Still overwhelmed

Boy, do I know how you feel! I'm 29 & had a rad/hyst & int/ext rads. It is hard to deal w/ the loss of reproductin (esp when all our friends are busy having kids) not to mention the whole hormonal thing! I try to keep it in perspective- I not only am *alive* but I have managed to start rebuilding my life- which is key. Do you have a counsler? I found that has helped me a great deal. I can explore my fears & new hopes w/ my counsler w/o having to burden my family & friends, who, luckily, don't really understand what it is like to be a cancer survivor. I think it's harder on us 21-39 folks sometimes because we're forgotten. Our friends haven't started down the road of sickness & loss that older (40+) experience and we're not kids, so everyone expects us to keep our chins up and go forward. I understand the fear of it coming back as well. Please email me if you want to discuss it further- would be happy to talk about it.
(((())))
Chris

I was SO relieved to read your messages. I am now 28, and at 26 had small cell of the cervix which resulted in intense chemo, radical hysterectomy (kept my ovaries) and external radiation. I was thrown into menopause immediately upon finding out that I had cancer. When I entered remission last November, my husband decided that he didn't want to be married anymore - on top of everything else! So not only was I a young cancer survivor with the every day fear of it returning, I was also a single woman in menopause at 26! I never had any children either, and no one seems to understand how difficult that aspect is. We are at a place physically that our mothers and their friends are. We are dealing with the HRT issues that only women 55+ are supposed to be worried about. And on top of that, we can never bear a child. I agree 100% that our age group is one that is forgotten about, and it's so unfair because you're right - we're not at the age where our friends are dying and we're faced with death. I have yet to find anyone who understands what I'm talking about when I try to explain the way I'm feeling, so I am SO relieved to hear from you all.
I am terrified of dymentia and osteoperosis setting in extremely early because of the young age that I entered menopause. My chemo doc told me that if I didn't stay on HRT that I would be a pretzel by the age of 50 because of my early entry into meno. I've not heard of any studies done on women our age dealing with menopause and what happens to them later in life. I would love to read something of that nature.

Thank you so much for making me feel that I'm not alone in this struggle!! That means so much...

-Whitney

whitneyd74 said:

I was SO relieved to read your messages. I am now 28, and at 26 had small cell of the cervix which resulted in intense chemo, radical hysterectomy (kept my ovaries) and external radiation. I was thrown into menopause immediately upon finding out that I had cancer. When I entered remission last November, my husband decided that he didn't want to be married anymore - on top of everything else! So not only was I a young cancer survivor with the every day fear of it returning, I was also a single woman in menopause at 26! I never had any children either, and no one seems to understand how difficult that aspect is. We are at a place physically that our mothers and their friends are. We are dealing with the HRT issues that only women 55+ are supposed to be worried about. And on top of that, we can never bear a child. I agree 100% that our age group is one that is forgotten about, and it's so unfair because you're right - we're not at the age where our friends are dying and we're faced with death. I have yet to find anyone who understands what I'm talking about when I try to explain the way I'm feeling, so I am SO relieved to hear from you all.
I am terrified of dymentia and osteoperosis setting in extremely early because of the young age that I entered menopause. My chemo doc told me that if I didn't stay on HRT that I would be a pretzel by the age of 50 because of my early entry into meno. I've not heard of any studies done on women our age dealing with menopause and what happens to them later in life. I would love to read something of that nature.

Thank you so much for making me feel that I'm not alone in this struggle!! That means so much...

-Whitney

I was diagnosed wiht Cervical cancer at 27. On Valentine's Day. I did not need chemo or radiation but I did have a radical Hysterectomy. I still have my ovaries and my husband and I have talked about harvesting my eggs and having my sister carry the child. I know it's a pipe dream and will probably not happen. I found several issues that have been hard for me to deal with. First, I did not need chemo or radiation. Hurray, right? Well after the surgery, people (coworkers, etc) figured that I was healed. But there were so many painful issues that no one seemed to understand. For example, when you have outward signs people respect the healing process. I felt that I was not a true survivor (don't worry, I got over it-- THERAPY).Then I had to mourn the life I thought that I would have. Kids, you know. I still have a hard time. Everyone says "Oh, you can adopt" Yeah, but what about the Thousands of Dollars? What about the rejection from the birthmothers when you go thorugh an agency because you're not thin enough, or rich enough, or look good enough. (I'm not bitter, really). No thanks. Not yet.
It's been three years and I still feel a little left out. I know, I've been in and through counseling, but come on. Those issues don't go away. You just learn to deal with them.
I don't want to sound like a bitter horrible person. I'm not. I was diagnosed with stage one Cervical cancer in February 2000. I had the surgery, I recovered quickly with little to no complications. I was married to a wonderful man who proposed to me during my recovery. We've bought a house and are saving for a child. I joke about us buying a baby from China. he he. I've returned to support groups and have begun Volunteering. I have been active in Relay and I get a lot of pleasure out of these activities. I love the freedom that I have now. I no longer need any feminine hygeine products and that is sooooooo great. I'd love to hear from more survivors who are dealing with not only Cervical Cancer but reproductive issues at a young age.

whitneyd74 said:

I was SO relieved to read your messages. I am now 28, and at 26 had small cell of the cervix which resulted in intense chemo, radical hysterectomy (kept my ovaries) and external radiation. I was thrown into menopause immediately upon finding out that I had cancer. When I entered remission last November, my husband decided that he didn't want to be married anymore - on top of everything else! So not only was I a young cancer survivor with the every day fear of it returning, I was also a single woman in menopause at 26! I never had any children either, and no one seems to understand how difficult that aspect is. We are at a place physically that our mothers and their friends are. We are dealing with the HRT issues that only women 55+ are supposed to be worried about. And on top of that, we can never bear a child. I agree 100% that our age group is one that is forgotten about, and it's so unfair because you're right - we're not at the age where our friends are dying and we're faced with death. I have yet to find anyone who understands what I'm talking about when I try to explain the way I'm feeling, so I am SO relieved to hear from you all.
I am terrified of dymentia and osteoperosis setting in extremely early because of the young age that I entered menopause. My chemo doc told me that if I didn't stay on HRT that I would be a pretzel by the age of 50 because of my early entry into meno. I've not heard of any studies done on women our age dealing with menopause and what happens to them later in life. I would love to read something of that nature.

Thank you so much for making me feel that I'm not alone in this struggle!! That means so much...

-Whitney

i am glad your still clear of the cancer i also have had the small cell cervical thats rare i cant find much information on it can you help? if you ever want to talk call me 9094852944 kim is my name

Hi, I am 45 and near the end of my internal/external treatments. I had a radical hysterectomy done with complications. I am in pain everyday and wonder if I will ever feel like the person I once was. Then I know I am not the same. My husband has been a trooper through all this but it is really hard to make him and family truly understand how you feel. I am far from home to because we have no specialists in the state I live so I had to go elsewhere. I have not seen home for three months and my mental wellness is slowly diminishing. I am scared what the future holds for me and my husband. The thing I have hated through this whole ordeal is the vague answers you get from medical personnel or sometimes, not even the truth. No one to date has really sat down with me and said, " this is what you had, this is what is being done, and this is your possible future." I am just another chart number to most.