How can you tell if its spreading to the brain?

Cpnqueen
Cpnqueen Member Posts: 29
I feel so helpless its almost like I'm looking at it from the outside. My husband seemed to be doing well which we were very grateful for, especially since my son has been dealing with another serious illness. Knowing he was feeling well I was able to concentrate a little more on getting my son well. Now my son is finally on the road to full recovery and my husband is acting weird. The doctors had to stop the "platnum" part of the chemo he was getting and now he has needed pain pills again (so far only once a day) and he doesn't seem to remember simple things that he used to know like the back of his hand. Its minor things but still has me wondering. I say I want to call the doctor and he says no lets wait till my next treatment next week. I know that it has started to spread to his lung, its a very small spot but its there. This damm disease already has his stomach and his bones now his lungs and maybe.... When does god feel he has inflicted enough pain on someone??? It hurts so much to see him sick and I can only cry when I am alone because I do not want my kids to see. I am trying to make things as normal as possible for everyone and trying to make occasions even more special since they may be the last one but it is taking its toll on me. I don't know how much longer I can keep up the "front".

Comments

  • Chippidy
    Chippidy Member Posts: 8
    I know it's Hard
    I thought I'd respond as it doesn't seem like many come on here. Wondering where the SUPPORT is? I think it's probably just hard to come on. I know I've stayed away for a couple of months.

    In any event, I'm sorry, and I know it's hard -- keeping things normal. And having to deal with a son on top of your husband must be awfully stressful. I work and have two children to raise. It's a juggling act, and something usually falls.

    I don't think that the cancer is necessarily in the brain. I do think that chemo can make one confused and not as sharp as usual. My love was diagnosed in November with Stage 4 stomach cancer. He has it in his lungs too. He just hasn't been very responsive. I have to "make" him talk to me. It's hard because it makes me feel lonely. I always tell him he can talk to me about anything. I think part might also be due to depression.

    Hang in there.
  • have2believe
    have2believe Member Posts: 134
    Allow yourself to feel weak and to cry
    There is a common side effect called chemo brain. My mom has become forgetful at times and we try to brush it off as though it's an age thing...though she's only 62. Being a mother and wife, among many other roles must be so difficult. I also silently cry so that I can put on a brave face, though there are times when I just let it out.

    Acknowledge that this is a huge blow for anyone dealing w/ such a disease. Acknowledge that you can't appear strong all the time.
  • have2believe
    have2believe Member Posts: 134
    Chippidy said:

    I know it's Hard
    I thought I'd respond as it doesn't seem like many come on here. Wondering where the SUPPORT is? I think it's probably just hard to come on. I know I've stayed away for a couple of months.

    In any event, I'm sorry, and I know it's hard -- keeping things normal. And having to deal with a son on top of your husband must be awfully stressful. I work and have two children to raise. It's a juggling act, and something usually falls.

    I don't think that the cancer is necessarily in the brain. I do think that chemo can make one confused and not as sharp as usual. My love was diagnosed in November with Stage 4 stomach cancer. He has it in his lungs too. He just hasn't been very responsive. I have to "make" him talk to me. It's hard because it makes me feel lonely. I always tell him he can talk to me about anything. I think part might also be due to depression.

    Hang in there.

    other forms of support
    Yes, I wish this forum was more active. I actually visit the colorectal one more because I'm able to follow people better and often the treatments are similar, where this one is more like people post 1-5 times and then you don't hear anything. Though I do understand that people are often in various stages of the disease and treatment process. I also visit cancercompass.com where you'll see there are people who are stage 4 and NED (no evidence of disease). Can't Stomach Cancer is also an awesome foundation that is holding a free stomach cancer symposium in April (you can attend in person or via web broadcast). There is also a facebook group someone started so that can be helpful too (look at previous posts).
  • Cpnqueen
    Cpnqueen Member Posts: 29

    other forms of support
    Yes, I wish this forum was more active. I actually visit the colorectal one more because I'm able to follow people better and often the treatments are similar, where this one is more like people post 1-5 times and then you don't hear anything. Though I do understand that people are often in various stages of the disease and treatment process. I also visit cancercompass.com where you'll see there are people who are stage 4 and NED (no evidence of disease). Can't Stomach Cancer is also an awesome foundation that is holding a free stomach cancer symposium in April (you can attend in person or via web broadcast). There is also a facebook group someone started so that can be helpful too (look at previous posts).

    Support
    I did join the group on facebook and there are some really amazing people in that group. Unfortunately my children also found the group so it limits what I can say since I try and hide alot from them.
    I know this site isn't that active and I really do appreciate the support I have received. It is just extremly hard. We just got my son walking again after 7 months (he hurt his foot and developed RSD) and I guess I let my guard down because the next thing I knew my husband was in pain again. He had not taken any pain meds in almost 4 months and this week it has become everyday and the eating is questionable. Of course his doctor is on vacation till Monday / Tuesday so I will have to wait it out the weekend and hope he doesn't require an ER visit. It is so hard to work and take care of everybody and everything!