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  • kktylo
    kktylo Member Posts: 17
    karguy said:

    Sorry
    I'm sorry to hear about all your problems,I pray that they get better.I know of other spouses who left when they were dx.Fatigue and depression are part of the side effects of the treatment and they will pass,but you have to get some medication for the depression,iron pills and vitamins B&C helped with the fatigue but they took awhile.I'll pray things get better.

    Thanks for the advice
    I am currently taking antidepressents, but its good to know about the vitamins also. Thanks for the prayers.
  • just4Brooks
    just4Brooks Member Posts: 980 Member
    My insight and support
    Hi Vicki, It was sure hard to read your post yesterday. I'm so sorry you're going through such a hard time. From being a man and as I see it I'm glad he's gone. You don’t need any negative people around you now anyways. Cancer is hard on a person and you don’t need the extra stress in your life. See about getting something for depression. I had to after the first month of my dx in April 2009. They have helped a lot, but I still have my down times. But it's mostly seems to be that first week after chemo treatment that I get sad. It's hard on ya. Remember to keep coming to this board. You will find it to be a big help to you as it has been to me. We're here for you.

    Brooks
  • kktylo
    kktylo Member Posts: 17
    mom_2_3 said:

    Vicki
    I am sorry you have found this board under such circumstances. I was diagnosed last November with Stage IV at the age of 39 and we also have three young children. I understand from that perspective what you are experiencing. But your recounting of your husband's betrayal has honestly brought me to tears as it just seems so unfair.

    I want you to know that you are not alone. That I and the other members of this board are here for you. If you ever need to talk please PM me and I will send you my telephone number. Please come here as often as you can to share in your story for as you do so, you will find you also help others even as you hopefully help yourself.

    As others have also promised, I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

    Amy

    Amy
    Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. Thanks so much for the prayers and for helping to keep me positive when things seem so dark.
  • kktylo
    kktylo Member Posts: 17

    bumping this up
    so that maybe someone in AZ will read it - I notice that there is already one, but AZ isn't a small place.

    I can relate in the way that I had recently left my husband and moved here to MN. I am in a relationship, but it is fairly new, and I have to admit that I was worried that he wouldn't want to stick around (thank goodness I was way wrong). My kids are teenagers, but I also didn't know anyone here. It was a bit lonely, but I made wonderful friends here on the boards, and also at my treatment center. I hope all goes well for you. I agree with another poster that it is much harder to loose someone you love than to go through the cancer, but what a double whammy!

    I am originally from
    I am originally from MN..where abouts are you? Its wonderful that you have found someone that is standing beside you. I hope someday to find the same.
  • grammadebbie
    grammadebbie Member Posts: 464
    So Sorry
    Dear Vicki,

    I'm sorry for what you are going thru. Just remember, cancer isn't your fault nor is your husband leaving you. So many times we second,third, etc. guess ourselves as if we could have changed things. It is what it is now and I pray that you will find an inner strength to get you thru this. I'm sure your children are an inspiration for you to get well. Please take care of yourself. You need to rest and surround yourself with love and positive people. I'm so glad you have found this forum. Anytime you need a hug just imagine all of us giving you a great big one. We are here for you. Don't hesitate to talk about anything here. So many lovely people who really care for you. We are all different and have different circumstances yet we have a common threat that binds us together. Peace to you. I will continue to pray for you and please feel free to share your emotions, questions, etc here.

    God Bless you,

    Debbie (gramma)
  • grammadebbie
    grammadebbie Member Posts: 464
    So Sorry
    Dear Vicki,

    I'm sorry for what you are going thru. Just remember, cancer isn't your fault nor is your husband leaving you. So many times we second,third, etc. guess ourselves as if we could have changed things. It is what it is now and I pray that you will find an inner strength to get you thru this. I'm sure your children are an inspiration for you to get well. Please take care of yourself. You need to rest and surround yourself with love and positive people. I'm so glad you have found this forum. Anytime you need a hug just imagine all of us giving you a great big one. We are here for you. Don't hesitate to talk about anything here. So many lovely people who really care for you. We are all different and have different circumstances yet we have a common threat that binds us together. Peace to you. I will continue to pray for you and please feel free to share your emotions, questions, etc here.

    God Bless you,

    Debbie (gramma)
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    Welcome
    Welcome to the boards. I'm sorry you have so much to deal with on your plate right now. It can be overwhelming at times. The more treatments you take, the more anxiety and fatigue you will have. It just accumulates over time and catches up with you. You can ask any questions you need on this board. Even in the middle of the night there is usually someone lurking around. I do hope you get some help and good luck with your treatments.

    Kim
  • lesvanb
    lesvanb Member Posts: 905
    Welcome Vicki
    I am so sorry that you have had the year that you have. I'm glad that you have found this board and I hope that it is helpful for you. It sounds like Mike lives close to you in Phoenix.
    Post anytime; lots of people are on the board at all hours.

    all the best, Leslie
  • pf78248
    pf78248 Member Posts: 209
    So sad to hear your news
    Dear Vicki,
    I read your post yesterday but was so saddened I couldn't immediately respond. I am married to my best friend David who is also a stage 4 cancer survivor with a single met to the liver.

    I don't live in Arizona but if I did, I'd be honored to be your friend. I simply can't imagine any husband or wife bailing out on their loved one going through cancer. And especially not the mother to three precious children. I find it hard to believe how cruel people can be.

    But the good news is you will find so much love and support here. I don't post very often but I come to this board every few days to find information and inspiration. This is truly an amazing group of people who are all affected by cancer.

    Stay strong for the children and yourself and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I wish you the best for things to turn around for you. You deserve some positive things to happen in your life.

    Sending you hugs,and I am so sorry for what you are going through.
    Priscilla
  • Sonia32
    Sonia32 Member Posts: 1,071 Member
    Hey Vicki
    firstly welcome to the board l am so glad you have found us. lam so sorry about your diagnosis and your husband leaving you.you have found a second family in us and now you are here you are stuck with us. l can relate to the depression side of your cancer as most of us can but please stay with us to vent laugh or cry we will be here for you big hugs sonia
  • robinvan
    robinvan Member Posts: 1,012
    Hi Vicki
    Like others here, I am so sorry to hear about both your diagnosis and your family challenges. As a father of three (grown up now) I know how much work parenting is. Tough to go it alone, especially coping with cancer treatment. I hope you have good support near by to help out.

    I'm stage 4 as well, 5+ years. I've been through the various chemo cocktails, radiation and surgery. It sounds like you are well into the 12 week program. It will soon be over!

    Rob; in Vancouver
  • coolvdub
    coolvdub Member Posts: 408 Member
    robinvan said:

    Hi Vicki
    Like others here, I am so sorry to hear about both your diagnosis and your family challenges. As a father of three (grown up now) I know how much work parenting is. Tough to go it alone, especially coping with cancer treatment. I hope you have good support near by to help out.

    I'm stage 4 as well, 5+ years. I've been through the various chemo cocktails, radiation and surgery. It sounds like you are well into the 12 week program. It will soon be over!

    Rob; in Vancouver

    Hi Vicki,
    First off, welcome

    Hi Vicki,

    First off, welcome to the board. You will find many new friends and great information here.
    I'm truly sorry to to hear of the family challenges you are facing, as Brooks mentioned, from a mans standpoint you are better off without him as he doesn't sound very supportive. What you need is positive thinking and people around you at this point. Just do what you can around the house and have the older kids help with what they can. Also just an idea, but check in with your local American Cancer Society office they may have some social programs that can help with childcare and meal prep so you can get the required rest you need to get through the Chemo. I will say a prayer for you and your family if it's okay?

    Don
  • daydreamer110761
    daydreamer110761 Member Posts: 487 Member
    kktylo said:

    I am originally from
    I am originally from MN..where abouts are you? Its wonderful that you have found someone that is standing beside you. I hope someday to find the same.

    woodbury....
    just south of saint paul. and a bit crazy after living in Florida for 16+ years! but I knew the guy 27 years earlier, he was a wonderful guy, just had no idea what I was getting myself into moving here! Now I find myself trying to talk him into moving south! Grew up in Philly, so cold isn't foreign, but so much snow....lol!

    Unfortunately, I work for the BN RR, and with a bunch of guys, so I haven't had much opportunity to meet many people, and since I work so many hours it's hard to actually want to go anywhere to meet anyone else. I'm also the only female where I work. When I got my DX, I really was basically alone with no one to talk to. I was truly fortunate to have Nick, and my GF flew up from FLA for the end of the surgery and first treatment. I found this site one nite and they have been my family and friends ever since, and also gave me a reason to crawl out of bed.

    Keep coming back here - just truly an amazing spirit uplifting bunch of people! I just wish sometime they lived closer....