My dads first chemo treatment for Stage 4 colon cancer w/mets in liver and lung

MAMAJR
MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
edited February 2018 in Colorectal Cancer #1

My Dad finally started treatment after being diagnosed at the end of December 2017. He was told his heart was very weak but they went forward with Chemo anyway. I keep hearing negative things from different people like “Oh wow your Dad has stage 4 colon cancer and he decided to go through with chemo treatments?” Its almost like their saying WHATS THE POINT. Am I being too naive into thinking that my dad can live very long with Stage 4 colon cancer with Mets in lung and liver? Someone please respond and be honest. I want to stay as positive as possible but at this point I don’t know how to think anymore. 

Comments

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,796 Member
    How old is your dad?

    Is he 90?

    I would give anyone under 90 a fighting chance of beating the beast.  The truth is, nobody knows who is going to live or who is going to die.  

    I've been on the forum long enough to see some young, healthy folks succumb to the disease, and some of the older folks are here, fighting the fight, evan with a Stage IV diagnosis. 

    I say Stay positive. Stay positive because your dad needs that. You need that. Face death when it happens, but not before. 

    As for others 'What's the point' attitude. Ignore them. 

    Keep coming here. There are tons of loved ones fighting the battle and can help you help your father. And those of us who are patients, we will help as well. 

    Tru

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
    edited February 2018 #3
    Trubrit said:

    How old is your dad?

    Is he 90?

    I would give anyone under 90 a fighting chance of beating the beast.  The truth is, nobody knows who is going to live or who is going to die.  

    I've been on the forum long enough to see some young, healthy folks succumb to the disease, and some of the older folks are here, fighting the fight, evan with a Stage IV diagnosis. 

    I say Stay positive. Stay positive because your dad needs that. You need that. Face death when it happens, but not before. 

    As for others 'What's the point' attitude. Ignore them. 

    Keep coming here. There are tons of loved ones fighting the battle and can help you help your father. And those of us who are patients, we will help as well. 

    Tru

    Thank you so much!! This has

    Thank you so much!! This has been so hard on all of us and I just want my dad to do everything he can to fight through this. So since the doctor said he still can try chemo since surgery is not an option, I say do everything he can. My Dad is only 59.

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,796 Member
    Young

    Your dad is YOUNG. In fact, he is the same age as I am.

    I am sorry that he is dealing with a weakness of the heart, at such a young age, and hope that on its own can be treated.

    Definitely don't listen to anyone who thinks Stage IV is the end of the world. There are several, myself included, on this forum alone, that are living wonderful lives. Some are in the NED (no evidence of disease) stage. Some are on chemo for life, but doing well in spite of how bad that sounds. 

    Onward and upward.

    Tru

     

  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    Age

    With your dad only 59 he has a very good chance of fighting this.  Stage 4 isn't always a death sentence and medicine has come so far in the last 10-15 years.  Don't pay attention to those that are negative and stay positive for your father.  He can use your encouragement.  Please come back on the board and let us know how he is doing.  Make sure that he has someone with him when he goes to his doctor's appointments so that he has two sets of ears.  It's much better that he has a support system.  Wishing your dad the best.

    Kim

  • JanJan63
    JanJan63 Member Posts: 2,478 Member
    I think it's lack of

    I think it's lack of understanding. Stage four sounds like a death sentence but plenty of people are living and thriving with that diagnosis. I'm stage four and don't expect to be gone anytme soon. And I'll be 55 next month so your dad does not sound old to me. I'm told I'll never not have cancer, we'll just keep it at bay and I'll live with it like anyone with a chronic disease does. 

    What's the issue with his heart? Is it something treatable? And what chemo is he on?

    I knew so little about cancer before I got it and I've have thought the same, that stage four is the end. I thought everyone lost their hair. I thought you had chemo and it got rid of it or you'd die soon. Now I know a lot more than I ever wanted to.

    Take care and be strong for your dad. He has a fighting chance. 

    Jan

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
    Trubrit said:

    Young

    Your dad is YOUNG. In fact, he is the same age as I am.

    I am sorry that he is dealing with a weakness of the heart, at such a young age, and hope that on its own can be treated.

    Definitely don't listen to anyone who thinks Stage IV is the end of the world. There are several, myself included, on this forum alone, that are living wonderful lives. Some are in the NED (no evidence of disease) stage. Some are on chemo for life, but doing well in spite of how bad that sounds. 

    Onward and upward.

    Tru

     

    Thank you! I’m so happy I

    Thank you! I’m so happy I decided to join this discussion board because its So nice to hear from others that are dealing with or experiencing similar situation. Everyones stories truly inspire me and gives me hope. This is honestly the best form of therapy and coping for me. 

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21

    Age

    With your dad only 59 he has a very good chance of fighting this.  Stage 4 isn't always a death sentence and medicine has come so far in the last 10-15 years.  Don't pay attention to those that are negative and stay positive for your father.  He can use your encouragement.  Please come back on the board and let us know how he is doing.  Make sure that he has someone with him when he goes to his doctor's appointments so that he has two sets of ears.  It's much better that he has a support system.  Wishing your dad the best.

    Kim

    Thanks so much! I will do my

    Thanks so much! I will do my best to keep Positive and I will definitely keep posting about my dads journey 

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
    JanJan63 said:

    I think it's lack of

    I think it's lack of understanding. Stage four sounds like a death sentence but plenty of people are living and thriving with that diagnosis. I'm stage four and don't expect to be gone anytme soon. And I'll be 55 next month so your dad does not sound old to me. I'm told I'll never not have cancer, we'll just keep it at bay and I'll live with it like anyone with a chronic disease does. 

    What's the issue with his heart? Is it something treatable? And what chemo is he on?

    I knew so little about cancer before I got it and I've have thought the same, that stage four is the end. I thought everyone lost their hair. I thought you had chemo and it got rid of it or you'd die soon. Now I know a lot more than I ever wanted to.

    Take care and be strong for your dad. He has a fighting chance. 

    Jan

    Thanks for responding. My dad

    Thanks for responding. My dad had 80% blockage in one of his major arteries which the heart doctor unblocked and put in a stent. Dr kept monitoring his heart after the procedure and he kept saying he doesn’t think his heart can withstand the chemo. The decision was left up to my dad if he wanted to go forward with chemo treatments which he did. So far first treatment went ok. He will go back In a week for his second round. The chemo is called FOLFORI 

  • plsletitrain
    plsletitrain Member Posts: 252 Member
    Beatable

    Cancer stage 4 is definitely beatable.  Quite uphill, BUT beatable.  Your dad is not old, and I definitely think he can surpass this as long as he has the right amount of positivity and medicines, which may or may not be chemo, that will enable him to overcome this.  To be honest when I had this I also thought stage 4 is automatic death sentence, but after reading from this forum, I found out that there are so so many stage 4 survivors out there.  Don't google too much.  Just research on the necessary info on the chemo or other ways of beating this, but NEVER let the statistics or whatever scary story they tell you scare the hell out of you.  Instead, show your dad that you're strong.  I myself gain encouragement if I see the people I love strong, it makes me stronger too.  Your dad can do this! We can do this!

  • PamRav
    PamRav Member Posts: 348 Member
    I'm also

    a stage 4.  Diagnosed last year   I'm a very young 61, hah!  Ignore any naysayers and stay positive. Chemo can be tough but I am sure they will monitor your dad closely.  there are lots of us out there living with stage 4  That should give you hope. 

    There's a great deal of info and wonderful people on this board who will help you get through it all. 

    Good luck to your dad and you take good care of yourself. 

    Pam 

     

     

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21

    Beatable

    Cancer stage 4 is definitely beatable.  Quite uphill, BUT beatable.  Your dad is not old, and I definitely think he can surpass this as long as he has the right amount of positivity and medicines, which may or may not be chemo, that will enable him to overcome this.  To be honest when I had this I also thought stage 4 is automatic death sentence, but after reading from this forum, I found out that there are so so many stage 4 survivors out there.  Don't google too much.  Just research on the necessary info on the chemo or other ways of beating this, but NEVER let the statistics or whatever scary story they tell you scare the hell out of you.  Instead, show your dad that you're strong.  I myself gain encouragement if I see the people I love strong, it makes me stronger too.  Your dad can do this! We can do this!

    Thank you so much for

    Thank you so much for responding to my post and sharing your story with me! I truly appreciate everyone’s support on here! I will make sure to keep him in good spirits and staying positive 

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
    edited February 2018 #13
    PamRav said:

    I'm also

    a stage 4.  Diagnosed last year   I'm a very young 61, hah!  Ignore any naysayers and stay positive. Chemo can be tough but I am sure they will monitor your dad closely.  there are lots of us out there living with stage 4  That should give you hope. 

    There's a great deal of info and wonderful people on this board who will help you get through it all. 

    Good luck to your dad and you take good care of yourself. 

    Pam 

     

     

    Thank you so so much for

    Thank you so so much for responding! These stories give me lots of hope and helps Me have a better outlook on this. I truly am inspired by everyone’s stories an journey through this tough battle. My Dad will fight through this and I will be there every step of the way. We won’t give up

  • Slow-runner
    Slow-runner Member Posts: 55 Member
    Same Boat

    My husband was just diagnosed Sept. 2017, he has multiple mets sites.  We too thought it was a death sentence, but through this board I've learned that it's more like a chronic disease.  We are now very positive that he will live many years with this. Shortly after he was diagnosed, a friend died suddenly.  He was doing road work and was hit by a car.  Nicest man, great family.  Made my husband and myself realize that we were now kind of "lucky". We now appeciate everyday, I feel like we were given a reminder that this life is temporary, no matter what your health status, and we had better use the time wisely. You sound like a great daughter, he is lucky to have your support.  Be prepared for the down days, when the chemo makes him tired and achy. Those are the days when my husband's thoughts go to the dark side and he needs a lot of reminding that it will get better. It is an emotional roller coaster but I have this the people on this board so very helpful.   

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21

    Same Boat

    My husband was just diagnosed Sept. 2017, he has multiple mets sites.  We too thought it was a death sentence, but through this board I've learned that it's more like a chronic disease.  We are now very positive that he will live many years with this. Shortly after he was diagnosed, a friend died suddenly.  He was doing road work and was hit by a car.  Nicest man, great family.  Made my husband and myself realize that we were now kind of "lucky". We now appeciate everyday, I feel like we were given a reminder that this life is temporary, no matter what your health status, and we had better use the time wisely. You sound like a great daughter, he is lucky to have your support.  Be prepared for the down days, when the chemo makes him tired and achy. Those are the days when my husband's thoughts go to the dark side and he needs a lot of reminding that it will get better. It is an emotional roller coaster but I have this the people on this board so very helpful.   

    Thank you so much for sharing

    Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. You are absolutely right! We have one life and no matter what, we have to live life to the fullest. And I totally agree, this discussion board is soooo helpful! Im sorry your husband has to go through this battle but it sounds like he’s strong and a fighter. And of course with you by his side every step of the way gives him even more strength 

  • BGNor
    BGNor Member Posts: 32 Member
    MAMAJR said:

    Thank you so much for sharing

    Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. You are absolutely right! We have one life and no matter what, we have to live life to the fullest. And I totally agree, this discussion board is soooo helpful! Im sorry your husband has to go through this battle but it sounds like he’s strong and a fighter. And of course with you by his side every step of the way gives him even more strength 

    I wish you all the best

    Hi

    I wish your dad the best of luck!

    I had 9 treatments of chemo with something similar to FOLFOX 2 years ago. I didn't find it too hard and was able work 50% during the treatment. I was not bothered with nausea as they now have quite good drugs to counter the side effects of the chemo. Chemo treatment usually is quite effective and there are options to treat metastasis to liver and lungs. Chemo is tough on the body, but usually most people will cope well. Don't loose hope - it's possible to get through this.

    Regards, BG

  • BRHMichigan
    BRHMichigan Member Posts: 368
    Hang in there!

    Sorry to hear about your Dad. I am 54, diagnosed last May. And I plan on being around for my family as long as possible! Just encouragecyour Dad to keep fighting. And believe in whatever treatment paths you choose. Lots of options out there. 

    We'll all keep your family in our prayers. It's a powerful thing. And the people on this board are amazing and strong!

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21
    BGNor said:

    I wish you all the best

    Hi

    I wish your dad the best of luck!

    I had 9 treatments of chemo with something similar to FOLFOX 2 years ago. I didn't find it too hard and was able work 50% during the treatment. I was not bothered with nausea as they now have quite good drugs to counter the side effects of the chemo. Chemo treatment usually is quite effective and there are options to treat metastasis to liver and lungs. Chemo is tough on the body, but usually most people will cope well. Don't loose hope - it's possible to get through this.

    Regards, BG

    Thanks for sharing your story

    Thanks for sharing your story!! Yes I will stay Positive and strong for my dad. We will fight this battle together

  • MAMAJR
    MAMAJR Member Posts: 21

    Hang in there!

    Sorry to hear about your Dad. I am 54, diagnosed last May. And I plan on being around for my family as long as possible! Just encouragecyour Dad to keep fighting. And believe in whatever treatment paths you choose. Lots of options out there. 

    We'll all keep your family in our prayers. It's a powerful thing. And the people on this board are amazing and strong!

    Thank you!! Having this

    Thank you!! Having this discussion board has been such a blessing for me especially to be able to hear all these amazing stories of strength and knowing we are not alone going through this. I will keep updating as my dad continues his fight with cancer. Thanks Again!