Young People Who Have Been Caregivers For Their Parents/Relatives

Hi. I'm 26 and I am from Illinois. I am taking care of my dad who has nonhodgkins lymphoma. It has been very hard. It would be nice to chat with you. My email is Wahwa26@comcast.net

I'm not as young as you guys as I am 39, but mny wife is only 36, and has terminal cancer.

Believe me, I NEVER though I would be caring for my spouse this young!

It is incredibly lonely, painful, and scary. I also have three young children (9,7,5).

Love to chat. I'm tpalmieri@expensewatch.com

JenniferR24 said:

Hi all. I'm a 24-year-old from the Midwest and I'm helping take care of my mother, who has advanced breast cancer. It's been very difficult. My dad (who was my mother's husband) died of cancer in '96. I'd love to email or chat with others who've been involved in taking care of their parents when they have cancer. My email's jenneruss@hotmail.com. Thanks.

Hello Jennifer. My name is Lori and I'm 23. My mother also has cancer. Between my dad and I we are taking care of her. She started her first Chemo treatment on Thursday. I know how tough it is. Would like to talk to you sometime. Since we both are going through similiar situations. Take care, my e-mail is piglet8122@hotmail.com

jess78 said:

I was 23 when my mother was diagnosed with cancer and my dad and I had to take care of her. She lived for four months after she was diagnosed. I'm now 26, but will never forget what it feels like to have to care for your own mother. You have to be strong for her, yet be strong for yourself. There may be times when you have to get away, and I would encourage you to do just that. If you don't save time for yourself, you will be lost as well she is.

It is difficult caring for a parent, when for so long they took care of you. But stay positive for everyone involved, including your dad. No one can know what it's like unless you go through it. I hope your mother's chemo works out well, and she lives on for many years to come.

Hi, my mother had breast cancer and even went into remission but it came back and she went through every type of chemo and radition there is and she passed away dec.23 this past year. It has been very hard. I have 3 small childern twin boys who are 2 and a 4 yr old girl. Shock just wore off and now feeling the pain and it hurts....

My mom
My mom passed away last July of 2009, and I was her caregiver for two years eing her only child living at home. I found out my mom had cancer when I was only 14 and since then I cared for her two weeks before my 17th birthday, she peacefully passed. It was so devastating to get so close and for her to leave me so broken hearted, but I am so honored to have been given the chance to be her caregiver. I miss my mom more and more everyday because everyday is more different then yesterday only because my mom is not here to make my life stable. I know she will guide me through the rest of my life..

Young Caregivers
Hi Ang,

My name is Melissa and my mom has had cancer on and off since I was 12 years old. The first year wasn't so bad because I had my dad. My dad however, passed away from a sudden heart attack about a year later. After that I became my mothers primary source of help. I'm 27 years old now and still the primary source of care for her. Things aren't great now and her life expectancy is 2-3 years but we are making the most of whatever time we have. If you ever feel like speaking with someone please don't hesitate to reach out to me at any time.

-Melissa

caylaloveshermom said:

Hello! Reading these posting
Hello! Reading these posting really breaks my heart. My age will be 21 in December. I just found out my mom has Stage 4 lung cancer this past Friday. I am on an emotional roller coaster just trying to be strong for her. It's so incredible hard and I feel as though I'm not doing enough. Even though my grandmother and dad are around they aren't really capable of taking care of her. My mom is 59 and I feel she still has so much life left in her. She has been my other half and I am going to fight this all the way with her. It's hard to understand what normal is.

- Cayla

Your all quite special
I have been on these boards for a few years. I have had cancer and now help others in my local area. I was surprised by the response to this question. I have three young daughters of my own, and I can't imagine how proud your parents must be. To give up so much of yourself at such a young age and take on all of this responsibility. As older adults we watch T.V. and see all the bad things young people are doing. We don't see enough of the good. Its young people like you that give me hope for the future of this country and world. Don't ever think you can't have an impact on the outside world and many people. Because you sure had an impact on me. Bless you all Slickwilly

so sorry
Hi everyone,

It breaks my heart hearing all of your stories, so similar to mine, adn to think I was so lonely in this world where nobody knew how I felt.. boy was I wrong! Just some words from someone who knows what it's like.. I was 15 when I found out my mom was diagnosed with an unknown source of cancer. I didn't even know what to think at my age, all I knew was that I would become her caregiver. With no father present, my two older siblings were off at college, and nobody else was living at home with the two of us. Cancer changed our whole lifestyle. She quit her job, began chemo and radiation, and I did whatever I could to ease the pain and let her live as long as she could. She was given about 5 months. But she didn't pass until 2 years and a month later. July 18, 2009 will stay in my heart forever because it was truly the last time I told my mom I loved her. She passed away 2 weeks before my 17th birthday, and am still so deeply lost without her. I was there when God took her.. and even though it was sad to say the least, it was beautiful. We all got our one on one time with her. But I will never, for the rest of my life, forget the words she spoke to me. I know she is watching over me everyday, just like your mothers and fathers and wives and husbands. And if your loved one is still alive, cherish those memories that you both have together. Tell them you love them multiple times a day because once it is taken from you, you will never get those moments back.

It hurts, it really does knowing my mom won't be at my high school graduation, nor my college, my wedding, or my kids wont be able to know their grandma, or any other holidays or family get togethers. Everywhere I drive, I wish my mom was in the passenger seat.. or everytime I am watching t.v. I wish she was on the other couch all bundled up because she was always so cold.. or everytime I come home from school or go to bed, I wish I could tell her how good my day was or I love you. With all the sadness that I had and still have with my mom's passing, I am so thankful for the time I did have with her, for the independent time we spent together, and the friendship and mother-daughter relationship we grew.

With all the sadness your heart is experincing, remeber that they love you, I know my mom did!