Dad has stage ii, had surgery in Oct. it's back

Bclowers
Bclowers Member Posts: 14
My dad was diagnosed stage II ES back in May 2011. At MD Anderson immediately for 29 days chemo/radiation. Scan showed no more but we opted to have major surgery and remove that section. During surgery they didn't see anything! Scan 1= perfect! By May 2012 he had difficulty swallowing and jt's back. Now we're on 4 rounds of chemo. with a port for 3 days on, 11 off. He JUST TESTED POSITIVE FOR HER2. Now what? Any tips? Is my dad done? Is this like heart disease or any other and you just treat and fight? Please help me understand and give words of wisdom for me to help my mom. They are only 56. This is too early to be the end!

Comments

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    No wisdom for you, just wanted to say....
    how sorry I am.

    EC is a very wicked, very aggressive cancer.

    I wish your father best success in pushing back and finding a win. I hope it's possible for you.

    Terry
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost to EC 06/19/12
  • Bclowers
    Bclowers Member Posts: 14
    TerryV said:

    No wisdom for you, just wanted to say....
    how sorry I am.

    EC is a very wicked, very aggressive cancer.

    I wish your father best success in pushing back and finding a win. I hope it's possible for you.

    Terry
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost to EC 06/19/12

    Thank you so much!

    Thank you so much!
  • Bclowers
    Bclowers Member Posts: 14
    Bclowers said:

    Thank you so much!

    Thank you so much!

    Dad went to ER 103 temp, pneumonia
    It just keeps kickin ya in the gut! Instead of meeting our family in Gulf Shores mom and dad are at MD Anderson in the ER due to Dad's spike in fever and the think it's pneumonia. Do the hits ever stop. I'm hurting but my mom seems like she is being tortured. I can 't even imagine the helplessness she feels. Watching a mountain of a man who could take of the world reduced to nothing.
  • Bclowers
    Bclowers Member Posts: 14
    Bclowers said:

    Thank you so much!

    Thank you so much!

    Dad went to ER 103 temp, pneumonia
    It just keeps kickin ya in the gut! Instead of meeting our family in Gulf Shores mom and dad are at MD Anderson in the ER due to Dad's spike in fever and the think it's pneumonia. Do the hits ever stop. I'm hurting but my mom seems like she is being tortured. I can 't even imagine the helplessness she feels. Watching a mountain of a man who could take of the world reduced to nothing.
  • Amjosmom
    Amjosmom Member Posts: 212
    The end?...
    It's only the end when your dad decides to quit!! This fight is a hard one. Don't give up. Fight hard, but surrender completely to God's will. Be strong. And read up... A LOT!!
  • Bclowers
    Bclowers Member Posts: 14
    Amjosmom said:

    The end?...
    It's only the end when your dad decides to quit!! This fight is a hard one. Don't give up. Fight hard, but surrender completely to God's will. Be strong. And read up... A LOT!!

    I will say that this whole
    I will say that this whole thing has lead my parents back to the Lord. I just need some hope for my mom. My dad has a brave face, but Mom really worries me.
  • captdave
    captdave Member Posts: 153
    Bclowers said:

    I will say that this whole
    I will say that this whole thing has lead my parents back to the Lord. I just need some hope for my mom. My dad has a brave face, but Mom really worries me.

    As the EC patient I found it
    As the EC patient I found it easy to put on the brave face as you put it. It's easy when you're the one that ultimately has to make the decisions and choose to fight this beast. You have some degree of control. My wife felt helpless and totally out of control. Nothing she did or said could affect the outcome. She was like a passenger in a car going over a cliff. Powerless to stop it but still along for the ride if she wanted to be or not. Hope this helps you understand why your mom might be more affected by your dads EC then he appears to be.

    Dave
  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    captdave said:

    As the EC patient I found it
    As the EC patient I found it easy to put on the brave face as you put it. It's easy when you're the one that ultimately has to make the decisions and choose to fight this beast. You have some degree of control. My wife felt helpless and totally out of control. Nothing she did or said could affect the outcome. She was like a passenger in a car going over a cliff. Powerless to stop it but still along for the ride if she wanted to be or not. Hope this helps you understand why your mom might be more affected by your dads EC then he appears to be.

    Dave

    Thanks for putting that into words, Dave
    You hit it on the nose. Totally helpless to do anything to affect the outcome. Not that the patient has much more control, but...

    You've put my feelings into words, and I'm grateful.

    Terry
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost battle to EC, June 19,2012
  • AngieD
    AngieD Member Posts: 493
    TerryV said:

    Thanks for putting that into words, Dave
    You hit it on the nose. Totally helpless to do anything to affect the outcome. Not that the patient has much more control, but...

    You've put my feelings into words, and I'm grateful.

    Terry
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost battle to EC, June 19,2012

    My husband, Larry, was
    My husband, Larry, was diagnosed with Stage IV EC just a little over a year ago in June 2011. In March, we went to ER when he had a fever of 102.5 and was diagnosed with pneumonia. They put him on IV Levaquin and gave him some respiratory therapy. He was like a brand new person the next morning and was dismissed that afternoon on oral Levaquin and felt fine from then on. So, hopefully, your dad will respond as well to treatment for the pneumonia. My husband's swallowing issue resolved after the first round of chemo. He has been on intermittent chemo since last July. He eats and does whatever he wants. His last scan was so good he is on a chemo break until the next scan in September. We get what Stage IV is all about, but choose to just be grateful for the good year he has had and plan on enjoying every good day that comes. I can imagine how shocked and devastated your parents are after doing everything right and having the EC show back up. Chemo worked on it before and hopefully will again, I pray.
    Angie