DON'T HATE YOUR CANCER.

lp1964
lp1964 Member Posts: 1,239 Member

With this new topic I will try to put a new perspective on our illness.

My name is Laz, I am a 48 year old male with a beautiful wife, a 15 year old amazing daughter, a great carreer, a big Stage 2-3 Rectal cancer and in the best case I will end up with a permanent colestomy.

Even though we have every reason to hate cancer and everything that comes with it and all bad in this world, but the emotion of hate is not good for you. It will add a useless nagative component to your days, it changes the way you see yourself, others and the world. These crapy days will add up to be crapy weeks, crapy weeks will add up to be crapy years and crapy years will make a crapy life.

It's inevitable that we all have this emotion in tough times, but you have to train yourself to seek out the good things even in your crapiest days, find them, stop, and appreciate them.

In so many ways cancer puts a new perspctive in our lives. Remember the phrases that you could never live by:

"One day at the time."

"Live like this is your last day."

"Every day do something that scares you." Elinor Roosevelt

"Live Like you are dieing."

"What would you do if you had 6 months to live?"

"When you are walking through hell, just keep walkind." Churchill

Here is our chance to suck the juice out of life, because we are going through the worst and have less and less to lose.

Wish you all the best. Laz

Comments

  • johnsnowden
    johnsnowden Member Posts: 20
    interesting idea

    ...although i myself never really hated my cancer i find myself hating cancer as a whole for what it's done and is doing to many people in our lives and around the world.

    i never 'hated' my cancer, i accepted it, and dealt with it, and so far i have been fortunate, my stage 3b rectal tumor, 5cm, seems to have gone away completely from radiation/chemo treatment only, although i feel diet and meditation and metaphysical soul searching have helped, and thus far biopsies have all shown 'no malignancies'. an approach i had in the beginning, and still have, maybe in relation to the attitude you profess, was not to 'fight' or 'battle' cancer, but to adopt an attitude, mind and body, whereas i would try to create an environment where cancer would no longer feel welcome. i know this can be seen as a way of 'fighting' cancer, but the direct attitude i try to maintain is not one of confrontation and hostility but of acceptance with redirection. i did not chose to try to 'fight fire with fire'.

    this discussion is extremely personal and i will never try to impress my beliefs on others with a cancer diagnosis. however, i am glad you have 'broken the ice' on this topic, as it has been important to me. there is no desire for me to 'hate' or 'fight' anything in this reality now, only the desire to constructively create what is good for myself and for all souls. 

     

  • lp1964
    lp1964 Member Posts: 1,239 Member

    interesting idea

    ...although i myself never really hated my cancer i find myself hating cancer as a whole for what it's done and is doing to many people in our lives and around the world.

    i never 'hated' my cancer, i accepted it, and dealt with it, and so far i have been fortunate, my stage 3b rectal tumor, 5cm, seems to have gone away completely from radiation/chemo treatment only, although i feel diet and meditation and metaphysical soul searching have helped, and thus far biopsies have all shown 'no malignancies'. an approach i had in the beginning, and still have, maybe in relation to the attitude you profess, was not to 'fight' or 'battle' cancer, but to adopt an attitude, mind and body, whereas i would try to create an environment where cancer would no longer feel welcome. i know this can be seen as a way of 'fighting' cancer, but the direct attitude i try to maintain is not one of confrontation and hostility but of acceptance with redirection. i did not chose to try to 'fight fire with fire'.

    this discussion is extremely personal and i will never try to impress my beliefs on others with a cancer diagnosis. however, i am glad you have 'broken the ice' on this topic, as it has been important to me. there is no desire for me to 'hate' or 'fight' anything in this reality now, only the desire to constructively create what is good for myself and for all souls. 

     

    Well put John,

    That's exactly what I meant. Sometimes these questions creap up in my mind:

    Why me?

    Why did I deserve this?

    But I try to turn the meaning around: "what does God or Life want me to do with this. Which direction does He or She want me to turn my life?

    I believe these big things happen, because we have to make changes. How else is Life gonna tell you to drop your bad habbits, start eating, behaving and live right. We all got many little signals earlier in our life, but we ignored them. We kept working and stressing too much, eat and drink the wrong things, smoke, alcohol etc. Then we received medium signals: little aches and pains, a little diarrhea, a little blood in the stool and we still ignored them.

    Well, now we got the big warning that some things need to change. All of us here started researching what to eat, dropping bad life style habbits, taking off time, appreciating old and forming new relationships, getting closer to God or becoming more insightful and spiritual.

    I belive getting cancer has multiple causes: genetic, environmental, dietary, STRESS etc. and that is why it is so hard to prevent it and find a cure for it.

    At the same time we are ever challenged to stay positive and make our lives meaningful, because without this attitude and gratitude life is not worth living even if you get cured.

    Thank you for listening,

    Laz

  • pete43lost_at_sea
    pete43lost_at_sea Member Posts: 3,900 Member
    great post, i agree

    hate and anger are unhealthy, even if directed at cancer.

    so i  pursue health with focus, and life with passion, granted treatments take alot of energy and time and money.

    i am mindful of not hating cancer.