Living Single with One Breast

Dolphins67
Dolphins67 Member Posts: 1
in Breast Cancer #1

Is there anyone else who didn't have reconstruction that is single, and only has one breast? This isn't something that is talked about much. I also have Young Onset Parkinson's, so I now have two things I have to tell someone if I find someone I am interested in.  I have simply chosen not to date, but I don't want to live this life alone. God is a big part of my life, and I am thankful for that, but I wish I had someone to share life with. I am wondering if there is anyone who met their husband after a mastectomy without reconstruction.

Comments

  • PragmaticP
    PragmaticP Member Posts: 1
    #2
    Living with one breast.

    I am over 65 and quit having sexual encounters LOL after my last divorce. When my right breast was removed I had to adjust in my own mind how to look at it. It had to go or I could die and I never was more than a Bcup and didn't have much use for it anymore. Luckily I am a jeans kind of gal and I don't wear a bra unless I am dressing for a Major event not just going out to eat. When I do wear a bra I use a Knitted Knocker with a silver dollar in it to give it good movement inside my sport type bra. If I lost an arm or a leg I would have to have something to help me get by, but a breast is just a cosmetic inconvenience that I don't think about much anymore.  When someone comments on it. sometimes I say "Where is it? Darn, I lost it again." and we both laugh. I think getting it rebuilt or having the other removed would be like a funeral, it isn't for the person who lost it, but mostly for other people uncomfortable with it. Everybody needs to do what makes them feel ok about it. That's just not me.  And I can deal with only getting 1/2 as many beads at Mardi Gras.

     

  • Elaine_wi
    Elaine_wi Member Posts: 124 Member
    #3
    Hope and Inspiration

    Perhaps the story of Nick Vujicic will inspire you and restore your hope. Here's a link to a youtube video of one of his interviews, "Nick Vujicic: 60 Minutes Interview - No limbs, No limits".

    Copy and paste:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emcK-FE7bDs

  • Barb A
    Barb A Member Posts: 123
    #4
    Acceptance of yourself first

    Hi, I've had breast cancer twice. The first time in 2000, I had the right breast removed with a Tram Flap reconstruction. I was fairly thin back then. My recurrance was in the reconstructed breast, so had a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. I've since gained some weight and now have to wear a prostetic breast to even them out.

    My first diagnosis, I was just engaged to my now husband. I gave him an out, but he stayed. The second diagnosis, the same thing. He told me it wasn't my breasts he wanted to be with. This all started for me when I was 37. I will be 56 in April. If I had to do it all over again, I'd rather just have had both breasts removed and no reconstruction. Everything went well for me, but at this age, boobs and bras are just a pain. As soon as I'm home from work, I can't wait for the bra to come off and my husband doesn't care. I have thought about removing the left breast, just don't feel like going through surgery again.

    If I had to deal with someone else and he didn't want to see me the way I am, I wouldn't want to be with him anyway. If for your own benefit, if/when the time comes for sex, you could always wear a sexy tank top until you're comfortable in front of the guy. By the way PragmaticP, I love your answer with the Knitted Knocker/silver dollar.

    Best wishes,

    Barb

     

     

  • Kathy0727
    Kathy0727 Member Posts: 2
    edited May 2019 #5
    Just one breast

    i had my right breast removed and didn’t want reconstruction.  I tried to get the. To take both but was told there was good tissue in the left breast. ??  I’m overweight and was 62 when I had my mastectomy.  I wasn’t concerned about anyone having a problem with it and figured if someone did, I wouldn’t want anything to do with them anyway. I took early retirement after my surgery so I’m just wearing tee shirts and shorts (fla). It seems to bother my family more than me. If I don’t button my shirts up far enough, she tells me to button up because she can see my scar.  My scar is from a battle I fought and won. Soldiers don’t have a problem with that.  I do have a foam insert I wear if certain clothing makes me uncomfortable without it. Anyone wants to judge me, go for it. I’m old enough to not care what others think. 

  • Apaugh
    Apaugh Member Posts: 850 Member
    #6
    all is ok to me

    I had dbuble mastectomy.  I chose not to have reconstruction.  That was in March of 2016.  I am still fine with hit.  I dont wear anything and if my shirt dips low it is no big deal to my family.  Tell your family it is warrior scars and they should be in awe of them that you are a great fighter, a great warrior.   Tell them to get over themselves.   

    Hugs,

    Annie

  • Beepositive
    Beepositive Member Posts: 259 Member
    #7
    Hello Dolphins67

    Hello 1 BREAST IN NOT THE end all !! I started with expander after my left removal 2 yrs ago but had issues with the expander while radiation . Dr gave me other options to take skin from other areas and so on.  So I just decided not to do any type of implant!   my area is not flat due to expander removal and effects from radiation . I am so Glad I decided to just no do the implants...IT's not for everyone....I was fitted with some bras and inserts that my Insurance covered most of the bras...I wanted that so my clothes will look better and it makes me feel better.!!

    I AM ALSO HAVE A BOYFRIEND..i ALWAYS SLEEP IN MY BRAS ( SPECIAL BRA WITH INSERT THAT i WAS FITTED FOR THIS ONE IS A SPORTS BRA..CHECK WITH YOUR DOCTOR TO REFER YOU TO STORES THAT SUPPLY THE BRAS)   MY BOYFRIEND AND i ARE DOING GREAT!! HE KNOW IT ALL . so you should not feel less of a Woman because you only have  Breast ! Its who you are . Granted I was worried about it at first and how my boyfriend would react after my surgery and my decision..but he was very understanding and we are GREAT..if it was not i would have told he to GET TO STEPPING..because it not about him... my body and my decision ..my life!!  HUGS AND LOVE TO YOU....  also if you just start dating they dont need to know all that up front unless you see it is going some where.

    GOD BLESS   BEEpositive!!!

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