Cancer depression

eric38 said:

Thanks
I do have alot to be grateful for. one of the things is all of the support you`ve given me and the other thing is that in spite of the increased amount of liver tumors I am not in that much pain and am not experiencing any symptoms of advanced liver disease other than light to moderate pain and fatigue. If I can get this thing nipped in the bud it will be ok. Its just that it grew so fast in the 3 months it took to figure out what to do with me next. The great thing about this new therapy, if the depression doesn`t kill me, is that it replaces a growth regulator that alot of cancer cells are deficient in and it can make chemo resistant cancer cells more sensitive to chemo therapy. The treatments are hard on me because they use a virus to introduce the genetic material into the cells. the first treatment is a mandatory 48 hour visit to the hospital because it can cause you to have low blood pressure,rapid heart beat and they said almost everyone gets a fever between 102 and 104. In my case all i experienced was a little bit of the chills and that was it. The doc said this treatment usually puts people in the hospital 3 or 4 times during the whole course and my only time so far was the 48 hour observation period. so, other than the extreme fatigue and depression symptoms my body is handling the treatment well. I hope that means it is accepting it and not rejecting it. Sorry i ranted on but it makes me feel better to name the positives in all this. There is a silver lining. I will be so glad when this is over and I can move on. It`s only 3 more weeks. I can do anything for 3 weeks. those of you who are prayers, please say a prayer that this a turn around treatment for me.
Donna - Hang in there sweetie. You are kind of in my same boat right now but your docs will find just the right treatment for you

geotina said:

Dear Eric:
Although I am the caregiver not the patient, I wanted to jump in and say I'm sorry you are having such a tough time.

Take care - Tina

snommintj said:

Nothing to worry about
Eric. I don't think death is something you need to worry about. I almost died last year. In fact, I distinctly remember taking what I thought was my last breath. The crazy thing is that I was totally cool with it. I think our body has developed a defense mechanism for it. When I closed my eyes and struggled for that last breath, my mind was completely clear and I was happy. Obviously they revived me and here I am. I'm not advocating death, I'm just saying the passing isn't all that bad. I don't want to die but I know it'll be easier now that I've been to the edge and experienced the worst of it. As for living. I try to maximize what I have to work with. If I'm sick and can't get out of bed I ponder the most difficult questions and tackle the hardest problems that my mind can grasp. I try to solve things that can be substantiated. I've found that philosophical ramblings provide little support. If all I can do is take one step, I try to make it the best step I've ever taken. I focus on the entire process. I do have a little boy so having time for anything other than him is also hard work. I've had a terrific year so far. The Dr gave me 30 days Jul 09. Here I am, I turned 37 a few minutes ago. I know I'm living on the brink, but I kind of like it here.