Treatment plan - need your wisdom

CherylHutch said:

Late with a response!
Hey Kathleen.... sorry I'm chiming in so late. Wading through the topics has become such a chore when one is on limited online time .... but I eventually get to the worthy topics.

I think what the guys (and gals) have told you throughout is marvelous and there's not too much more I could add to it in the way of advice on what to do or what to ask, when to hold back, etc. etc.

But, what I can remind you of, because throughout everything you both have had to be facing... ****'s cancer treatments, the scare when it acts up again, your daughters special needs requirements and you other daughter just being a Sweet 16 teen.... I have to ask, "HOW the heck do you juggle all of it???" Forget what are you doing right and/or what should you be doing differently... both of you are doing exactly the right thing and working through it as a family. Like everything else, there are ups, there are downs, there are good times, there are not so good times, but never once did any of the down times make you say, "I think I'm going to leave". No, because you both adore each other, always have and always will. Period.

**** knows that and if anything, because these treatments can be round on a person, he probably just needs reassurance that even though his life has turned upside down and back again and now is about to turn upside down again... are you all as a family going to remain the same and is he still going to be able to be part of that family? You just remind him that you started this journey with him back when you said "I do", before you even knew what journey that "I do" was going to take you on. But you are on the ride with him because you adore him and you would never pick anyone else to go on any other kind of adventure with.... you two are a team. Assure him that if he can do some of the things he could do pre chemo, then great, and if not, then the two of you will work out together what kind of help you can ask for from friends and family and **** can supervise the help. There are all kinds of ways of getting around a problem... but they only are successful if **** knows you are his team mate no matter what sorts of things have to change... temporarily while he's on treatment

Huggggggggs!

Cheryl

CherylHutch said:

Huggggs!
I just love you too.... have ever since you and **** first came on board There's this phenomena about online "boards". Long before the internet became mainstream and everyone has a computer and access to it.... there were these online services called "proprietary services"... like GEnie, Compuserve, Prodigy and yes, the beginnings of AOL. You could join any one of these services and there was a monthly fee to belong (as well as charges if you came on during prime time during the day hours). All of these services were "text based", like this board where all our communication is done by typing. Actually, this board has a bit higher tech features than those services because we can put up pictures, or add audio/video clips to our Expressions pages. But for the most part, the communication is done by leaving text messages on a public board for anyone who is a member can see, read and respond to. These proprietary services also had private messaging (which back in the day we called email) and you could send a private message to ANYONE within that proprietary service. But you could not send messages to someone on one of the other services (IE: Someone on GEnie could not send to someone on Compuserve), So these services were like separate planets. Of course everyone thought the service they were on was the BEST and had the BEST people on it and were quite condescending to the other services.

Then, as it was bound to happen, these services started shutting down or cutting back on development because the internet was not a lot more savvy looking. Although people were only used to text-based communications they were quickly picking up on other features like images, video, audio, etc., so the internet was like a galaxy! All these little planets of proprietary services could branch out their wings and join the internet and do all sorts of things they couldn't do before.

But here we are on CSN... still depending on the good old basics of communicating by text. And I still am just as fascinated by meeting people this way as I was back in the mid-80s meeting people on GEnie. The novelty has never worn off for me and I've been involved with online communications for 26 years now. When someone first comes on board, I can tell right away that they may be nice and we can maintain a fun and healthy online friendship. There are others who are like leopards... I know right away they are not my cuppa tea ... and no matter how many disguises they put on, they just can't change their spots. And then there are the absolute gems! From the minute they leave their first post saying "Hi. I'm new here. This is my story", I get this visceral (is that a word??) connection where I feel like I should have known them all my life and no matter where in the world they live, if I were to move to that part of the world and met them in person, we would be BFF friends for life. I have met a lot (and I mean a LOT) of wonderful, caring, supportive friends on this board... and what keeps me coming back (besides these wonderful friend) are the handful of gems of friends I have met here too. Now I'm not going to mention who they are... I think they know since they will have had the same feeling... but you, my friend, are one of those people I'm so happy to call one of those gems!! And I bet if we were to poll everyone here (no, I won't do that to embarrass you), I think you'd find the majority of people who have been on these boards for any length of time will totally agree with me that you are a gem.

So let's raise a cuppa tea (or whatever you are drinking right now) to Friendships and Gems of Friends

:::: getting off box with a thud :::

Now, I really must go and get a load of laundry started. Unless one of you would like to come over and do my laundry for me? In that case, I have 3 loads of laundry to do