R-chop advice

po18guy said:

Sorry to hear this

Until diagnosis, we cannot be certain of what it is - no matter what it appears to be. Cancer mimics other diseases and other diseases mimic cancer. Having said thart, can she staty with you, or is treatment too far away? if so, then it is time for a bro-sis meeting andask all of them to step up.

But, lets see what the actual diagnosis is and proceed from there.

Thank you! we know it's B cell lymphoma just waiting on confirmation of the type. I know I'm getting ahead of myself but making plans for all the possabilities helps me channel some of my anxiety. Im hoping she will come stay with me but I know she likes her own things when she doesn't feel well. My brother and sister are great so I am sure we will figure out whatever we need to do. I guess I'm just trying to figure out if this is the case, if I stay with her for a bit after treatment is it realistic to think she might be ok on her own for a week or two each month if we stop by and help with things or is that not likely to work? Is it more likely that she'll need someone there full time (or to stay with us)? But it sounds like we'll just have to wait and see. Thanks again for your reply

ShadyGuy said:

I can’t help

with R Chop . Both of my chemos were other than RCHOP.

I'm sorry you had to go through chemo at all. If anything general comes to mind that helped you or if there are things that maybe you wish people hadn't done(even if trying to be helpful).... that's always good to know to! 

PBL said:

Managing during R-CHOP

Hi,

I had 6 R-CHOP in 2016. Max has more or less given you an outline and some resources on that regimen. I will only add at this point that I was about twenty years younger than your mother at the time, and it felt like I had been run over by a bus. This may be because I was quite in pain and fatigued, and also because it was a very, very long first day, with the infusion ending in the middle of the night (between two and three a.m.). I was also hit hard by side effects from the start - but we'll save that for later, when you know for a fact that this will be the treatment prescribed to your mother.

R-CHOP is considered fairly harsh chemotherapy, and rather than describing the first infusion as mild, I would say that the effects are cumulative, which means that infusion #5 or 6 will be harder on the body than #1 or 2.

That being said, there are also psychological and emotional aspects to consider, and because this is a jump into the unknown it is likely that your mother will need more reassuring presence for the first couple of cycles, while she will find her routine for the remainder of her treatment.

You have stated that your mother lives alone, so I assume she is autonomous and independent. If I had had to pick between staying at home with my daughter sleeping over for a few nights or being a guest at my daughter's place, I am quite certain I would have preferred staying home in my familiar environment, using my own bedroom and bathroom. However, everyone is different, and this is a conversation I would encourage you to have with your mother - but if it is all the same to you in terms of your organization, I would suggest offering to sleep over at her place the first few nights, just to reassure her if she feels she may need that.

I hope this answers your question for now. Do let us know how things develop.
PBL

Thank you, that is very helpful. We just met with the oncologist ans it turns out it is a bit more aggressive than we had hoped, double hit lymphoma and she'll be on R-EPOCH instead, starting in just over a week. We'll be making plans this weekend but I think I'll be staying with her for at least the start and we will see how things go from there, I appreciate your thoughts on that! 

Evarista said:

Handling her DA-R-EPOCH

Hi Evie, agressive DLBCL R-EPOCH survivor here.  So, so sorry she has to go through this.  My recommendation would be to be prepared for a wide range of circumstances.  She may go from perfectly OK to diapers & bedbaths, at least some of the time. I certainly did and there is absolutely no way that I could have managed on my own (age 68 & reasonably fit before getting ill). There is a lot to consider and being with her after the first round should provide you with a good sense of what needs to be attended to.  Not just the "activities of daily living", but getting back and forth to outpatient clinic for Neulasta shots, CT/PET scans, twice weekly blood draws.  What to do if she spikes a fever or has a fall. Food prep. I hate be overly negative, but an ounce of prevention is super-important for her.

I am more than happy to discuss the finer details of what to expect, so please do feel free to send me a private message if you would like (you do that by clicking on my name).  Best of luck with it.

Edited to add:  4 years out and doing well.

I am so glad to hear you are 4 years out and doing well I appreciate the frankness, it's going to be what it is going to be and I agree the more we know ahead of time without sugar coating the better. I will take you up on that offer and reach out with a PM. Thank you!!