Anxiety, how do you deal?

Hi, I've been a worrier all my life with everything and everyone and when my wonderful Dad was diagnosed with nhl, I realized one shouldn't worry unless there is something to worry about. Because you get so drained in,life when you're a worrier and you realize all those worries you've had in the past what ifs about your family members and loved ones were nonsense when youre faced with something as serious as cancer. However you know what God gives one strength and hope that makes you go on even with cancer. I have not been diagnosed with cancer but my Dad was... Having ones loved one and self being diagnosed may be different but the worry is there in either case... Try to not worry unless there is a reason to worry and when there is truly something to worry try your best to concentrate on your healing and be strong for that... Worry doesn't take anyone anywhere... My wonderful Dad had a saying...  There was a lady who was so worried every time she was hospitalized for her treatments that she would leave half way she couldn't handle it and she had asked my Dad whom at the time was going through stem cell transplant how is he able to smile and my Dad's response to her was I'm here to not extend my life, I'm here to get my treatment so I can live the length of life God has given me on this earth Healthier. I'm not going to live more or less either way... I have come to realize we live the time given to us and the number of breaths we are to take. We should do our best to not worry so much as there is only so much we can control, what we can do is let go of the worries and deal with things as they come along. Most likely you would have worried yourself for no reason. This worry is hurting your health both mentally and physically. Sometime it comes out of your system as panic attacks when least expected... I'm a person who gets panic attacks and my Dad used to say take deep breaths and it really does help. I imagine my Dad and take deep breaths during an attack and I get out of it. When you findyourself overwhelmed with worries, think of your loved ones and God and take deep breaths. It's not easy at all I know, but worrying doesn't change anything nor help you or anyone else around you. Please take care.... And hopefully your biopsy results will be benign and you will be giving us the clean results...

Ailidh said:

I do sympathize. I wasn't

I do sympathize. I wasn't anxious before my diagnosis, wasn't anxious before my treatment but became sort of globally anxious as my treatment ended. I know how debilitating anxiety can be, and the fact that friends and family cannot understand how we feel just adds to the anxiety. I don't know how these things work where you are but I've managed to access a hypnotherapist (sponsored by the macmillan charity, so I know she's not a quack), who has given me some relaxation techniques - no spinning watches or making me cluck like a chicken, I promise!

Here are 2 things I've found helpful, one hers, one mine.

Hers: After sitting still, breathing gently but deeply, then imagine a large bubble, as translucent as a child's soap-bubble but very strong. Imagine the bubble landing on your head, slowly travelling down inside you until it gets to where you feel the anxiety. Let the bubble wrap itself completely round the anxiety, and then imagine it rising gently back up through your body and out. Look at the anxiety inside the bubble. What colour is it? What shape is it? It's trapped inside the bubble, which is now floating away from you. It can either float away out of sight or what I do is have it burst on the trees at the end of my street, where the anxiety is in so many so tiny pieces that it can't hurt anyone.

Yes, I know it sounds weird but I find it helpful.

 

Mine: Before I go to bed at night, I write down anything that I'm anxious about. Somehow seeing it down on paper gets it out of me, and makes it something I can then either close the book on and leave downstairs while I go up to bed, or in the writing of it I sometimes come to an answer.

Yes, I know it sounds simplistic but I find it helpful.

 

Perhaps the key to either of these things working is that when we do them or similar things, we're DOING something - everything around cancer seems to take our power away, taking a little bit of it back gives us a sense of control, which does alleviate the anxiety, if only for a short time. The more we can then thread together little bits of anxiety-free time, the better we will feel.

 

Good luck for Wednesday.

My mad theory is that we are all alloted one problem a day. I convey this to my brother who is in remission from MCL and my mom who is reaching 91 and is struggling to retain her independence. One problem is the limit and that means whatever has to be done today. If there is an appointment with the doc tomorrow, that's tomorrow's problem. My brother brings up that his cancer will return and I say to him.. will it return today? Probably not. However, you need to figure out what to make yourself for dinner and that is the problem of the day. Too much and we drown in all the maybes and possibilities. So, for what it's worth.. my mad theory.

dkatz said:

One problem a day

My mad theory is that we are all alloted one problem a day. I convey this to my brother who is in remission from MCL and my mom who is reaching 91 and is struggling to retain her independence. One problem is the limit and that means whatever has to be done today. If there is an appointment with the doc tomorrow, that's tomorrow's problem. My brother brings up that his cancer will return and I say to him.. will it return today? Probably not. However, you need to figure out what to make yourself for dinner and that is the problem of the day. Too much and we drown in all the maybes and possibilities. So, for what it's worth.. my mad theory.

Is there enough toilet paper in the house?  Check - we're good .

Thanks for the idea!