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did you feel this way?

Posts: 1
Joined: Feb 2006

I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer in September and had a complete hysterectomy in October. I have had 6 chemo treatments so far. I was doing great. Positive attitude and all. Never once thought that I would ever actually die from any of this. It was just a little setback, I'd go thru chemo and everything would be fine. I'm starting to realize that I've been putting alot of energy into stupid things so I wont think about cancer, but more and more its creeping into my mind and I'm having to deal with the reality that I do have cancer and my life will never be the same. I guess I've been the queen of denial for the past 5 months. Now, Im starting to attempt to deal with this and its all a bit overwelming. Is this a normal process or am I sinking into a depression? I'd appreciate some insight into how others have coped. Thanks

Posts: 288
Joined: May 2003

Hi Debbie, I am familiar with what you are going through. I thought I had to be cheerful and upbeat for my family and the rest of the world and denied to myself the opportunity to worry a little, to be afraid. Eventually, it all caught up with me and I became very depressed. Luckily for me, I had to get help and found a very nice psychiatrist who helped me deal with the whole thing. it is normal to be afraid and worry, the thing is not to sink in those feelings and never to lose hope. Have faith in whoever you believe in, it helps a lot. I hope you have support from family and friends because that helps too. Allow yourself to have feelings, sometimes you feel good, sometimes you feel bad, all of that is very normal. Give yourself some slack, you do not have to be "feel" great all the time. Just don't lose hope. Your feelings of denial are NORMAL and it is normal to feel depressed at times, after all, treatment is not always easy. If you feel the need, many oncology depts have social workers to help cancer patients deal with all those feelings. I kept myself very busy for a while so I wouldn't see the reality of the situation. A positive attitude helps too, that is, do not lose hope. Have you visited the survivors chat room? People there are nice, understand what you are going thru, you can vent there, sometimes we laugh together and other times we cry together. They are all willing to give support.
Don't know what else I can suggest except that you are now in my prayers.
All the best,

Posts: 22
Joined: Jan 2006

I found this book to be a lot of help to me. I was diagnosed 4 years ago, had a rad. hyst., chemo and radiation. This book helped me emotionally: Cancer: 50 Essential Things to Do by Greg Anderson. You can get it at www.amazon.com or www.cancerrecovery.org - the author's site. He has been a survivor for over 10 years after being given 30 days to live. Hope this helps.

Posts: 288
Joined: May 2003

debbie, Check this website. It is the Cancer Survivor Movie, a short video.

well's picture
Posts: 26
Joined: Apr 2005

It appears to be a Flash site, so I can't see it here, but perhaps you mean http://thesurvivormovie.com? I couldn't find a site at the URL you listed.

Though it doesn't have the word "cancer" in the domain, this site seems to indicate it may be the one you meant.

Posts: 288
Joined: May 2003

the address is: www.thesurvivormovie.com

KathiM's picture
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

Debbie, yes, it is fairly normal, but any touch with the beast is awful! Good for you for your attitude, I have a positive one as much as possible, too. Please e-mail me if you get this, I don't know if you still check here or not.

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