RFA, Microwave ablation, or Aggressive Chemo?

I could really use some advice. I was dx'd in Oct 2007 with Stage IV cc with mets to my ovaries. I had a hysterectomy, but no resection then because the colon cancer was a surprise. One month later I had a resection for an adenocarcinoma to my small bowel. I then did 6 months of Folfox w/Avastin and remained NED for several months. For the past 1.5 years we've been watching 8 small nodules in my lungs that have been too small to even biopsy. We've tried a short period of 5FU with Avastin that didn't change anything and I started Xeloda, but stopped almost immediately to go back into the watch and wait mode. In December, I had my PET scan and at my dr visit, he said two nodes have grown minimally, with one now being at the 1 cm mark. He recommended waiting, rescanning in 4 months, and then considering chemo if there is more growth. He then said that thinking outside the box, would I like to see a radiology oncologist about the nodes since I'm clean everywhere else? I said sure, met with the ro, who said that 6 to 8 nodes is too many to treat with radiosurgery. He recommended aggressive chemo with radiosurgery followup if anything remains. That's his first choice. He did say I might be able to have Radio Frequency Ablation and then do the radiosurgery on any nodes left. So he referred me to an interventional radiologist for a consult. Man, I didn't realize how many different procedures and doctors get involved in this!

I met with the IR about the RFA on Wednesday and I'm scheduled to do either RFA or microwave ablation on Thursday, Jan. 13. He can zap 2 this time, then 2 in another month, and then 2 a month later. That would leave only 2 nodes for radiosurgery. But he also explained that he thinks I should do chemo because "even though we don't see anything anywhere else on your scans, you probably have more elsewhere." And statistics show the RFA will prolong my life 1-3 years. Well, I cried all the way home. I called my oncologist who is supposed to call me Monday. I spoke to his nurse last night and she basically said that the RFA and radiosurgery are because you don't want to do chemo. I explained that it's not that I don't want to do chemo. I want to win this fight, whatever it takes. I thought the RFA/radiosurgery was an alternative to get rid of these nodes permanently because I don't have anything showing up anywhere else.

I'm a single mom with two sons in college and I have a good job that pays the bills, but I work a lot of hours. There's no other money coming in. My ex-husband covers the boys' college expenses, so that's good. Bottom line, I have to work to pay my bills. I have no other means of support. So aggressive chemo is going to make working a lot tougher. I drive two hours a day for my job and then work 8-9 hours. In busy season, I work 10-12 hours a day. Obviously, I'll do the chemo if that's my best option. But here's my question? What if I do the RFA and nothing else shows up? Plus I can still do the chemo if something does show up later, right? What am I missing? Is it really better to do the chemo now?

Please tell me what you think because at this point, I'm probably going to cancel the RFA. But I also am more depressed than I've ever been because the message I'm getting is pretty negative. I know the odds, but they didn't expect me to live this long and I'm one of the healthiest people I know. I've got these d**n spots and that's it. I'm so tired of hearing that Stage IV terminal message...I get the message, but I could also be terminal if I get hit by a bus tomorrow! Sorry, I just needed to vent. Please let me know what you would do.