NED

13»

Comments

  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    CR1954 said:

    I truly.....
    I truly find it very hard to believe that ANYONE on this board would call Mike a pervert or say that he is on this board to look at boobs. Whether in a post or by PM.

    Those were Mike's words.

    Honestly, can anyone here think of someone who would do that? And if they did, don't you think CSN would have taken action for something like that?

    CR

    Wow
    Well, a lot of strong feeling have been expressed here. I don't believe that any feeding frenzy is going on. CR and others have been extremely respectful and honest in stating their discomfort with Mike's presence here. That's legitimate. As far as I can tell, no one called Mike a pervert or a liar. We are taking him at his word that he had a cancer scare and was subsequently found NED. The fact that his posts are offending many members here is another story and something to be addressed openly. Personally, I don't believe Mike is a good fit for this site. It's not about being a man or being NED. In my opinion, his posts create a lot of drama without being relevant to our mission here of supporting women with breast cancer. I also think he has issues that cannot be addressed in this group. I know people disagree and some find him supportive. I also don't believe that anyone is "ordering" him to leave. But expressions of discomfort with Mike's posts are perfectly legitimate without being nasty. Discussion and dissent are normal parts of any close group of people who care deeply about each other.

    I sincerely hope that people on either side of this debate do not leave this family. That would indeed be a tragedy, because we all need each other. I would be devastated if Tasha, CR, Debi, Teena, Outdoor Girl, or anyone else in this debate left. Please don't do that. Let's have our discussion respectfully like we're doing and continue to support each other in the meantime.

    I truly wish Mike well, as does everyone who here who has expressed an opinion. Being NED is a gift.

    Mimi
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    mimivac said:

    Wow
    Well, a lot of strong feeling have been expressed here. I don't believe that any feeding frenzy is going on. CR and others have been extremely respectful and honest in stating their discomfort with Mike's presence here. That's legitimate. As far as I can tell, no one called Mike a pervert or a liar. We are taking him at his word that he had a cancer scare and was subsequently found NED. The fact that his posts are offending many members here is another story and something to be addressed openly. Personally, I don't believe Mike is a good fit for this site. It's not about being a man or being NED. In my opinion, his posts create a lot of drama without being relevant to our mission here of supporting women with breast cancer. I also think he has issues that cannot be addressed in this group. I know people disagree and some find him supportive. I also don't believe that anyone is "ordering" him to leave. But expressions of discomfort with Mike's posts are perfectly legitimate without being nasty. Discussion and dissent are normal parts of any close group of people who care deeply about each other.

    I sincerely hope that people on either side of this debate do not leave this family. That would indeed be a tragedy, because we all need each other. I would be devastated if Tasha, CR, Debi, Teena, Outdoor Girl, or anyone else in this debate left. Please don't do that. Let's have our discussion respectfully like we're doing and continue to support each other in the meantime.

    I truly wish Mike well, as does everyone who here who has expressed an opinion. Being NED is a gift.

    Mimi

    Thanks Mimi.
    Have you and Christmas Girl been taking "peacemaking classes"? You guys are very good at it!
  • padee6339
    padee6339 Member Posts: 763
    I have read...
    the posts above and while I agree with some, I disagree with others. Mike, you were here before me and I have not read any posts which have offended me. I am sincerely thankful that you do not have bc (except for one more surgeon exam). I hope those results came back like that. Stay healthy and strong and if you decide to go, come back and say hi once in a while and let us know how you are doing. God Bless!
    Pat
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    mimivac said:

    Wow
    Well, a lot of strong feeling have been expressed here. I don't believe that any feeding frenzy is going on. CR and others have been extremely respectful and honest in stating their discomfort with Mike's presence here. That's legitimate. As far as I can tell, no one called Mike a pervert or a liar. We are taking him at his word that he had a cancer scare and was subsequently found NED. The fact that his posts are offending many members here is another story and something to be addressed openly. Personally, I don't believe Mike is a good fit for this site. It's not about being a man or being NED. In my opinion, his posts create a lot of drama without being relevant to our mission here of supporting women with breast cancer. I also think he has issues that cannot be addressed in this group. I know people disagree and some find him supportive. I also don't believe that anyone is "ordering" him to leave. But expressions of discomfort with Mike's posts are perfectly legitimate without being nasty. Discussion and dissent are normal parts of any close group of people who care deeply about each other.

    I sincerely hope that people on either side of this debate do not leave this family. That would indeed be a tragedy, because we all need each other. I would be devastated if Tasha, CR, Debi, Teena, Outdoor Girl, or anyone else in this debate left. Please don't do that. Let's have our discussion respectfully like we're doing and continue to support each other in the meantime.

    I truly wish Mike well, as does everyone who here who has expressed an opinion. Being NED is a gift.

    Mimi

    Thank you Mimi....
    all I can say is well said!! :) Pammy
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    mimivac said:

    Wow
    Well, a lot of strong feeling have been expressed here. I don't believe that any feeding frenzy is going on. CR and others have been extremely respectful and honest in stating their discomfort with Mike's presence here. That's legitimate. As far as I can tell, no one called Mike a pervert or a liar. We are taking him at his word that he had a cancer scare and was subsequently found NED. The fact that his posts are offending many members here is another story and something to be addressed openly. Personally, I don't believe Mike is a good fit for this site. It's not about being a man or being NED. In my opinion, his posts create a lot of drama without being relevant to our mission here of supporting women with breast cancer. I also think he has issues that cannot be addressed in this group. I know people disagree and some find him supportive. I also don't believe that anyone is "ordering" him to leave. But expressions of discomfort with Mike's posts are perfectly legitimate without being nasty. Discussion and dissent are normal parts of any close group of people who care deeply about each other.

    I sincerely hope that people on either side of this debate do not leave this family. That would indeed be a tragedy, because we all need each other. I would be devastated if Tasha, CR, Debi, Teena, Outdoor Girl, or anyone else in this debate left. Please don't do that. Let's have our discussion respectfully like we're doing and continue to support each other in the meantime.

    I truly wish Mike well, as does everyone who here who has expressed an opinion. Being NED is a gift.

    Mimi

    Dear Mimi:
    First off, I hope your weekend - and whatever you did for enjoyment - lifted your spirits. We always look forward to your return on Mondays! :-)

    Since outdoorgirl/Patty(*) has likened the two of us together as "peacemakers" - I feel compelled to post in wholehearted agreement with your wisely worded perspective. This is not a matter of female vs. male - Bill S., a BC survivor, is most welcome here. As is Aortus/Joe, our beloved Moopinator's primary caregiver. Both of them, in my humble opinion, have ALWAYS posted with an obvious tone of sensitive consideration for the legitimate reasons we are ALL here.

    We are ALL here because this is the American CANCER Society (ACS) site: we are members of the CANCER SURVIVORS Network (CSN), and active participants on the BREAST CANCER Board. Mike was originally welcomed by many. By his own admission - now, he is neither a BC Survivor (thankfully, very fortunate for him), NOR has he ever been a BC primary caregiver (hopefully, he never will be). This is not a purely "social networking" site - to use it as such is extremely offensive, at least to me, because it trivializes the real reason we're here. Which is to seek from and provide to support and encouragement amongst those who "walk in our shoes"...

    I speak next only for myself: I get lots of support - of a different type - from family and friends, for which I am truly grateful. However, amongst that beloved circle - not one of them is a breast cancer survivor. Which is exactly why I'm here. Again, for which I am truly grateful.

    Over time, Mike has made it quite obvious - and unabashedly, seemingly without any sense of self-imposed boundaries - to all that he certainly has several serious issues to deal with, MOST of which are NOT cancer related. Some of those very issues have caused a great deal of discomfort, if not outright fear, amongst many members. There are many, MANY other options more appropriate and available to him - even here, within the ACS/CSN site, via other boards. (Another example: Facebook includes at least HUNDREDS of "networks"...)

    Not long ago, when a few members (from another board, non-BC) "invaded" the BC board with questionable intent and harassed at least one other member via PMs to the point where the victim almost left the group - the vast majority rallied around her, and convinced her to stay. The few harassers have either left, or gone silent. (Thank goodness.) I simply don't understand why some see this differently. So very MANY are now uncomfortable with Mike's presence, how many may have ALREADY left no one knows - why the divisiveness? Why do some seem to feel it's OK for MANY to suffer or depart, because of ONE?

    I just hope it all ends very soon, Yesterday wasn't soon enough. For me, personally, the entire situation has become so upsetting and emotionally draining that I have little - if anything - left for the real purpose I'm here... To support and encourage others, those in REAL need related to breast cancer. And I am so, so sorry to admit that...

    The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one (or, of the few).

    Thank you, Mimi.

    Kind regards, Susan

    (*) P.S. to outdoorgirl/Patty: I'm not quite sure how to interpret your comment about Mimi and I "taking peacemaking classes"?!? I hope it is more of a compliment, if anything - and not intended as a criticism. I am simply honestly expressing my personal perspective.
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member

    Dear Mimi:
    First off, I hope your weekend - and whatever you did for enjoyment - lifted your spirits. We always look forward to your return on Mondays! :-)

    Since outdoorgirl/Patty(*) has likened the two of us together as "peacemakers" - I feel compelled to post in wholehearted agreement with your wisely worded perspective. This is not a matter of female vs. male - Bill S., a BC survivor, is most welcome here. As is Aortus/Joe, our beloved Moopinator's primary caregiver. Both of them, in my humble opinion, have ALWAYS posted with an obvious tone of sensitive consideration for the legitimate reasons we are ALL here.

    We are ALL here because this is the American CANCER Society (ACS) site: we are members of the CANCER SURVIVORS Network (CSN), and active participants on the BREAST CANCER Board. Mike was originally welcomed by many. By his own admission - now, he is neither a BC Survivor (thankfully, very fortunate for him), NOR has he ever been a BC primary caregiver (hopefully, he never will be). This is not a purely "social networking" site - to use it as such is extremely offensive, at least to me, because it trivializes the real reason we're here. Which is to seek from and provide to support and encouragement amongst those who "walk in our shoes"...

    I speak next only for myself: I get lots of support - of a different type - from family and friends, for which I am truly grateful. However, amongst that beloved circle - not one of them is a breast cancer survivor. Which is exactly why I'm here. Again, for which I am truly grateful.

    Over time, Mike has made it quite obvious - and unabashedly, seemingly without any sense of self-imposed boundaries - to all that he certainly has several serious issues to deal with, MOST of which are NOT cancer related. Some of those very issues have caused a great deal of discomfort, if not outright fear, amongst many members. There are many, MANY other options more appropriate and available to him - even here, within the ACS/CSN site, via other boards. (Another example: Facebook includes at least HUNDREDS of "networks"...)

    Not long ago, when a few members (from another board, non-BC) "invaded" the BC board with questionable intent and harassed at least one other member via PMs to the point where the victim almost left the group - the vast majority rallied around her, and convinced her to stay. The few harassers have either left, or gone silent. (Thank goodness.) I simply don't understand why some see this differently. So very MANY are now uncomfortable with Mike's presence, how many may have ALREADY left no one knows - why the divisiveness? Why do some seem to feel it's OK for MANY to suffer or depart, because of ONE?

    I just hope it all ends very soon, Yesterday wasn't soon enough. For me, personally, the entire situation has become so upsetting and emotionally draining that I have little - if anything - left for the real purpose I'm here... To support and encourage others, those in REAL need related to breast cancer. And I am so, so sorry to admit that...

    The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one (or, of the few).

    Thank you, Mimi.

    Kind regards, Susan

    (*) P.S. to outdoorgirl/Patty: I'm not quite sure how to interpret your comment about Mimi and I "taking peacemaking classes"?!? I hope it is more of a compliment, if anything - and not intended as a criticism. I am simply honestly expressing my personal perspective.

    Susan...I am almost
    Susan...I am almost certainly positive that it was a compliment... I see in you both words of "calm wisdom and understanding".... that is a peacemaker.... and I believe that is what we need now... it would be nice to finally lay this issue to rest and use our time and energy to focus on what it is we "really need"...eachother...

    Hugs, Love & Friendship,

    ~T
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565

    Dear Mimi:
    First off, I hope your weekend - and whatever you did for enjoyment - lifted your spirits. We always look forward to your return on Mondays! :-)

    Since outdoorgirl/Patty(*) has likened the two of us together as "peacemakers" - I feel compelled to post in wholehearted agreement with your wisely worded perspective. This is not a matter of female vs. male - Bill S., a BC survivor, is most welcome here. As is Aortus/Joe, our beloved Moopinator's primary caregiver. Both of them, in my humble opinion, have ALWAYS posted with an obvious tone of sensitive consideration for the legitimate reasons we are ALL here.

    We are ALL here because this is the American CANCER Society (ACS) site: we are members of the CANCER SURVIVORS Network (CSN), and active participants on the BREAST CANCER Board. Mike was originally welcomed by many. By his own admission - now, he is neither a BC Survivor (thankfully, very fortunate for him), NOR has he ever been a BC primary caregiver (hopefully, he never will be). This is not a purely "social networking" site - to use it as such is extremely offensive, at least to me, because it trivializes the real reason we're here. Which is to seek from and provide to support and encouragement amongst those who "walk in our shoes"...

    I speak next only for myself: I get lots of support - of a different type - from family and friends, for which I am truly grateful. However, amongst that beloved circle - not one of them is a breast cancer survivor. Which is exactly why I'm here. Again, for which I am truly grateful.

    Over time, Mike has made it quite obvious - and unabashedly, seemingly without any sense of self-imposed boundaries - to all that he certainly has several serious issues to deal with, MOST of which are NOT cancer related. Some of those very issues have caused a great deal of discomfort, if not outright fear, amongst many members. There are many, MANY other options more appropriate and available to him - even here, within the ACS/CSN site, via other boards. (Another example: Facebook includes at least HUNDREDS of "networks"...)

    Not long ago, when a few members (from another board, non-BC) "invaded" the BC board with questionable intent and harassed at least one other member via PMs to the point where the victim almost left the group - the vast majority rallied around her, and convinced her to stay. The few harassers have either left, or gone silent. (Thank goodness.) I simply don't understand why some see this differently. So very MANY are now uncomfortable with Mike's presence, how many may have ALREADY left no one knows - why the divisiveness? Why do some seem to feel it's OK for MANY to suffer or depart, because of ONE?

    I just hope it all ends very soon, Yesterday wasn't soon enough. For me, personally, the entire situation has become so upsetting and emotionally draining that I have little - if anything - left for the real purpose I'm here... To support and encourage others, those in REAL need related to breast cancer. And I am so, so sorry to admit that...

    The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one (or, of the few).

    Thank you, Mimi.

    Kind regards, Susan

    (*) P.S. to outdoorgirl/Patty: I'm not quite sure how to interpret your comment about Mimi and I "taking peacemaking classes"?!? I hope it is more of a compliment, if anything - and not intended as a criticism. I am simply honestly expressing my personal perspective.

    Susan,
    I thought about it after I typed it and wondered if you would take it as criticism. No,it wasn't. I only meant it as a compliment. We may have our disagreements(and I am starting to understand your points of views-though I still feel compassion for Mike),but first and foremost we are(I still hope)friends!Lets not let anything come between that!
  • dyaneb123
    dyaneb123 Member Posts: 950
    padee6339 said:

    I have read...
    the posts above and while I agree with some, I disagree with others. Mike, you were here before me and I have not read any posts which have offended me. I am sincerely thankful that you do not have bc (except for one more surgeon exam). I hope those results came back like that. Stay healthy and strong and if you decide to go, come back and say hi once in a while and let us know how you are doing. God Bless!
    Pat

    Guys, why so cut and dried?
    Guys, why so cut and dried? If some members enjoy communicating with Mike , then they are free to do so.He obviously touched Tasha's heart, and I admire her generosity.To demand that he leave our site is a little overkill I think. If, like me, you find his posts a little "off", then IGNOR THEM....dont read them , dont respond to them....But we don't have to be unkind,he hasn't crossed any lines of acceptable behavior that I am aware of, and I think this is what is upsetting our sisters. I hope Mike will find his way to a site that deals with his own personal issues, but if he insists on popping up here, let's be kind.If you can't be kind, then for the sake of your sisters, ignor.That's just my opinion, today,
    Cheers
    Dee
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    dyaneb123 said:

    Guys, why so cut and dried?
    Guys, why so cut and dried? If some members enjoy communicating with Mike , then they are free to do so.He obviously touched Tasha's heart, and I admire her generosity.To demand that he leave our site is a little overkill I think. If, like me, you find his posts a little "off", then IGNOR THEM....dont read them , dont respond to them....But we don't have to be unkind,he hasn't crossed any lines of acceptable behavior that I am aware of, and I think this is what is upsetting our sisters. I hope Mike will find his way to a site that deals with his own personal issues, but if he insists on popping up here, let's be kind.If you can't be kind, then for the sake of your sisters, ignor.That's just my opinion, today,
    Cheers
    Dee

    I totally
    agree with you Dee. And no I'm not spineless and jumping back and forth.
    That just makes a lot of sense,Dee! Thanks.
  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    The world is made up of all
    The world is made up of all kinds of people and personalities. So discussion boards will also. There will be 'flame wars' from time to time because that's just how it is. I can see the pro and cons and understand both sides. Maybe that's because I'm a Libra. But basicly I believe we shouldn't have to qualify to post. I do understand how some people can be uncomfortable. This is why I haven't taken a side. I can't. All of us has needs and I don't want to be the one to say one need is more important than someone else's. So I've stayed out of the discussion.
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    dyaneb123 said:

    Guys, why so cut and dried?
    Guys, why so cut and dried? If some members enjoy communicating with Mike , then they are free to do so.He obviously touched Tasha's heart, and I admire her generosity.To demand that he leave our site is a little overkill I think. If, like me, you find his posts a little "off", then IGNOR THEM....dont read them , dont respond to them....But we don't have to be unkind,he hasn't crossed any lines of acceptable behavior that I am aware of, and I think this is what is upsetting our sisters. I hope Mike will find his way to a site that deals with his own personal issues, but if he insists on popping up here, let's be kind.If you can't be kind, then for the sake of your sisters, ignor.That's just my opinion, today,
    Cheers
    Dee

    Thank you Dee
    Very nicely put. It was nothing personal, I would protect any of my cyber family who I felt was being treated unjustly.
    I have problems with one of the regular posters in here but I simply ignore her posts, I wish she would do likewise. But even her I would not see treated badly.
    Marcia......Flame Wars! Great description of these flare-ups we have in here.
    Hugs to all. However you vote. Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
    tasha_111 said:

    Thank you Dee
    Very nicely put. It was nothing personal, I would protect any of my cyber family who I felt was being treated unjustly.
    I have problems with one of the regular posters in here but I simply ignore her posts, I wish she would do likewise. But even her I would not see treated badly.
    Marcia......Flame Wars! Great description of these flare-ups we have in here.
    Hugs to all. However you vote. Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    so now I know why you don't
    so now I know why you don't respond to my posts... hum.... did I swallow a guppie??
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
    mimivac said:

    Wow
    Well, a lot of strong feeling have been expressed here. I don't believe that any feeding frenzy is going on. CR and others have been extremely respectful and honest in stating their discomfort with Mike's presence here. That's legitimate. As far as I can tell, no one called Mike a pervert or a liar. We are taking him at his word that he had a cancer scare and was subsequently found NED. The fact that his posts are offending many members here is another story and something to be addressed openly. Personally, I don't believe Mike is a good fit for this site. It's not about being a man or being NED. In my opinion, his posts create a lot of drama without being relevant to our mission here of supporting women with breast cancer. I also think he has issues that cannot be addressed in this group. I know people disagree and some find him supportive. I also don't believe that anyone is "ordering" him to leave. But expressions of discomfort with Mike's posts are perfectly legitimate without being nasty. Discussion and dissent are normal parts of any close group of people who care deeply about each other.

    I sincerely hope that people on either side of this debate do not leave this family. That would indeed be a tragedy, because we all need each other. I would be devastated if Tasha, CR, Debi, Teena, Outdoor Girl, or anyone else in this debate left. Please don't do that. Let's have our discussion respectfully like we're doing and continue to support each other in the meantime.

    I truly wish Mike well, as does everyone who here who has expressed an opinion. Being NED is a gift.

    Mimi

    Mimi, you are so right!
    Mimi, I wish that people would read all of the posts carefully. Noone was being mean or hateful, as you said. Everything was written calmly and quite admirably. Where the feeding frenzy comes in, I have no idea. It was just a lot of the bc suvivors who HAVE or HAD bc stating their discomfort and asking politely for a person who does NOT have bc to find a site more suitable to his needs. I agree with you Mimi that he is not a good fit for this site. As you said, his issues can be addressed better elsewhere. I don't understand why some can't see that if you read ALL of his posts. And, if you haven't read ALL of them, please do. Seriously, a man who has and is thinking of killing his wife does not fit on a breast cancer site. I find that very apalling and degrading at the least to women. I wish him the best, but, a breast cancer site for a man that does NOT have bc is not the place. It just seems odd...sorry! I hope everyone has a good day!

    Kristin

    ps: some say they don't see where he has had unacceptable behavior. so, wanting to kill your wife and posting about it on a breast cancer site is acceptable?
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    dyaneb123 said:

    Guys, why so cut and dried?
    Guys, why so cut and dried? If some members enjoy communicating with Mike , then they are free to do so.He obviously touched Tasha's heart, and I admire her generosity.To demand that he leave our site is a little overkill I think. If, like me, you find his posts a little "off", then IGNOR THEM....dont read them , dont respond to them....But we don't have to be unkind,he hasn't crossed any lines of acceptable behavior that I am aware of, and I think this is what is upsetting our sisters. I hope Mike will find his way to a site that deals with his own personal issues, but if he insists on popping up here, let's be kind.If you can't be kind, then for the sake of your sisters, ignor.That's just my opinion, today,
    Cheers
    Dee

    Ignoring posts that you
    Ignoring posts that you don't care for is the perfect solution. Love it Dee.
    Stef
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    taleena said:

    so now I know why you don't
    so now I know why you don't respond to my posts... hum.... did I swallow a guppie??

    Not You
    You Daft Sod! It isn't you.......she knows who she is..LOL

    Huge Hugs Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • ladybug22
    ladybug22 Member Posts: 646
    tasha_111 said:

    Margo
    Thank you......

    This is just not right. People in a certain predicament ordering other people maybe of a certain predicament out of the room?

    This is becoming the sort of site I really don't want to be associated with.

    I wish I knew how to send an email in here............One would certainly be going out to Mike.......

    I joined well after my treatments, I'm glad I did now.

    Would everyone be so hurtful if he had been a woman?

    Maybe I don't belong here either.........J

    life is to short for all this
    All i want to say is i dont have breast cancer anymore do i need to leave as well. hugs
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    ladybug22 said:

    life is to short for all this
    All i want to say is i dont have breast cancer anymore do i need to leave as well. hugs

    No ladybug
    you don't! I don't know all of the circumstances with Mike,but we are all trying to put this all behind us now. That's why no one is posting on this thread anymore.
    I've been a cancer survivor of 2 years and I got on here after I had finished my treatments and was declared NED so yes,if I can stay on here-so can you!
  • ManWithaMission
    ManWithaMission Member Posts: 497

    Hey Everybody,
    After reading some of your posts and discussing it with Robin, I have decided NOT to cut all ties. I know I can provide support and there IS a very small area of commonality. I won't proclaim that I know what it is like to through what all of you have gone through, but I do have a little experience as a caregiver and I never will be "totally out of the woods" with my family history and risk factors. If anything, I need to be here just to remain vigilant Also I can't really leave JUST YET... I don't know the outcome of the surgeon appt. For all I know he will do a biopsy?!?! I AM relieved at this point, yet with a smidgen of doubt. After all I have read posts where things were missed. Thank you for the invitation and to my detractors... I promise to "behave myself"! I had talked to Gretta at ACS and she sugested I bolg my LONG vents and stories. SO if I feel the need to vent or describe something it will be in my blog. Thanks again!!!
    HUGS,
    Mike
    AKA MUD!

    The1percent
    Let me start out by saying that I am a Male Breast Cancer survivor and I would also like for you to leave this site because you are a disruptive force here. As most of the ladies have said here,"You have not walked in our shoes!" Yes, I know you had a "scare" and wanted to talk about maybe having "IT", but now you know that you don't have "IT" and it has been suggested that you find a "support group" that deals with your situations. Which I understand is a caregiver to your father with prostate cancer. They have a very good Prostate cancer discussion board on this Cancer Survivor Network.(I think you should be more worried about getting that "beast" than this one.)

    As for being a "disruptive force" here, these ladies have had a few "intrusions" before and they banded together to defend themselves from the disharmoney it caused. I know first hand of this because I had my "head handed to me" once on this board when I talked about cheating husbands.(I still love all you ladies who disagreed with me though.)You can not heal with disruptive forces at work here. Everyone has the right to disagree with something or someone every now and then,but it should not be so all consuming.Say your peace,deal with it in your own way and then MOVE ON! Don't dwell. I have been doing a lot of dwelling lateley, but that is another post.

    As for "forceing people to leave" this site, I beleave that if it is disruptive or diturbing to the vast majority here that this person or persons SHOULD be asked politely to cease and desist or to move to another "more suitable" site for them. I do not think that someone should be "kicked off" a site because one or two people disagree with them. Afterall, this IS America and majority rules! I also don't belive that long time survivors should leave either. Why should you be "chased" away from the one thing you love and need more than them. Ladies, don't take everything on here to heart,it is way to easy to get that heart broken. Then it takes longer for you to trust someone new who may need your infinite knowlege,love and support. Good advice,"Learn to ignore it!"

    I belive that everyone involved in this should take a step back,take a deep breath and shake it off before starting anew. I hope "The1percen" will do the right thing,the honest thing and move on. If he still wants to correspond with some ladies on here(or they with him),it has been suggested that thay do it by Private Messages or by e-mail. I think that is a very solid suggestion. I also strongly belive that what is sent in PM should stay in PM! That is the fastest way to loose anybody's trust,by betraying it! What is said on this site is honest,sensitive and vulnerable without unwritten loyalty and absolute trust on the part of the reader!

    Well, I think I have put in enough of my thoughts and feelings into this post for now, ladies. I hope and pray that this situation gets resolved soon and things get back to normal love and support for others who are walking this path together.

    Sincerely, Robert
    One of The Real 1%!