Over Freakin Whelmed, AGAIN.

blueroses said:

Cute story Pink
Did you buy the new gloves anywho? Thanks for the cheering up. I am not in as bad a shape - overwhelming wise - as I was when I started thread, you know how it is this kind of phase comes and goes. What started me back to a saner moment was just plodding along and doing one thing at a time even if all the steps did depend on the one before. Most of it fell into place somehow as I went along but dates for the procedures are still hinging on my dental appt on Monday afternoon next week. The other procedure (stone) is set for March 16th but first I need to see the nurses in pre op re the anesthesia so that will be when I can ask my key questions on 2 knock out drugs in a short period of time, my heart being the worry. The thing is that it's conflicting info from the 2 cardiologists and GP and the anaestheologist that did my last tooth, the knock out doc wouldnt do the general anaesthetic and everyone else said no problem. Wish they would get their acts together and their stories straight. Anywho I am not really much further ahead but have calmed down the confused state by, like I said, doing one thing at a time and amazingly some things have sorted themselves out. Blessings, Blueroses.

HI Slickwilly and Blue
Slickwilly I can relate to the energy with prednisone not only was I agitated and could not sleep I had claustrophobia~ hubby would find me sitting outside or walking in the yard all night. I logged a lot of miles LOL. prednisone is scary stuff~ my last chemo treatment the doc reduced it when I told her that my hubby and I were driving down the interstate and I wondered what he would do if I opened the door. That really scared me. Am grateful that is over!
Blue~ No I did not buy the gloves~ laughing here. I know that time gives a person a more balanced perspective but on those overwhelming days nothing is in perspective. I too do one thing at a time. If I try to do more I find things undone because I have forgotten that I was doing it. Was dusting just a few minutes ago and got side tracked and had to hunt for the duster lol. Why it was in the kitchen I will never know. I like doing the cleaning etc when hubby is not home as being sidetracked is my way of life. Then later I see that I have not finished what I started. It would drive him crazy. I think it is funny and I am getting used to it. So far I have not put anything strange in the refrigerator if hubby is the one who put the dishtowel in there. Ah the joys of chemo brain. Another thing, I have taken to calling people sweetie since I cannot remember their names. Usually their name will come to me after a while but sometimes it may take hours... I could go on and on but I had better stop here. Hope I livened someone's day! Hugs, Pnktopaz

blueroses said:

Chemo Brain or a Ghost?
Oh man. We have a little grocery store in the basement of our apartment complex and yesterday when I came back from the cardiologist I stopped in there to get some things for supper. They have a new debit machine where the customer puts the card in but then of course the customer HAS TO REMEMBER TO TAKE IT OUT. SIGH. Which of course I didn't do. Just realized it and the store isn't open after lunch for a few more minutes. Have been going nuts having to wait to see if it's there or some jerk stole it. It is one with a brand new chip in it so harder to use. I don't want to cancel it if he has it downstairs but he knows me and would have called if someone had turned it in. Then while I was waiting to call about the card I got my VISA card to see if there was a bank number on it in case I had to cancel my other card. Walked into another room and came back and COULDN'T FIND THE FREAKIN VISA CARD NOW. SIGHHHHHHHHH. Took me half an hour to find it, finally did though. For I minute there I started thinking, hmmm wonder if there is a mischevious ghost in here or something, lol. Whats worse chemo brain or a ghost? I'm rooting for a ghost methinks. lol. See ya, Blueroses.SIGH.

making progress
It seems we have quite a few things in common here. I have been fighting a cold and the caughing is killing my neck. Along with the rest of my body that feels like a truck hit it. So I have been on some pain killers and I hope everyone understands if slickwilly seems to be losing it. Blue your making progress with your small steps. I know that you have been through enough and I am sorry that you have to go through more operations. I hope they can find a safe option for working on you. This is not like T.V. where they remove parts, drill holes and try 10 seperate drugs to cure someone and everything is just fine at the end of the show. If Dr House was a real doctor all of his patients would be on disability with me. My wife and I went to get some food and my General Doctor walked up to say hi. He wanted to know if my daughter was doing ok with her cold. My GP is quite special. He just turned 60 years old and has been my doctor for 30 years. I was sitting in a hospital room getting my 9 1/2 hours of chemo a few years back. I was alone as most of the staff had left and my chemo took so long. My GP was doing rounds and saw me so he stopped in for two hours. Yes, he sat with me for two hours! He talked about diagnosing five patients in a two month period with cancer. Here I was plugged into chemo and my doctor was crying. I felt worse for him than I did for myself. I could not ask for a more caring doctor then the one I have. There are some people in this world that you would trust with your life. I hope you have that faith in your cardiologist Blue and know they would go the extra mile to make sure your safe. Bless you Slickwilly

Pnktopaz10 said:

Chemo brain or ghost
Depends on if the ghost is friendly or not...lol. I hope that you got your card back and will not have to go through the hassle of canceling and getting a new one. After I read your post I thought about going and checking to see if I had all my cards but I have not used them so I am safe..or am I? Now I will need to check.

It was refreshing to read Slicks story about his GP. Sometimes we need a reminder that doctor's are human.

Off to check my credit cards. Hugs to all, Pnktopaz

Steroids yuk
I am trying to eat better Linda, I found one nurse said about staying away from sugar and bad carbs makes cancer grow. I have taken steroids off and on with chemo but this time I feel bloated. I am swollen from my high cancer count but this bloating seems to be tight and as I took this chemo etopiside and the steroids. Yes I get irritated with the steroids. So if I sound short tempered forgive me. MY brother Blue only had the flashbacks a couple times but he does take anti depressents. But most of the time he is a carefree happy person who has really been here for me since my husband passed. Hes helped me with my house and getting things done. Thanks everyone for being here. I am having a bad day
Prayers and Hugs
Sandy

Pnktopaz10 said:

HI Slickwilly and Blue
Slickwilly I can relate to the energy with prednisone not only was I agitated and could not sleep I had claustrophobia~ hubby would find me sitting outside or walking in the yard all night. I logged a lot of miles LOL. prednisone is scary stuff~ my last chemo treatment the doc reduced it when I told her that my hubby and I were driving down the interstate and I wondered what he would do if I opened the door. That really scared me. Am grateful that is over!
Blue~ No I did not buy the gloves~ laughing here. I know that time gives a person a more balanced perspective but on those overwhelming days nothing is in perspective. I too do one thing at a time. If I try to do more I find things undone because I have forgotten that I was doing it. Was dusting just a few minutes ago and got side tracked and had to hunt for the duster lol. Why it was in the kitchen I will never know. I like doing the cleaning etc when hubby is not home as being sidetracked is my way of life. Then later I see that I have not finished what I started. It would drive him crazy. I think it is funny and I am getting used to it. So far I have not put anything strange in the refrigerator if hubby is the one who put the dishtowel in there. Ah the joys of chemo brain. Another thing, I have taken to calling people sweetie since I cannot remember their names. Usually their name will come to me after a while but sometimes it may take hours... I could go on and on but I had better stop here. Hope I livened someone's day! Hugs, Pnktopaz

hi everyone, i have just
hi everyone, i have just finished my second "breakdown" this weekend. honestly, i am so vulnerable. i had asked my husband to put up some curtain rods for the new curtains that i had bought for our bedroom. well, i couldn't find the curtains anywhere. they certainly were not where i thought i had put them. i can't remember anything! i am so frustrated and scared by this that i can't deal with anything. i am so overwhelmed. of course my husband's health may have something to do with it. he had a prostate biopsy, that luckily proved to be negative. i am different since i had chemo and radiation. i can't seem to multi task, remember anything have a hard time with work retrieval etc. and i don't feel well, the aromasin makes me hyper and the fatigue YUK! in fact i am sick of the whole thing! sorry for the venting but god, who else understands this business.hugs, peggy

tasha_111 said:

Peggy
This is classic Chemo-Brain. Look it up on the Mayo Clinic website. It is awful and you think you are going mad, but it does get better. Hugs for You........Jxxxxxxxxx

Chemo brain for me today
I know Peggy it is frustrating when you don't remember and part of the time you are in a fog. I Have been taking these "wonder meds" off and on for seven years. I had taken some wed thur and fri this past week. But it does get better when you get the breaks. I try not to do to much on my foggy days. But I have had my reading glasses on my head looking for them hmm.
Hope things get better for ya. Big Hug and lots of prayer
SAndy

blueroses said:

Chemo Brain or a Ghost?
Oh man. We have a little grocery store in the basement of our apartment complex and yesterday when I came back from the cardiologist I stopped in there to get some things for supper. They have a new debit machine where the customer puts the card in but then of course the customer HAS TO REMEMBER TO TAKE IT OUT. SIGH. Which of course I didn't do. Just realized it and the store isn't open after lunch for a few more minutes. Have been going nuts having to wait to see if it's there or some jerk stole it. It is one with a brand new chip in it so harder to use. I don't want to cancel it if he has it downstairs but he knows me and would have called if someone had turned it in. Then while I was waiting to call about the card I got my VISA card to see if there was a bank number on it in case I had to cancel my other card. Walked into another room and came back and COULDN'T FIND THE FREAKIN VISA CARD NOW. SIGHHHHHHHHH. Took me half an hour to find it, finally did though. For I minute there I started thinking, hmmm wonder if there is a mischevious ghost in here or something, lol. Whats worse chemo brain or a ghost? I'm rooting for a ghost methinks. lol. See ya, Blueroses.SIGH.

Ghost?
This has nothing to do with chemo brain but I thought you might like to hear about this story blue. A few years ago I had gone to Gettysburg with my parents. The last night we spent there we had decided to get up in the morning and go to Hershey, PA. Well that morning when we woke up my father told us about a "dream" he had the night before. Or was it a dream? He said that his father, who has been dead for quite a few years at that point had come beside the bed and told him that he didn't want us to go to Hershey. My mother and I played it off and told him it was only a dream. Well when we were done packing we went to take our luggage to the car but the car keys were not where my mother had placed them. We tore both their room and mine (connected rooms) apart trying to find the car keys. Everything was moved the beds were torn apart, etc. finally after an hour my mom looks on the table again, where she had originally placed them and where we looked several more times, and the keys were there. We decided to still go to Hershey but drive cautiously. On our way there we had heard about a car accident that occured on the road we were taking!! So now we look upon it that grandpa was our guardian angel that day and when he realized we were not going to change our minds about going to Hershey he delayed us. Pretty freaky.

Cindy

blueroses said:

Maxed out
Sounds like you are maxed out emotionally, no more room in the old grey matter for one more thing, I know the feeling well. Not only are you a patient but a caregiver too, that must be incredibly difficult. If you can see your GP perhaps he/she can suggest something to get you through the toughest points and if you don't like the idea of medications then if you could just take some time to yourself doing something you love to do and out of the house with a friend say, I think you would start to feel a bit better. Even just going for a walk can help to clear your head. I continue to be overwhelmed off and on with all my medical situations and sometimes I just shut off, cancel things and regroup. Sometimes it works as does trying to deal with just one thing at a time. When the phone rings here it's always only docs and new appointments and procedures, I hate answering the phone now. Anything you love to do to get your mind off problems and onto something more pleasant will perhaps give you a bit of a respite. Hope you are feeling better today. Blessings, Blueroses.

Peggy
I too am sorry that you are having a hard time of it. Chemo brain is very frustrating. I went to my 40th class reunion and do not remember a thing about it. My retirement party is a blur. i spend half my time looking for stuff because I cannot remember where I put it. Multi-task forget it. But, I am here to tell you that it is getting better. Baby steps. My fog is slowly lifting and with it my frustration. What I have found to be helpful is to play scrabble or something like that`it makes me think. Blue is right to do what you love to get your mind off of problems. Even if it is just for a little bit of time it really does help. Hugs, Pnktopaz

blueroses said:

Oh this should be good
Today the Memory Clinic has made an appointment to see me, hope they are all well rested to try and take all my medical info and come up with an answer. I am not holding my breath. Should be interesting. The appt. isn't til the end of March. Keep you posted. They are pretty thorough, they have you do a 9 page questionnaire about your health and when you get to the clinic they interview you again on it all then you have to have blood drawn then you have to leave a urine sample. Then you bug off and a few months later you come in to see a doctor who is supposed to go over results with you. Oh boy. Later, Blueroses

You'll like THIS one, Blue:
I'm sitting in the Geisinger Cancer clinic with my chemo being pumped into my veins today and my cell phone rings. Guess who? Geisinger Financial! I tell them I am at the clinic getting my chemo; they push on regardless.

HOSPITAL $$ GUY: "Was I aware that on January 1 the new year started and I must again pay my $7,500 annual deductible?"

ME: "That's not the kind of thing I could forget."

HOSPITAL $$ GUY: "Well, you have been getting treatments without having paid that deductible and we need a check from you in that amount."

ME: "I don't think we ever got a bill from you for that from the first January treament, but I can't double-check right now because I have an chemo IV in my arm and am not home."

HOSPITAL $$ GUY: "We wouldn't have billed you personally for that; we billed your insurance. But they won't pay anything until your annual deductible is met. We need your bank routing numbers so you can make a direct cash transfer immediately."

ME: "Here's my husband's cell number. Talk to the man." CLICK.

(Of course my husband immediately did the electronic transfer as soon as we got home from chemo. But really, wouldn't you expect an INVOICE from SOMEONE before you cut a check for $7,500! And the hospital's financial guy was so upset that I was, AT THAT MOMENT, getting $16,000 worth of chemo RIGHT THEN that my insurance company wouldn't pay for until the deductible was met!! HA! HA! HA! I mean, REALLY! They got my $7,500 deductible for 2008; and my insurance has been paying like clockwork, so why should they be freaked out for the 2009 deductible?)

It's not chemo brain; it;s just that they've DRIVEN US CRAZY!!!