am so fortunate to be dealing with any of this!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Please try not to stress over it just yet. There are always so many what ifs.

    Lisa P.
  • nanuk
    nanuk Member Posts: 1,358 Member
    getting a good ostomy nurse is good advice..mine put the stoma location right on my belt line, so I am limited as to what clothing I can wear. If I swim, I have to have trunks that ride high. I don't know your gender, but I'm sure there are issues for females that I'm not famiiar with, butI am male and can do anything that I did before the ostomy;. I hav had my colostomy since 2000. It took a lot of experimentation, but "Henry" & I get along pretty well now. One thing you should discuss with the nurse/doctor is the flush versus protruding stoma; In europe, they tend to leave a little stoma protruding..mine is nearly flush to my skin, and has a tendency to leak. If I had known about this before, I would have asked them to make it stick out just a little. This enhances the seal, and makes the pouch last longer. I have to alternate between a convex and a flat appliance to keep my stoma from shrinking under the skin. Feel free to e-mail me with any questions. Bud
  • cal79
    cal79 Member Posts: 57
    I had an ileostomy for 9 months while my j-pouch healed. When I was told that this was happening, I was 25 years old, I had just got married, and had never even heard of a stoma let alone knew how one functioned.

    I actually handled the idea of the bag reasonably well, and despite much urging from the stoma nurse I decided that I did not need to watch videos of old people dancing along the beach with their external appliances, or read testimonials from grannies about which undies to wear with a bag.

    In retrospect, it would have been a very good idea to have made use of these materials. I had an absolute crisis of confidence and my body image hit the floor after the surgery, which I think I could have avoided if I had known what to expect. For example, I would have found it helpful to have seen pictures of what a stoma actually looked like (nothing like I thought by the way).

    The advice you can get from the stoma nurse and other websites (the best being www.ostomates.org) about diet in the early stages, underwear to help keep the appliance in place, and general info about what you will actually need to change a bag is invaluable.

    I found the first few weeks quite a trial (although most of the dramas I could have avoided by taking my head out the sand) and after about a month I actually forgot about the bag for the most part. I went back to wearing skirts and shorts and all the rest of it (tracksuit pants are mandatory for the first few weeks after surgery..). I also went to pilates classes with no problems at all, and went swimming with the dolphins in my swimsuit 10 weeks later.

    So what I am trying to say (in a very roundabout way) is that body image is a very important part of the process, but I really believe that if you know what to expect, and you have available to you the resources that you need (the absolute neccesity being a good stoma nurse) then the transition is much easier.

    I found after a few months that I could eat the same foods as before, wear the same clothes as before, take part in the same activities as before, and work just the same as before. I just wish I had known (or believed) that in the couple of weeks after surgery!

    Cal :)