Survivors and alcohol abuse

CaregiverOne
CaregiverOne Member Posts: 2
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
My wife went through nine months of breast cancer and I was her primary caregiver. We got through it successfully and she is 2 years from dx.

She is NOT on any drugs (i.e. Tamoxofen) but meets with oncologist every 3 months for another year or two, then every six months for a vew years, then every year to her 10-year anniversary.

Ever since her treatments were over, she has been drinking a lot. I can't stand it, and it is becoming an extremely serious problem for me.

We have talked about it (we communicate very well) and she says that when it gets dark she begins to fear that the cancer will return. She has a glass of wine to dull the feeling and then finds she can't stop.

We made a deal that she wouldn't have any more than 2 a night, and she said that that helped her because it gave her a limit.

That lasted about 2 weeks, and she is slipping back into drinking more than that.

Each time we talk about it, she says she feels better and she has much better control for a few days, but always seems to go back into it.

Have any of you had this problem or heard of someone else who did?

What should I do?

Comments

  • RebeccaJane
    RebeccaJane Member Posts: 19
    This is a really hard situation for you both. I am not a doctor but I think that she cant do this without some extra help, maybe some really mild anti-depressent could help. Lots of peolpe need them at difficult times in their lives and they dont end up addicted though of course this is something to be careful about. It is obvious that you have a great relationship but you both need a break from this stress about drinking. Good luck and best wishes.
  • CaregiverOne
    CaregiverOne Member Posts: 2

    This is a really hard situation for you both. I am not a doctor but I think that she cant do this without some extra help, maybe some really mild anti-depressent could help. Lots of peolpe need them at difficult times in their lives and they dont end up addicted though of course this is something to be careful about. It is obvious that you have a great relationship but you both need a break from this stress about drinking. Good luck and best wishes.

    Thank you for your message.

    We have, in fact, gone to see a psychopharmacologist who has given her some Xanax, plus made a small change to the other meds she already takes.

    She has identified that she feels some anxiety when the day turns into night, and that is when a med she is taking for hot flashes seems to be wearing off. Coincidence? We'll see... she is now taking the hot-flash med twice a day instead of once.

    The Xanax is fast-acting and safe and is a safety net in case she feels the anxiety at that time... she takes a very small dose. We use an online pharmacy (reputable, not a spammer's pharmacy) and should get them in today's mail.

    Just the change in the hot-flash med seems to be helping; she may not even need the Xanax, but it will be here for her just in case.
  • jhope
    jhope Member Posts: 58

    Thank you for your message.

    We have, in fact, gone to see a psychopharmacologist who has given her some Xanax, plus made a small change to the other meds she already takes.

    She has identified that she feels some anxiety when the day turns into night, and that is when a med she is taking for hot flashes seems to be wearing off. Coincidence? We'll see... she is now taking the hot-flash med twice a day instead of once.

    The Xanax is fast-acting and safe and is a safety net in case she feels the anxiety at that time... she takes a very small dose. We use an online pharmacy (reputable, not a spammer's pharmacy) and should get them in today's mail.

    Just the change in the hot-flash med seems to be helping; she may not even need the Xanax, but it will be here for her just in case.

    I don't know if you will even read this if it has been so long. I am an extremely strong independent professional woman. I have great faith in the Lord. I also experience anxiety in evenings and hot flashes (40 now) cuz of chemo. I try so hard not to take clonopine but the anxiety is ABSOLUTELY INDESCRIBEALBE.

    I have also live with an alcoholic husband who is now sober. She really needs medication or she will medicate herself. I wish I could reach thru and hug you both. God bless and hang tough, Julia
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