Hi! I'm New here :)

2

Comments

  • lintx
    lintx Member Posts: 697
    Hi Cyndi
    I'm new, as well. Even though my Onco says we are all as different as our fingerprints, I see much commonalility in these posts. I posted the one "Afraid to take Tamoxifen" and had awesome responses from these great women. Since I'm 63, I figured I'd also be given one of the AI drugs, but Tamox is the choice because my bc was such a high estrogen receptor. I finally ordered it and will give it a try this week. I'm still afraid! I had a bilateral with immediate DIEP flap reconstruction in May this yr. Mine was caught early at my annual mammo. It was stage 1 and 1.2 centimeters, nested in a duct w/no breast or node invasion, also clean margins. No chemo/rads either. Healing from that surgery was tough since I had the huge stomach surgery, as well. The tubes were a pain! I had 4 and a stomach medicine ball. I just had my revision surgery last week, where the stomach scar is smoothed, breasts are sized more correctly and nipples created. My DR didn't save my nipples because my cancer was an aggressive/invasive one. Skin was spared, and everything looks better than before I had a bilateral. I'm very small, too, and had to gain weight to even have enough fat to lipo for new breasts. I didn't want implants. Just a personal decision. Even though there was no invasion, the Onco DR says the word is in the report for a reason, and Tamox may or may not keep things at bay. Like you, I was happy to get the original path report and still am. I just hadn't paid attention to "that" one word in my report...invasive. You've probably had the bc emails w/pics of the octopus w/tentacles shaped masses. That was mine. I knew it was aggressive, as the radiologist removed a section. When I saw the spaghetti looking legs, I just knew. I can't remember driving home that day. All of it is frightening and on my mind nonstop, but these women have given me such hope. Who better to discuss it with than another female? Hugs to you, Linda
  • MsGebby
    MsGebby Member Posts: 659
    Just dropping
    in to say Hi and to lend an ear.

    Welcome Sister ... sorry you found us but glad you found us too. :)

    Thank you for sharing your story. It's the ones with happy endings that we all need to read.

    Hugs,
    Mary
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53
    lintx said:

    Hi Cyndi
    I'm new, as well. Even though my Onco says we are all as different as our fingerprints, I see much commonalility in these posts. I posted the one "Afraid to take Tamoxifen" and had awesome responses from these great women. Since I'm 63, I figured I'd also be given one of the AI drugs, but Tamox is the choice because my bc was such a high estrogen receptor. I finally ordered it and will give it a try this week. I'm still afraid! I had a bilateral with immediate DIEP flap reconstruction in May this yr. Mine was caught early at my annual mammo. It was stage 1 and 1.2 centimeters, nested in a duct w/no breast or node invasion, also clean margins. No chemo/rads either. Healing from that surgery was tough since I had the huge stomach surgery, as well. The tubes were a pain! I had 4 and a stomach medicine ball. I just had my revision surgery last week, where the stomach scar is smoothed, breasts are sized more correctly and nipples created. My DR didn't save my nipples because my cancer was an aggressive/invasive one. Skin was spared, and everything looks better than before I had a bilateral. I'm very small, too, and had to gain weight to even have enough fat to lipo for new breasts. I didn't want implants. Just a personal decision. Even though there was no invasion, the Onco DR says the word is in the report for a reason, and Tamox may or may not keep things at bay. Like you, I was happy to get the original path report and still am. I just hadn't paid attention to "that" one word in my report...invasive. You've probably had the bc emails w/pics of the octopus w/tentacles shaped masses. That was mine. I knew it was aggressive, as the radiologist removed a section. When I saw the spaghetti looking legs, I just knew. I can't remember driving home that day. All of it is frightening and on my mind nonstop, but these women have given me such hope. Who better to discuss it with than another female? Hugs to you, Linda

    Thank you, Linda, for your
    Thank you, Linda, for your response. The word "invasive"took my breath away when I thought I was prepared for the results of my first path report after the needle biopsy. It really scared me. But after the following biopsies and mastectomies with final path reports out I am no longer worried. Apparently mine wasn't very aggressive or at any rate we must have caught it early enough that the double mastectomy got rid of all traces of the cancer. Thank God. I'm looking forward right now to getting the last two tubes out. And then we'll go on from there with the reconstruction.
    *Hugs back at 'cha*
    -Cyndi
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53
    MsGebby said:

    Just dropping
    in to say Hi and to lend an ear.

    Welcome Sister ... sorry you found us but glad you found us too. :)

    Thank you for sharing your story. It's the ones with happy endings that we all need to read.

    Hugs,
    Mary

    Thank you, Mary!
    I can use

    Thank you, Mary!
    I can use all the info & support anyone has to offer. I appreciate your kind welcome.
    *Hugs*
    -Cyndi
  • hope4thebest
    hope4thebest Member Posts: 108
    CyndiJW said:

    Thank you for your feedback,
    Thank you for your feedback, Annie!

    Did you also have the skin/nipple saving procedure? Other than more firm & perky (and who doesn't want THAT?) do you think your breasts look like normal breasts? The reason I am wondering about this is because a lady that works at at Pretty in Pink said something about after reconstruction the breasts are more-now I can't remember her Terminology but seemed to mean-wider or broader, leading me to believe perhaps no cleavage? The before & after pics my PS showed me of women he'd performed this same procedure on looked perfectly normal, only better. As you said: firmer & perkier. I also wondered, since I had tubes in & the lady did not see me after surgery & I didn't mention to her what type reconstruction I had chosen, that maybe she was referring to survivors that had had a more extensive mastectomy.

    I think right now these are my most burning questions although I certainly have more!

    Thanks again to you & everyone else for your support & information. Good luck to you, Annie! Sounds like you are really doing well!

    -Cyndi

    Everyone is different,
    Hi Cyndi,

    It is hard for me to say much because we are all so different. My PS seemed to concentrate on achieving a good cleavage. I think that is a big challenge for them-- keeping things even. In my case, I did not save the nipples and have not gotten them tattoed on yet. It takes time for these to settle!! (6-12 mos-- take your time, don't rush!) Yes, I would agree that this new set seems to be wider set than my natural ones. (Kind of like 4 wheel drive, they seem to set alittle lower and wider). I am very happy with mine when I wear a bra. Rest assured that no-one will ever notice, they do a great job.

    For me, I live in Hawaii and spend time in a bikini. I am not so pleased because they removed all the breast tissue, I am thin and feel self conscious about the lack of 'meat' (for lack of a better term), on my upper chest. So, in answering your questions, yes, they look real but close up, there are some irregularities. I have yet to finish and am hoping to be more satisfied after another procedure or two.

    Yes, I am happy with my decision regardless of appearance. This has been a true awakening
    of my soul!

    Thank you for your kind words. I am doing ok, we all have ups and downs, so pace yourself.

    Take care,
    Annie
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    welcome...Cyndi
    I had

    welcome...Cyndi

    I had lumectomy and raditaion (starting 5th yr tamoxifen)

    I too feel I HAD IT easy compared to many-I said that once and I was corrected quickly..

    nothing is easy about Cancer!

    Durting my daily radiation I met many women with so many more concerns then I had medically-we always had nice chats & understood each other...no many what stage, where in treatment etc..

    not sure if THIS is worded correctly...




    Denise
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53

    welcome...Cyndi
    I had

    welcome...Cyndi

    I had lumectomy and raditaion (starting 5th yr tamoxifen)

    I too feel I HAD IT easy compared to many-I said that once and I was corrected quickly..

    nothing is easy about Cancer!

    Durting my daily radiation I met many women with so many more concerns then I had medically-we always had nice chats & understood each other...no many what stage, where in treatment etc..

    not sure if THIS is worded correctly...




    Denise

    Thank you, Denise. When I
    Thank you, Denise. When I think back to those days between knowing something was wrong but without a diagnosis to confirm it, and without any options given to choose from, yes, that was NOT easy! I went through hell for a few days. My mind would travel to that dark & morbid place where we never want to be. Once I was given a diagnosis and options for handling it I was in such a better place.

    It sounds like you had the same tx as my sister. She hits her fifth year this month had a lumpectomy & is also on Tamoxifin. She's doing great! If it weren't for additional family members being diagnosed (or at least us finding out about them) since my sister's diagnosis five years ago I would probably have gone that same route.

    I'm glad you are doing so well. Thanks for replying to my post. I'm missing human interaction as I am just at home with my supportive husband and spoiled little furry companion. I'm missing people! LOL!

    -Cyndi
  • ESDC
    ESDC Member Posts: 43
    Hi
    Hi Cyndi, Like you I'm very new here but I can promise you that you're in the right place for support, info' and a shoulder to cry on. I had a LH mastectomy with immediate expander strattice reconstruction on 8/8/12 and I'm about to start chemo next week. I'm then looking at radio and Tamoxifen so wont be able to finish the reconstruction for a while. I know it seems like a long arduous process at the moment but you'll be amazed how quickly you start to feel better, especially when you get those tubes out.

    Best of luck

    Eliza xxxx
  • lintx
    lintx Member Posts: 697

    Everyone is different,
    Hi Cyndi,

    It is hard for me to say much because we are all so different. My PS seemed to concentrate on achieving a good cleavage. I think that is a big challenge for them-- keeping things even. In my case, I did not save the nipples and have not gotten them tattoed on yet. It takes time for these to settle!! (6-12 mos-- take your time, don't rush!) Yes, I would agree that this new set seems to be wider set than my natural ones. (Kind of like 4 wheel drive, they seem to set alittle lower and wider). I am very happy with mine when I wear a bra. Rest assured that no-one will ever notice, they do a great job.

    For me, I live in Hawaii and spend time in a bikini. I am not so pleased because they removed all the breast tissue, I am thin and feel self conscious about the lack of 'meat' (for lack of a better term), on my upper chest. So, in answering your questions, yes, they look real but close up, there are some irregularities. I have yet to finish and am hoping to be more satisfied after another procedure or two.

    Yes, I am happy with my decision regardless of appearance. This has been a true awakening
    of my soul!

    Thank you for your kind words. I am doing ok, we all have ups and downs, so pace yourself.

    Take care,
    Annie

    Hi Annie
    OMG...you live in vacation paradise! We gals are very jealous:) Your advice about not being in a rush is perfect. It does take time for things to settle. If only my nerves would! I've had so many DR's appts since the bad mammo in Apr that I get all weak in the knees now when I enter their ofc. Have a great day. Linda
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53
    ESDC said:

    Hi
    Hi Cyndi, Like you I'm very new here but I can promise you that you're in the right place for support, info' and a shoulder to cry on. I had a LH mastectomy with immediate expander strattice reconstruction on 8/8/12 and I'm about to start chemo next week. I'm then looking at radio and Tamoxifen so wont be able to finish the reconstruction for a while. I know it seems like a long arduous process at the moment but you'll be amazed how quickly you start to feel better, especially when you get those tubes out.

    Best of luck

    Eliza xxxx

    Thank you, Eliza!
    Today is

    Thank you, Eliza!

    Today is my second delay in getting my last two tubes out. It has only been three wks (tomorrow) since my mastectomy but I was supposed to get my last two tubes out on Thurs, they weren't ready so the Dr asked me to chk back today. To avoid another long drive & wait to see the Dr I called his office this a.m. & gave the readings over the phone. It was another No-Go. :(. Still collecting too much fluid to remove. I'm to chk back again on this Thurs to maybe get them out on Friday. Yes, it seems forever but I know by the alendar it hasn't been THAT long. Just seems like it.

    Good luck eith your chemo & rads. My sister had the rads & also the Tamoxifin and had no ill effects with either(5 yrs ago). I know the chemo is scarier bur I'm sure you'll be fine. Keep us up to date. Your surgery was very close to the time I had mine (8/21/12).

    *Hugs*
    Cyndi
  • Faith1122
    Faith1122 Member Posts: 46
    CyndiJW said:

    Hi Faith!
    Sounds like you

    Hi Faith!
    Sounds like you are on the home stretch. Good for you! How long ago was your mastectomy? All of this seems to go on forever but it has only been 2 1/2 wks since mine. I was very small & wore Victoria Secret bras to push up, fill in and even had gel pads built into the bra, so while I looked fine in bras I didnt look great without. I asked my PS what cup size I was (hard to tell when you use VS bras as some seem to be labeled based on size with padded bras) and he told me a B cup. I asked him if we could go to a full C and he thought that would be doable, but of course we won't know until we are into the filling SE stage. As far as the shape of your "new" breasts, do they look anywhere close to what you looked like before? Obviously I am not so keen on matching my before as I am hoping they are a little larger but look like normal, natural breasts. I am married, have been for 15 years and he is very supportive of me, and will love me no matter what. It's just that I am trying very hard to get my expectations in line with the reality before we get to the end of this long process.
    Thank you so much for your response!

    -Cyndi

    Just about done
    My mastectomy was 2/21/2013. I get my stitches out on Thursday & then nipple tatooing in December. I think my new rack is a little smaller but a different shape. If I was just standing straight covering the scar they look like perfect breasts.If I lay on my back it's weird because there is like 3 inches of complete flatness & then my breasts stand straight up. When I lean over there is a little rippling. There was more rippling before but Friday besides getting nipples they also took some fat from my thighs & injected it into my breasts. They look really nice in clothes. I was lucky enough to have some of the best surgeons in New Jersey. Do you have expanders in now?
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53
    Faith1122 said:

    Just about done
    My mastectomy was 2/21/2013. I get my stitches out on Thursday & then nipple tatooing in December. I think my new rack is a little smaller but a different shape. If I was just standing straight covering the scar they look like perfect breasts.If I lay on my back it's weird because there is like 3 inches of complete flatness & then my breasts stand straight up. When I lean over there is a little rippling. There was more rippling before but Friday besides getting nipples they also took some fat from my thighs & injected it into my breasts. They look really nice in clothes. I was lucky enough to have some of the best surgeons in New Jersey. Do you have expanders in now?

    Yes, I have the expanders in
    Yes, I have the expanders in now but they haven't begun filling them yet because I still have two tubes left. I can't seem to get those last two tubes (I started out with four, the first two being removed right on "schedule", about a week after surgery) down to below 20 cc in a 24 hr period. Every day they routinely put out 10 cc of fluid each, twice per day (that's how often we drain & measure output). I will not be a candidate for any liposuction for filling spaces due to my low body weight. Looks to ME that I have some fat tissue in my abdomen that could be used but since I only weight 97 lbs the PS has already told me they probably would never consider this procedure. I know other ppl that have also had this done, and they, like you, really saw an improvement in both areas, I might add, so I hate that I am not a candidate should I need it later on.

    I guess I will just have to wait and see how things progress with me before I know what I will look like. But, from what you have said, I can probably expect to look to the outside world "normal" but to myself different than before, at best. Please keep me updated as to your procedures & progress.

    Thank you again for your response. Have a great day!

    *Hugs*
    Cyndi
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53

    Everyone is different,
    Hi Cyndi,

    It is hard for me to say much because we are all so different. My PS seemed to concentrate on achieving a good cleavage. I think that is a big challenge for them-- keeping things even. In my case, I did not save the nipples and have not gotten them tattoed on yet. It takes time for these to settle!! (6-12 mos-- take your time, don't rush!) Yes, I would agree that this new set seems to be wider set than my natural ones. (Kind of like 4 wheel drive, they seem to set alittle lower and wider). I am very happy with mine when I wear a bra. Rest assured that no-one will ever notice, they do a great job.

    For me, I live in Hawaii and spend time in a bikini. I am not so pleased because they removed all the breast tissue, I am thin and feel self conscious about the lack of 'meat' (for lack of a better term), on my upper chest. So, in answering your questions, yes, they look real but close up, there are some irregularities. I have yet to finish and am hoping to be more satisfied after another procedure or two.

    Yes, I am happy with my decision regardless of appearance. This has been a true awakening
    of my soul!

    Thank you for your kind words. I am doing ok, we all have ups and downs, so pace yourself.

    Take care,
    Annie

    Annie, thank you for
    Annie, thank you for responding to my questions about the appearance of "new breasts". I think this will help me to get my expectations more in line with reality. And also it helps me to know that what you see is not necessarily what you get since the PS can go back & make adjustment throughout this long process. I never realized that before. I thought once they finished filling the expanders and replaced them with the implants that was that. Good to know that is not always the case if adjustments need to be made. Since it is so early in my treatment I should have plenty of time to have these discussions with my PS. I am also very thin and my PS has already stated that liposuction to fill in my chest is probably not an option for me. So I will just have to wait and see how it gets.

    Thank you again for addressing my specific concerns!

    Have a great day!

    -Cyndi
  • csuzanne
    csuzanne Member Posts: 17
    Hi Cyndi!
    Don't feel ashamed of joining this group, we have all been through this horrible disease to one extent or another.
    I am blessed like you. I didn't have to have chemo or radiation. I had a rt mastectomy 6/11 to get rid of the cancer, and a lft mastectomy (no cancer)with a diep reconstruction 12/11. I've had one fat grafting and am having another this month, and the nipple replacement in December.
    I felt guilty when telling friends that I had cancer but didn't have to go through the other hell, when they did. Two women I work with have been down that road, and they told me to be grateful and embrace it! So should you!
    Good luck in your journey, and know that you have so much support...just ask.
    Suzanne
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53
    csuzanne said:

    Hi Cyndi!
    Don't feel ashamed of joining this group, we have all been through this horrible disease to one extent or another.
    I am blessed like you. I didn't have to have chemo or radiation. I had a rt mastectomy 6/11 to get rid of the cancer, and a lft mastectomy (no cancer)with a diep reconstruction 12/11. I've had one fat grafting and am having another this month, and the nipple replacement in December.
    I felt guilty when telling friends that I had cancer but didn't have to go through the other hell, when they did. Two women I work with have been down that road, and they told me to be grateful and embrace it! So should you!
    Good luck in your journey, and know that you have so much support...just ask.
    Suzanne

    Thank you, Suzanne,
    I

    Thank you, Suzanne,

    I appreciate your kind words. Congratulations to you for also being lucky enough to have avoided the chemo & rads,too. None of this is easy but I know we are very fortunate compared to many others.

    This discussion forum has really educated me a lot in the few days since I joined. I don't think I even knew what questions to ask my doctor until I started reading posts on this forum.

    *Hugs*
    Cyndi
  • RozHopkins
    RozHopkins Member Posts: 578 Member
    CyndiJW said:

    Yes, I have the expanders in
    Yes, I have the expanders in now but they haven't begun filling them yet because I still have two tubes left. I can't seem to get those last two tubes (I started out with four, the first two being removed right on "schedule", about a week after surgery) down to below 20 cc in a 24 hr period. Every day they routinely put out 10 cc of fluid each, twice per day (that's how often we drain & measure output). I will not be a candidate for any liposuction for filling spaces due to my low body weight. Looks to ME that I have some fat tissue in my abdomen that could be used but since I only weight 97 lbs the PS has already told me they probably would never consider this procedure. I know other ppl that have also had this done, and they, like you, really saw an improvement in both areas, I might add, so I hate that I am not a candidate should I need it later on.

    I guess I will just have to wait and see how things progress with me before I know what I will look like. But, from what you have said, I can probably expect to look to the outside world "normal" but to myself different than before, at best. Please keep me updated as to your procedures & progress.

    Thank you again for your response. Have a great day!

    *Hugs*
    Cyndi

    Bilateral
    I have implants and look totally fine clothed. I have spare flesh to the sides which no one can see. I was large breasted and was reduced from 38 DDD to 36 however normal bras don't fit my shape and because of hot flashes bras make me very hot. So I don't wear one even at the gym. But if I have to I bought the new type that slip on and are very light weight and fit wherever they touch a lot like a sports bra. I do have cleavage won't be doing tattoos as the scaring is kind of dominant, if they fade then perhaps but it's been two years now and still obvious.
  • Attygirl
    Attygirl Member Posts: 121
    Hi there
    ...and welcome.

    I was diagnosed in April with Stage 1. Lumpectomy in May. Radiation (with bad burns) over the summer. Starting Tamoxifen next week.

    My story has been a good one, relatively speaking, so I felt like I shouldn't complain or had no right to. But the truth is, my journey has it's struggles and I have learned to allow myself to feel whatever it is I need to feel.

    So glad you have found this wonderful space!
    Thoughts and prayers...
  • laughs_a_lot
    laughs_a_lot Member Posts: 1,368 Member
    Welcome
    Sorry that you had to join us but so glad you found us. Lumpectomy here. I did nothing for a while about getting a prostetic. I only got one in case I went for a professional job. I am glad I was not rushed on this issue. Some of us just need time. Hope all goes well for you.
  • CyndiJW
    CyndiJW Member Posts: 53

    Welcome
    Sorry that you had to join us but so glad you found us. Lumpectomy here. I did nothing for a while about getting a prostetic. I only got one in case I went for a professional job. I am glad I was not rushed on this issue. Some of us just need time. Hope all goes well for you.

    Thanks Attygirl & laughs a
    Thanks Attygirl & laughs a lot for responding to my post. My sister had a lumpectomy with the five-day on-site radiation five years ago. She flew through it with flying colors. We were so relieved & happy for her!

    However, here we are five years later with (counting my sister) four more occurrences of BC in our direct lineage on our maternal side, so I chose a different course. Much more to deal with than what she had, but for my peace of mind it was worth it to me.

    I hope both of you continue to do so well, and lets just count our blessings & be grateful that we have had so much less to go through than so very many others here. It is quite humbling & also makes it hard to get on this board to complain about ANYTHING! But, of course, we all have our own issues.

    Thank ou both again. Glad you are doing so well!

    *Hugs*
    Cyndi
  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
    CyndiJW said:

    Lynn,Just out of curiosity,
    Lynn,
    Just out of curiosity, why would you choose tram or diep flap over expanders & implants? My PS told me up front, the first time I met with him, that I would be reading about these procedures (which I had not up to that point) but that he was not going to be doing those. Now, whether it was due to my body type (extremely petite, 97 lbs, 5'2", and maybe a B cup barely prior to surgery) or for some other reason I don't know. My mass was very small & on the very left side of my left breast, stage I. Anyway, since I was not going to require radiation or chemo my thought was to just do the least disfiguring & try to get the best "bang out of my buck", or as I called it then, making lemonade out of the lemons I'd been given. I wanted to be a bit larger than before. I'm not even sure if that is possible but he thinks I can be a C cup when this is all over. Of course, only time will tell whether my skin will cooperate to safely & comfortably accommodate a C size implant.
    I look forward to hearing from you and others about these various procedures. I'm already learning a lot just from reading other posts on here.
    Thank you!

    -Cyndi

    Hi Cyndi and welcome to the
    Hi Cyndi and welcome to the club no one wants to join! You are surrounded though by caring and supportive pink sisters! I wish you all the best and keep posting!


    Hugs, Noel