Just diagnosed and feeling...weird?

I was just diagnosed yesterday and I can’t get a handle on my feelings. Yesterday I felt sort of mellow about it all... Maybe I was in shock, or maybe it was just a relief to finally have a diagnosis - I’ve been trying to figure out what was wrong with me for nearly 5 months. (Turns out Ive got three unique conditions, all in the same area of my body. Confusing and painful.) Today I’m feeling much more anxiety, and an even greater sense that I just want to put my head in the sand and forget this is all going on. I certainly DON’T want to read all about my cancer and figure it all out. 

I guess “one day at a time” is the best philosophy for me right now. I’m somewhat alone with all this, in that I do live with family but I’m afraid I’m going to have to take care of their emotional needs. Maybe that’s keeping me from fully being present with what’s going on. I guess I’m looking for permission to take this in my own time.

Comments

  • GingerMay
    GingerMay Member Posts: 134
    Permission granted

    Of course take the time you need and go at your own pace. My husband was diagnosed two years ago and was certain they made a mistake. I believe it must be so overwhelming and getting your arms around it has to just take time. Like you, he has not had any interest in researching his cancer or becoming an expert on it like you so frequently see recommended.  I think that is OK too.   

    In my opinion, you are the one who is most important in all of this. Trust your gut and what feels right to you.  It is also OK to take it one day at a time.  What you say about having to support the emotional needs of those around you rings so true to me. Our friends just don't get it, my husband's family is absent, and my family freaks out and panics and makes it all about them. Taking on others "stuff" is one more burden he just doesn't need. It is isolating though. 

    As you go through the upcoming days, weeks and months I hope you find things that support you emotionally, mentally and physically. There's some good advice on this board and others may chime in on your post too. I wish these boards were more active, but there's a lot of good people here going through similar things who can relate. Sorry you are here, but feel free to post as often as you like.  Prayers and blessings to you.  

     

     

  • YiayiaV
    YiayiaV Member Posts: 2
    Ride the waves

    I'm sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. Whatever emotions YOU are feeling are valid. Your emotions will vacillate from one extreme to another and that's fine. Get all of the support you can muster.  I think my concern for the emotions of my adult children and my grandchildren kept me going. There is no right way to handle a cancer diagnosis. I was diagnosed January, 2017 and continue to 'ride the wave'.  I'm here on this sight for support and this is a good place to be.

    i dont know who said this but I firmly stand by it:

    'Everything will be alright in the end. If things aren't alright now - it must not be the end'.

    You will get through this.

  • Drtabby
    Drtabby Member Posts: 2
    edited October 2018 #4
    Help I’m sinking

    I just wrote a blog. Something I’ve never don.  I’m tired and confused and just don’t no where to turn. I’ve been talking care of my mom for 3 years now and can’t seem to even remember to call and make my own appointments. I haven’t done taxes since 2011. And haven’t done hers eithe. She’s gotten so much worse and now I’m going through this. I think I’m gonna give any treatments and just go. If I have to feel any worse then I do now it’s not worth livinG.