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Devastated by my scan

hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Prayers please as I am still trying to pull together my thoughts. Cancer has returned wrapped around my carotid artery and jugular vein.  Surgery is not an option as too tight an area with too many critical parts. Dr said it a rare place to metastize. I will have a PET Tuesday to determine if in bones or liver. Lungs are clear. If localized, looking at more radiation and chemo. My mind is racing uncertain if I am up for the fight. I was not prepared for this and hate putting my family through it again.


janetluvsron's picture
Posts: 116
Joined: May 2013

my prayers are with you, may strength and love get you thru this,


CherieLW's picture
Posts: 472
Joined: May 2013


Continuing to pray for you and hope that this hasn't spread any further... Hate that you may have to go through this again too as well as your family.  Stay positive. You have been such a big positive influence to on everyone here...I know it's tough to take this kind of news in, but I'm always here if you need to chat.  Praying that the PET goes okay and no further bad news...


Posts: 1914
Joined: May 2012

Damn this cancer.....know my thoughts and prayers are with you.  I can and do know the thoughts that are flying at you fast and furious.  Don't be afraid that you're putting your wonderful family through it again....please lean on them and us here.  This isn't going to be an easy journey, but as many have told me do-able.  Keep the faith Candi, and fight the beast.  A giant cyber hug coming your way....and tons of positves !  Walking beside you, if only in thought !  Katie

Posts: 839
Joined: May 2013

that this is happening to you!  I will continue to pray for you and wish you only the best.  You have my full support whatever you decide, but I pray you will fight.  I almost gave up and you helped me to continue in the last few days of my treatment.  I'll never forget that and always be grateful.  You reached out to me when I was at the end of my rope.  You tied a knot and helped me hang on.  I thank you from the bottom of my heart.   Your family loves you and would never consider they were being "put through" anything.  Sending you lots of ((HUGS)) and praying for the best for you. 

fishmanpa's picture
Posts: 1225
Joined: Jan 2013

That and a few other choice syllables! 

My prayers are with you!



hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Your words really do help. I hated to post because you all deserve to keep all the optimism we have shared. I finally got out of bed and packed our bags to head to the lake for the weekend as we had planned. It was a real push. Think I'll leave the computer at home. I haven't read up on this and don't intend to. Doctor said if it is in bone/liver it is still treatable "to some degree". Will know more Tuesday.

God bless each and every one of you. And, thank you TracyLynn for letting me know I made a difference. 

Posts: 839
Joined: May 2013

You definitely made (and will continue to MAKE) a difference in a lot of peoples' lives.  You're an inspiration!  Lots of prayers between now and Tuesday.  Keep us posted and know we're with you!

rachel12yrsuv's picture
Posts: 435
Joined: Feb 2013

However you can Candinhang in there!  This just plain sucks! Your family will pull together for you, you are not doi g this this to them and they know that, i will pray for you that it is localized there and this new treatment kills the beast for the final time and may it never enter your body again!



VanessaSLO's picture
Posts: 283
Joined: Jul 2012

Oh, dear Candi, I'm so shocked by this news... But please, get your spirits up and fight this beast as hard as you can! You know that here are many people whose cancer returned and they managed to beat it again! I know you can do it!!!

You were one of people here who helped me in a great way when my Dad went thru his treatment last year! I will never forget your warm and kind words and how thoughtful and caring you were! Thank you for that!!! I pray for you and I know that with all that positive energyy we will will give you, you will WIN this again!!!


hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Thank you and continued blessings to your family.

Skiffin16's picture
Posts: 8298
Joined: Sep 2009

Not sure what you have had for Chemo...

But I know that I had Cisplatin, Taxotere and 5FU and the tumor (secondary) that I had in a similar location completely dissolved away....

Prayers for an answer for you...


hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

You always seem to know the right thing to say. I feel better already. I only had Cisplatin. Still waiting to hear from radiologist if this area had been treated already. I know he did both sides but surgeon thinks unlikely this particular spot got radiated. Needless to say, I am very scared. Only 62 years old with lots left to do. Glad I got to spend a week in Nassau with all of my sisters 2 weeks ago. Canceling trip planned with my husband the 1st of Sept. but will keep hope for someday. God has a different plan for me right now. 

VanessaSLO's picture
Posts: 283
Joined: Jul 2012

Oh and yes, I almost forgot what I really wanted to say! Remember how you lift many of us with these lyrics? One of your first posts to me was your incouragement with these words in this inspiring song by Mary Stevenson:

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord, "You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there have been only one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,"The times when you have seen only one set of footprints, is when I carried you."
Mary Stevenson

hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Made me cry....thank you for remembering and reminding me ...hugs

debbiejeanne's picture
Posts: 3095
Joined: Jan 2010

candi, damn, damn, damn!  words can't express how sorry i am about ur news.  it is going to b a tough road but u r up 4 the fight!  ur family will b there for u and so will we.  we will all b keeping u n our thots and prayers!  tuesday w/b here b4 u know it.  praying for best scan results possible.


longtermsurvivor's picture
Posts: 1845
Joined: Mar 2010

One step after another Candi.  You can do it.  And you know not to cross any bridge until you are there.  I'm sorry to hear of the problems, hits close to home for me as your treatment and mine were almost simultaneous.  Best to you.



catfish_58's picture
Posts: 134
Joined: Feb 2013

Had almost the same thing you are having,Had an aggresive one that had wrapped itself around a blood vessel on the left side of my neck below my ear lobe and the mass was just over my carotid artery,Couldn't operate had to do 33 rads and 7 chemos of Cisplatin and Cancer  came from my left tonsil,Dr. said it was an agressive one, Had my results of my pet scan scan on wedn. and am now NED.I know you'll do fine and kick this things butt.Will put you on the prayer list and keep us informed.

phrannie51's picture
Posts: 4704
Joined: Mar 2012

Candi....I'm so SO sorry to hear this....I can well imagine that your thoughts are all over the place.  You go to the lake, relax a little....sleep on this.  I think you do have the fight in you.....you will discover a reserve you didn't know existed within you....Do NOT worry about "putting your family through it again".....they love you, care about you, and want you around for a long time....they too have a reserve you didn't know existed.


Hondo's picture
Posts: 6643
Joined: Apr 2009


Sure thing will also ask my Church to keep you in prayer


God Bless

Tim Hondo

donfoo's picture
Posts: 1729
Joined: Dec 2012


So sorry to hear about the new/recurring cancer. There are many who have fought the beast multiple times and here to share their tales. You know a lot more than the first time and eyes wide open this go around. Use this to your advantage to get the best treatment as quickly as you can. Prayers and thoughts are with you, don

CivilMatt's picture
Posts: 4543
Joined: May 2012


I started this cancer adventure with a Jugular Vein dissection.  It was a toss-up whether the doctor would (or could) remove it without rads first, but after he saw it, it came out.

I am hoping your scan is good and that you get some dynamite treatment options.  I have always appreciated your optimism in the H&N threads  and you are more than welcome to use some of mine right now.

Only good thoughts for you.


Posts: 28
Joined: Feb 2013

You've definitely got my prayers.  I'm so sorry you got this news.  


Posts: 269
Joined: Jun 2012

So sorry to hear this news. Will be praying that it has not spread any further. I can't imagine what all is going thru your mind. I can't say what I would do if I was in your shoes so I will just pray for you and be here to cheer you on no matter what you choose.

Duggie88's picture
Posts: 707
Joined: Feb 2010

I am always saddened by the bad news that comes by way of CSN. I find myself heartbroken by news from people I've never met but  journeyed with them down a painfull road we would wouldn't wish on our worst enemy. The best thing about family is they will help with the bumps in the road as will all your fellow worriors in our little room here. I will have a special request for my brother in law (Father Joe) this weekend. I will spare him the priest jokes and request a prayer be sent your way.

My thoughts and prayers are with you................fight on.


Grandmax4's picture
Posts: 717
Joined: Dec 2011

going to bed when I read your post, was going to wait and post tomorrow, even started to walk away, but, something drew me back~~drew me back to say, I'm so sorry to hear this news, I sometimes question why God puts burdens and sorrow on good people, why? But, i know in my heart, God has a plan for your life and the victory over this beast will be yours. Praying for you and your family

luv2cut1's picture
Posts: 288
Joined: Oct 2010

So sorry for your news.  My hubby had recurrence in 2009, one year after first chemo (cisplatin/erbitux) and radiation. Although he did have surgery, he had positive margins. Had chemo again (carboplatin/taxotere) and radiation again. Like you, the area of recurrence had not been fully radiated the first time. Four years later, he is doing well. He is due for another checkup this month. Hang in there. I hope there will be many options available.  Please try to enjoy your trip to the lake, and know that many prayers are with you. 


jim and i's picture
jim and i
Posts: 1788
Joined: May 2011

Candi, my prayers are going out for you. I pray they are able to treat this new site and that you find peace.


Laralyn's picture
Posts: 531
Joined: Apr 2012

I'm sorry too for the delayed response. Let us know as you find out more. I completely understand the dread of going through it again... but I know you can do it. I'll be thinking of you and praying for you!

nick770's picture
Posts: 195
Joined: May 2012

Hey, I have a friend who had a similar situation, he two more types of chemo and is not only responding well (he night as well be drinking sugar water) to the chemo but the tumors are too! 

you have my prayers 

jim and i's picture
jim and i
Posts: 1788
Joined: May 2011


praying this is contained in that spot. i am sure your family will go through anything for you. know you are in my prayers candi. believe in miracles, they still happen.


pogsfog's picture
Posts: 10
Joined: Sep 2013



My prayers are with you. 

Think Positive ... Stay Strong !  

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