Jr's in hospital

rose20
rose20 Member Posts: 258
Finally Jr had to give in and go to ER yesterday morning, he was there for hours before they put in the IV. Later he was taken to his room.

Tuesday they will scope him.

Thank you to everyone for your replies about the stent and to Loretta and Bill (my angels on earth) who did research for me on stents.

We have no idea what lies ahead for Jr. just pray that he will be comfortable and have peace.

We all wish he never had the stent but at the time we knew nothing about esophageal cancer and the doctors made everything sound so urgent, and of course this cancer is, but we knew we had to move fast and Jr was not even given the option of a J-tube, never heard of one, just to have a stent, so of course ,trusting the thoracic surgeon at the Chicago hospital the stent was placed.
Thinking this was going to solve his eating problems but it only caused severe pain and suffering.

My heart is broken, not just for my dear brother but for all of you suffering with this disease.
The ancient old question resurfaces, WHY SO MUCH SUFFERING??

I know this is not heaven, I know God only knows, but in times like these I still feel the need to ask WHY???

WHY?! did my son have to leave us after just turning 20???????????????????? HE was just a baby. My baby boy. I can't touch his precious hair, I can't see his sweet smile. I can't hear his voice say, "mom."
I have grieved daily for him, and now my body is physically going down as well.
I know he is in heaven, I know he is safe in the arms of Jesus, but I WANT HIM!!!!!!!!!!
I'm his mommy.

Now my brother. I watch him go bit by bit.
Suffering.
So today I ask WHY??????????????

I understand death, that we all must die, but suffer???? suffer for almost 3 years???
My brother was suffering way before he was diagnosed, thinking it was a bad case of acid reflux, then being told it was GERD.
He kept throwing up everything he ate and dranked.
Then all of this.

I love God, as you all know here, I am not ashamed to say I am a believer in Jesus Christ, and I do trust Him that He knows what He is doing but I am only flesh here and it hurts. It hurts so bad to see so many suffering, to hear another one is gone.

I know death, I felt clothed in death when my son was taken away so quickly. Death is so final here.
I have my son's shoes still sitting at my front door, I know he is not coming back but I can't bear to take his shoes away.

Forgive me, I'm just a bit emotional right now.
I am planning to see my brother today and I know the shock of seeing him so thin will be so hard for me to see. He was always so big, very broad shouldered.

One day we will know what this is really all about, until then we love and then have to see those we love go one by one.

Comments

  • rose20
    rose20 Member Posts: 258
    feeding through the port
    AT 6pm today they finally began feeding Jr. through his port. It is very thick liquid, had to be special made.
    Tomorrow will be the scope.
  • Guigna
    Guigna Member Posts: 63
    suffering
    i am so sorry to hear of your pain. We are suffering here too. My husband had a stent put in what was it, in April? Today he can barely swallow. He has no energy. He has lots of pain. This wonderful man was the spunkiest healthiest guy in our family, in his office. Everywhere. Now he is a pain-wracked frail old man. and this happened in less than a year. This cancer wants to kill you. Sad but true. I am sorry you lost your young son as well.
  • BMGky
    BMGky Member Posts: 621
    Sorry you all are having to
    Sorry you all are having to face such trials. Prayers for his comfort and peace. BMGky
  • anaqvi
    anaqvi Member Posts: 13
    Guigna said:

    suffering
    i am so sorry to hear of your pain. We are suffering here too. My husband had a stent put in what was it, in April? Today he can barely swallow. He has no energy. He has lots of pain. This wonderful man was the spunkiest healthiest guy in our family, in his office. Everywhere. Now he is a pain-wracked frail old man. and this happened in less than a year. This cancer wants to kill you. Sad but true. I am sorry you lost your young son as well.

    Stenting with EC
    I read in your above post that your husband had stent, please tell me what is patients feeling after stent, and what comforts does stent bring in patients life? means how his intakes improve with stent. As my daddy T3N1Mo, is going to have stent tomorrow, as doctor said that he is not a candidate of cancer cure.

    Anaqvi
  • anaqvi
    anaqvi Member Posts: 13
    rose20 said:

    feeding through the port
    AT 6pm today they finally began feeding Jr. through his port. It is very thick liquid, had to be special made.
    Tomorrow will be the scope.

    all prayers for Jr.
    Rose our prayers and good wishes are with you and Jr. May God bless him with comfort.
    Does he has stent?

    Anaqvi
  • anaqvi said:

    Stenting with EC
    I read in your above post that your husband had stent, please tell me what is patients feeling after stent, and what comforts does stent bring in patients life? means how his intakes improve with stent. As my daddy T3N1Mo, is going to have stent tomorrow, as doctor said that he is not a candidate of cancer cure.

    Anaqvi

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