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  • sfmarie
    sfmarie Member Posts: 602
    #42
    phoebe1017 said:

    Hey Kathy
    I could never be angry with him for giving up the fight. I see how hard it's been on him and it breaks my heart to see such a strong healthy man deteriorate so quickly.

    I have read many of your stories to him and they do inspire him...but his liver is not at all inspired. If there was anything I could do to just keep him strong and improve his liver function. His bilirubin was at 18 the last time I asked....I didn't ask today...I was afraid of the answer.

    I don't know what it's like to go through chemo or surgery or all the other horrible "treatments" he has had to endure. But I do know that it is excruciating to sit back and watch a loved one go through this.

    All your stories inspire me everyday and I will never stop searching for something new to help him.

    Dr. Labow at Mt. Sinai
    Seems to be quite aggressive with the liver. My prayers are with you but please please do not give up! My prayers are with you.
  • suzanne-yes
    suzanne-yes Member Posts: 24
    #43
    grandmafay said:

    I am so sorry about your
    I am so sorry about your news. I just wondered if you knew about the caregivers discussion board here. I didn't find it until late in my husband's cancer battle. There are a number of people going through the same things you are on that board. Just go a little lower in the listings. It doesn't get as much traffic as this one, but it was really helpful for me. Fay

    Sorry to hear your news.....
    Phoebe,

    After your husband's ascites is drained, he may feel much better! The fluid in his tummy is very uncomfortable, sometimes makes it hard to breathe, and is exhausting.

    From reading your earlier posts, it sounds as though his bilirubin is really rising, too. If the tumor is blocking the bile duct a stint or drain can on occasion be placed to allow the bile to flow instead of backing up. You would need to consult with an interventional radiologist about this possibility. The high bili may also make him much more fatigued and his thoughts may be very scattered.

    Thinking of you,
    Suzanne
  • phoebe1017
    phoebe1017 Member Posts: 37
    #44
    suzanne-yes said:

    Sorry to hear your news.....
    Phoebe,

    After your husband's ascites is drained, he may feel much better! The fluid in his tummy is very uncomfortable, sometimes makes it hard to breathe, and is exhausting.

    From reading your earlier posts, it sounds as though his bilirubin is really rising, too. If the tumor is blocking the bile duct a stint or drain can on occasion be placed to allow the bile to flow instead of backing up. You would need to consult with an interventional radiologist about this possibility. The high bili may also make him much more fatigued and his thoughts may be very scattered.

    Thinking of you,
    Suzanne

    Suzanne
    The doctors said the tumors are not blocking his bile duct. They say that the disease has just caused his liver to stop functioning. I'm not convinced that the chemo didn't shut his liver down. The CT showed the tumors were a little bigger but not much had changed. I guess the cause isn't important at this point. My hope had been that they would find a blockage but unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

    You are exactly right....he seems confused most of the time and it is hard to carry on a conversation. He is eating a little but stays in bed most of the time. It's heart wrenching! As much as I dread the thought of living without him....I hope for his sake this phase doesn't last a long time. :(
  • Kathleen808
    Kathleen808 Member Posts: 2,342 Member
    #45
    phoebe1017 said:

    Suzanne
    The doctors said the tumors are not blocking his bile duct. They say that the disease has just caused his liver to stop functioning. I'm not convinced that the chemo didn't shut his liver down. The CT showed the tumors were a little bigger but not much had changed. I guess the cause isn't important at this point. My hope had been that they would find a blockage but unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

    You are exactly right....he seems confused most of the time and it is hard to carry on a conversation. He is eating a little but stays in bed most of the time. It's heart wrenching! As much as I dread the thought of living without him....I hope for his sake this phase doesn't last a long time. :(

    Phoebe
    Phoebe,
    I am thinking about you a lot and pray the two of you can get some peaceful time. So very sorry you two are at this point.

    With aloha,
    Kathlen
  • dianetavegia
    dianetavegia Member Posts: 1,942 Member
    #46
    Gosh that's awful
    I hope this phase is over very quickly and I do hope Mike is not in pain.

    Do you have family near-by who can help you?
  • thready
    thready Member Posts: 474
    #47
    phoebe1017 said:

    Suzanne
    The doctors said the tumors are not blocking his bile duct. They say that the disease has just caused his liver to stop functioning. I'm not convinced that the chemo didn't shut his liver down. The CT showed the tumors were a little bigger but not much had changed. I guess the cause isn't important at this point. My hope had been that they would find a blockage but unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

    You are exactly right....he seems confused most of the time and it is hard to carry on a conversation. He is eating a little but stays in bed most of the time. It's heart wrenching! As much as I dread the thought of living without him....I hope for his sake this phase doesn't last a long time. :(

    Prayers and thoughts
    Phoebe,
    Sending prayers for you both, praying for you to have time to be together without the pain. My heart hurts for you so much.
    Jan
  • phoebe1017
    phoebe1017 Member Posts: 37
    #48
    dianetavegia said:

    Gosh that's awful
    I hope this phase is over very quickly and I do hope Mike is not in pain.

    Do you have family near-by who can help you?

    Yes
    Some close friends stayed with me all weekend and my mother and sister are coming tomorrow. They will be a great help and comfort to me. Hospice is also coming by tomorrow. Everyone keeps saying how helpful they are but I'm not quite there yet....we'll see.
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    #49
    phoebe1017 said:

    Yes
    Some close friends stayed with me all weekend and my mother and sister are coming tomorrow. They will be a great help and comfort to me. Hospice is also coming by tomorrow. Everyone keeps saying how helpful they are but I'm not quite there yet....we'll see.

    you have a PM
    I has sent you an address an a phone # for Vanderbilt Ingram Cancer Center...I went there, they are excellent...
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    #50
    Very Sorry to Hear this
    Things can happen so quickly. I hope Michael is resting and being as comfortable as he possibly can. The same goes for you Phoebe, it can't be easy at all.
    -phil
  • MelanieT
    MelanieT Member Posts: 186
    #51
    phoebe1017 said:

    Hey Kathy
    I could never be angry with him for giving up the fight. I see how hard it's been on him and it breaks my heart to see such a strong healthy man deteriorate so quickly.

    I have read many of your stories to him and they do inspire him...but his liver is not at all inspired. If there was anything I could do to just keep him strong and improve his liver function. His bilirubin was at 18 the last time I asked....I didn't ask today...I was afraid of the answer.

    I don't know what it's like to go through chemo or surgery or all the other horrible "treatments" he has had to endure. But I do know that it is excruciating to sit back and watch a loved one go through this.

    All your stories inspire me everyday and I will never stop searching for something new to help him.

    I am so sorry and so sad for
    I am so sorry and so sad for you.. This monster is so cruel and does what it wants. Chris scans of the mass in his lungs came back as a cluster left over from his blood clots but this week he has horrible stomach pain and they are worried its there.. Half the time i dont want the answers so i so understand not asking today.. i will pray for you both and know i am here to vent..
    Loves,
    Mel
  • idlehunters
    idlehunters Member Posts: 1,787 Member
    #52
    PhillieG said:

    Very Sorry to Hear this
    Things can happen so quickly. I hope Michael is resting and being as comfortable as he possibly can. The same goes for you Phoebe, it can't be easy at all.
    -phil

    Praying for you
    SITEMAN Cancer Center, Barnes Hospital..........in St. Louis, MO. Not too far from your area. I have heard very good things about them. I am from Illinois but went to M.D. Anderson in Houston for second opinion. I was not happy with the "place itself" Just tooooo large for me. Felt like cattle being herded in. You are referred to by number at all times. I got the same opinion from them as I got from my home town Onc. I am just a small town gal and needed the one on one. Everyone is different. Funny thing...... after I got back home to my first picked Onc...... I found out then that he had worked at M.D. Anderson for almost 3 years before setteling in "his" small town practice. I felt in very good hands THEN.... and NOW. Will keep you in my prayers

    Peace.... Jennie
  • dianetavegia
    dianetavegia Member Posts: 1,942 Member
    #53
    Phoebe, I thought of you so
    Phoebe, I thought of you so many times last night and first thing when I woke this morning. I'm so glad your mother and sister will arrive today. You shouldn't have to go through this time alone.

    I'm praying for you and for Michael. I pray he isn't in pain and that you can spend time remembering good things. In a way, it seems kinder that he's confused at times.

    Gosh, I don't know what to say to you. My heart just breaks for you and Jenny (Mike Curtis' wife). Please just know we're thinking of you and praying for Michael during this time.

    Diane
  • dianetavegia
    dianetavegia Member Posts: 1,942 Member
    #54
    Phoebe
    I hope your Mother and Sister have arrived and are settled in. I hated to think of you and Michael alone last night. I'm sure it's hard to get even a few minutes sleep right now.

    I'm praying for you and Michael and just wanted to let you know I've not forgotten what you're going through.

    Much love,
    Diane
  • kdo29
    kdo29 Member Posts: 25
    #55
    just said a prayer

    just said a prayer
  • fringetree
    fringetree Member Posts: 65
    #56
    kdo29 said:

    just said a prayer

    just said a prayer

    phoebe
    I'm so sorry. Your love for your husband is so apparent and you have fought so hard for him. I'm praying for peace for both of you.

    melissa
  • lostit2003
    lostit2003 Member Posts: 53
    #57
    fringetree said:

    phoebe
    I'm so sorry. Your love for your husband is so apparent and you have fought so hard for him. I'm praying for peace for both of you.

    melissa

    prayers
    phoebe

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband. update us when you can. I've only been on this site a short time but I already have discovered what a source of support it is.

    Tina

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