My mom has cancer... I need some advice!

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Comments

  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member

    Losing
    My mom has had cancer since I was eleven. I am now 25. The battle has been long and rough. To see my mom, the only women I think that has ever loved me unconditionally is heartbreaking. Her cancer started in the breast,to colon, to liver, and just about everywhere in her abdomen now. Multiple surgeries, multiple rounds of chemo and radiation. Side effects and the slow loss of abilities. I love her so much. She is in a hospice now, cant eat, can't take her meds, can't really wake up. I hope that she can look in the eye tomorrow morning one last time so I can tell her how awesome she has been to me before she passes. I've already realized our last times together doing "normal" things are over. Its so difficult to deal with the fact that I may never hear her talk to me or acknowledge me ever again. I'm scared for my father. I don't want to abandon him but I know I can't be around my childhood home and see all the places she used to sit. I've come to accept there is nothing I could have done to stop this from happening, but now that her death is right before me I wish I had all the time back. I hope she is not suffering. I don't want my mom to go away. I miss talking to her. I wish she could break though the pain meds and the toxins building up from her liver and just see me with a clear head for just a moment so she can tell me what she wants and I can tell her I love her and to not be afraid to go if she needs to I don't want her to suffer anymore

    Talk
    Double Post
  • matrixer99
    matrixer99 Member Posts: 1
    I have the same situation
    Hi, my name is Jose and when my mother was first diagnosed with colon cancer, I had 17 years old. Since then, everything in my life changed. My mother is a very strong person of character and did everything possible to ensure that their children were well. However, I have a big, united family. Also, my school assessments were of honor. But since the situation of my mother, I pretty depressed and started to leave school homework's to help her. Today, with 18 years of age, I'm still going through a difficult time. Anyway, I would like to know more about your daily life with this situation. Take care ;)
  • Thartt
    Thartt Member Posts: 1
    I am 23 and my mom was
    I am 23 and my mom was diagnosed with stage 3c aggressive ovarian cancer, watching my mother the most kind loving strong and generous person I know go through chemo was difficult to say the least. It didnt help that I had basically no support system through the whole thing, a group of friends who were fun to go out with in the weekends but not the kind of people you turn to for emotional support. It's difficult to watch anyone especially your own mother deal with cancer and chemo and even after chemo constantly worrying if the cancer will come back. My mother has been in remission for 9 monts I just found out today that her ca125 is elevated along with an enlarged lymph node near her liver, two bad signs. It's difficult but no matter what I put on an act in front of my mom I always stay positive around her and wait til I'm alone to break down or get upset, it's hard but it's the least I can do. I pushed myself to study and pass my nursing exam despite how hard it is to concentrate because I know how happy it made her to see me pass. Overall all I can do is spend a lot of time with my mom stay positive and help her avoid stress
  • Noellesmom
    Noellesmom Member Posts: 1,859 Member
    Thartt said:

    I am 23 and my mom was
    I am 23 and my mom was diagnosed with stage 3c aggressive ovarian cancer, watching my mother the most kind loving strong and generous person I know go through chemo was difficult to say the least. It didnt help that I had basically no support system through the whole thing, a group of friends who were fun to go out with in the weekends but not the kind of people you turn to for emotional support. It's difficult to watch anyone especially your own mother deal with cancer and chemo and even after chemo constantly worrying if the cancer will come back. My mother has been in remission for 9 monts I just found out today that her ca125 is elevated along with an enlarged lymph node near her liver, two bad signs. It's difficult but no matter what I put on an act in front of my mom I always stay positive around her and wait til I'm alone to break down or get upset, it's hard but it's the least I can do. I pushed myself to study and pass my nursing exam despite how hard it is to concentrate because I know how happy it made her to see me pass. Overall all I can do is spend a lot of time with my mom stay positive and help her avoid stress

    mom
    I'm sorry your mom is going through this, Thartt. It is especially difficult this time of year.

    Congratulations on the nursing exam - I know your mom must be proud of you.

    Friends to talk to are here - we may not be your Saturday night friends but, as you can see, we can be the ones there early on Sunday morning :)

    Let us hear how you are doing - lots of people here with lots of experience who are willing to share.
  • username24
    username24 Member Posts: 2

    Losing
    My mom has had cancer since I was eleven. I am now 25. The battle has been long and rough. To see my mom, the only women I think that has ever loved me unconditionally is heartbreaking. Her cancer started in the breast,to colon, to liver, and just about everywhere in her abdomen now. Multiple surgeries, multiple rounds of chemo and radiation. Side effects and the slow loss of abilities. I love her so much. She is in a hospice now, cant eat, can't take her meds, can't really wake up. I hope that she can look in the eye tomorrow morning one last time so I can tell her how awesome she has been to me before she passes. I've already realized our last times together doing "normal" things are over. Its so difficult to deal with the fact that I may never hear her talk to me or acknowledge me ever again. I'm scared for my father. I don't want to abandon him but I know I can't be around my childhood home and see all the places she used to sit. I've come to accept there is nothing I could have done to stop this from happening, but now that her death is right before me I wish I had all the time back. I hope she is not suffering. I don't want my mom to go away. I miss talking to her. I wish she could break though the pain meds and the toxins building up from her liver and just see me with a clear head for just a moment so she can tell me what she wants and I can tell her I love her and to not be afraid to go if she needs to I don't want her to suffer anymore

    Just found out
    I just found out that my mom has stage 3 gastric cancer. I'm barely in my teens. I really don't know what to do...
  • username24
    username24 Member Posts: 2

    Losing
    My mom has had cancer since I was eleven. I am now 25. The battle has been long and rough. To see my mom, the only women I think that has ever loved me unconditionally is heartbreaking. Her cancer started in the breast,to colon, to liver, and just about everywhere in her abdomen now. Multiple surgeries, multiple rounds of chemo and radiation. Side effects and the slow loss of abilities. I love her so much. She is in a hospice now, cant eat, can't take her meds, can't really wake up. I hope that she can look in the eye tomorrow morning one last time so I can tell her how awesome she has been to me before she passes. I've already realized our last times together doing "normal" things are over. Its so difficult to deal with the fact that I may never hear her talk to me or acknowledge me ever again. I'm scared for my father. I don't want to abandon him but I know I can't be around my childhood home and see all the places she used to sit. I've come to accept there is nothing I could have done to stop this from happening, but now that her death is right before me I wish I had all the time back. I hope she is not suffering. I don't want my mom to go away. I miss talking to her. I wish she could break though the pain meds and the toxins building up from her liver and just see me with a clear head for just a moment so she can tell me what she wants and I can tell her I love her and to not be afraid to go if she needs to I don't want her to suffer anymore

    Just found out
    I just found out that my mom has stage 3 gastric cancer. I'm barely in my teens. I really don't know what to do...
  • ettevyva
    ettevyva Member Posts: 4
    Please research Low Dose Naltrexone
    Do you know about Low Dose Naltrexone !
    new
    It saved me! It's about $12.00 a month (without insurance coverage). It's a prescription with no side effects (except gave me amazing energy!) I'm a three time cancer survivor (2001, 2006, 2010). 3 weeks ago I had a mass and kept being called back for more ultrasounds. I've been on 2 mg of LDN for about 8 months, now. The results is they can find NO CANCER in the mass. Please Google Low Dose Naltrexone for Cancer. Also, Low Dose Naltrexone Homepage. It is a prescription. Naltrexone is FDA approved. Big Pharmas can't make a profit on it so do not inform doctors about it. Low Dose Naltrexone saved me! Please do the research. Dr. Biari gave it to stage 4 cancer patients that survived. People can beat it.

    I learned about it on the FACEBOOK forums for LDN. Just put Low Dose Naltrexone in Facebook search.
    http://www.lowdosenaltrexone.org/ldn_and_cancer.htm
  • Deena11
    Deena11 Member Posts: 199 Member
    You are a strong person
    Hi krisyjsu04-
    My situation is a little different. I have colon cancer (just found out I am in remission two weeks ago). My parents live in a different state and couldn't travel to be with me during all my chemo treatments and surgeries. Dad is in early onset Alzheimers and he is my Mom's caregiver. She had a Pituitary tumor years ago and when they removed it, they damaged her optic nerves and she became blind. They both are unable to travel. I live alone and they both felt like they wanted to be with me and take care of me. I was too sick to travel so I haven't seen them in almost a year. We are very close so it was extremely difficult for all of us. I can only imagine how helpless they felt not being able to be with me to comfort and support me. I worried about them because they felt so guilty and that was the last thing I wanted them to feel. I worried about them worrying about me so much! There were times I was struggling with medical complications and was admitted to the hospital several times. I didn't tell them about a few of those times so they wouldn't worry or feel helpless. Of course, I wish they could have been with me but it wouldn't have helped to make them worry so much when they were unable to help.

    The good news is, I am able to travel now and will be spending two weeks with them at Christmas. We all can't wait to see each other. I miss them sooooooo much!

    Thinking of you with positive thoughts and prayers.
    Deena
  • Huuman
    Huuman Member Posts: 1
    Huuman

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